To be fuming DH left our 8yo to supervise the baby while he mowed the lawn??

Some couples are both deaf...

Whilst in charge of a toddler?

Maybe wait 10 mins for OP to return?

Dear god. OP you are right to be furious. All these pp would be saying the opposite if your post said that the child was harmed while being looked after by a 8 year old. They would all say totally unreasonable that the DH left the child with an 8 year old. You are also completely right about he shower being ok where they are upstairs and the door is open..completely different..please look at the responses that agree with you, not the ones that don't. Obviously the 8 year old should not have drawn on the baby but you didn't ask for opinions about that and you have said you are going to deal with it..Mumsnet is an odd place

Hardly no adult. An adult is still on the premises. If 2 young kids can't be left to play together for "minutes" at a time then there's something very controlling and weird going on in the house.
I assume the children are allowed to sleep without someone hovering over them ? Is the 8 year old allowed to the toilet or bath on their own? It sounds like they've literally never been out of sight of an adult their entire lives.
And not thinking an 8 year old wouldn't know better really just shows how strangely they're being raised. That 8 year old just sounds weird, like she's being kept like a baby on purpose.
My 8 year old got himself ready for school and walked there.

So what if he was actually deaf?

Should deaf people not be allowed children?

It was an idiotic thing to do and there is a fair question about SEN if an 8 year old thinks drawing over their younger sibling is in anyway acceptable...

The child that was expected to be the parent whilst the actual parent made himself deaf?

That child?

I don't think he should have left your toddler out of earshot with your 8 year old. Agreed that anything can happen and you have to be ready to jump in.

However, at 8 years old, drawing over the toddler is also completely unacceptable and doesn't show much care or consideration for the sibling.

So two problems to deal with there really.

No one called her an idiot – unless it was the post that has since been removed, in which case it was one person.

There's nothing wrong in questioning whether a child has SEN if she does something typical to below her developmental age – and it's a useful question as then it gives ammunition to whether the dad should have left her alone with the toddler.

If OP is annoyed at the drawing then the 8yr old has done the undesirable behaviour. If they they the little girl is apt to do these things – then the DH should know better. If it's not specifically the drawing and more at what dangers could have happened, then the drawing is a moot point anyway.

Even if the "parent" is deaf, which he was?

You are determined to be angry and no amount of people telling you to chill out and deal with your DD using your baby as an etch a sketch is going to make you change your mind. So why bother posting? Divorce DH and pay a gardener to cut the lawn if he is that terrible.

Delegation is not an absolution of responsibility so YANBU. If your husband left your DD 'in charge' at 8yrs old then he needed to be doing a task where he could listen out for any suspicious noises or cries and pop by every few minutes for a visual check.

In some houses with a rear living room, small garden and electric mower this night be okay but it doesn't sound like this was the case here.

YANBU - I would be furious too if my DH had left an 16 mo old unsupervised long enough to cut the grass. It’s not the job of an 8 year old to supervise a baby of that age. I’m with you - it takes a second to choke / slip etc

This

Me too, It's so risky.
Alarming that not many mothers on this thread recognise risk.

Why would your 8 year old draw on the baby, sounds like you have issues to deal with there, and you are angry because you left your baby, you could have taken the baby with you.

No you are not unreasonable. Its was irresponsible of him he wouldn't have heard screams or crys for help from the house from either of them utterly ridiculous of him. My toddler once sat on my lap flipped his head back into mine so hard it broke my nose I had instant black eyes streaming with tears. One once breathed a leaf in the got stuck in his throat we had to fish it out as he went blue. There is a reason we don't leave children alone. Id ne fuming

So she's expected to be parenting at 8 years old?
And now she's naughty?
Way to go for using kids and blaming them.

Crazy ideas on this thread. I fear for some children, I really do.

FFS! Do you think us single parents never mow the lawn etc?

Of course your 8 year old should have been able to be left with their sibling for a couple of minutes without drawing all over themselves or their sibling!

Do you never do housework etc if alone with the children?

My 6 year old granddaughter would know better than to scribble over her baby sister.

Your 8 year old was naughty. Your DH was in the garden and available if needed.

Totally agree with you...

You don't think anyone is blaming the 8yr old?

She's been called an idiot, questioning if she has sen, and more.
It's been disgusting behaviour from women who seem to be mothers themselves.

Toxic people!!

How many times have mums on here done the same thing while having a shower. Out of sight, hearing blocked by running water. The fact that it’s inside the house is irrelevant. It’s the same thing.