Autistic child shouting/screaming in the garden

The little card sounds like a great idea - explain his needs and that he won’t be in garden before X or after Y and he loves trips out so sometimes won’t be home. It’s his happy noise and if you try to stop it it could turn into an unhappy noise - so he’s got the right to be happy. Hopefully they’ll understand. Glad he’s enjoying the garden!!

100% yes

No SEN - screaming all day. Inconsiderate bloody parents
SEN - tough gig. Annoying but understandable. Poor kid. Poor parents.

Would the noise be less annoying just because the maker of noise had SEN.?

I suppose knowing that might make you a nit more tolerate towards it but not change the actual noise

I am that person too. My son when stimming does a loud wooing sound. He doesn't go out early or stay out late, it's in small bursts as I'll take him in for a bit and go out and about often. I would love for him to be less loud but at the end of the day what can we do? He's non verbal with severe LD and doesn't understand how to be quiet, it's his happy noise and his only voice. Short of gagging him or never letting him out I'm pretty stuck, I don't have the money for a large detached in the middle of nowhere. My logic is that it's part of neighbourhood life, I don't complain about the happy dog next door, the night time music two doors down, banging on the walls when the teenager is having a strop, it's life. Also perfectly legal as long as not at antisocial hours. He friendly to your neighbours and explain, but at the end of the day he has a right to live and have his voice.

Unfortunately he will be spoiling their outside time but you can only do what you can do and as reasonable people they can probably understand the situation and hope it improves.

I voted YABU because as a SEN mum myself, you cannot get through your child’s childhood worrying about what other people think. You have to let go any embarrassment, anxiousness, or worry about being judged. It took me a while to do this but it's so liberating. My child will express themselves how they will, have meltdowns in public, be very active and loud, etc and deciding not to worry about other's opinions is a gift to your child and yourself. That anxiety will transfer to them and also stress you beyond belief. Trust me. Stop worrying.
Also many ordinary kids are loud and lively, perhaps even more than your child. Nobody else feels they should apologise for them existing.
Sending all strength to your elbow.

Dear little chap. I wouldn't mind at all but it might be a good idea to let people know if you think it would help with acceptance / people making pointed remarks over the fencem

Why send a note when you could go and speak to them direct? If they are your neighbours surely you would be introducing yourselves?

If people are set on peace and quiet they should perhaps live further out of town. You are a considerate person, that’s obvious. You can’t ban your child from their own garden.

Well yes

there’s quite a difference between an male adult sized teen non verbal and shouting in the garden
vs
an 8 year old

I wouldn't personally say or do anything unless you happen to be in conversation with them and it crops up.
As your neighbour, I would be able to recognise your son's issues and it wouldn't be a problem for me.

I wouldn't write this.
This could set up a false expectation.
There may well be nothing you can do to temper the noise.
My son has no control of his vocal stims. Trying to quieten him would make it worse.

As a very private person who enjoys quiet honestly, if you told me of your circumstances I would learn to live with it.

This is interesting as I think this is the case for one of our neighbours. For weeks I heard this horrible shrieking noise and I quickly assumed it was a child with SEN but not sure exactly which house it was coming from. It is undeniably unpleasant to hear, but I reckon he/she has just as much right to be in their garden as a NT child. I do close the window if it gets a bit much but by and large I just feel sympathy for the family

Our next door neighbour has a non verbal child who makes lots of different noises. I have children of my own and don’t mind at all. I think it’s very considerate (and appropriate ) to be mindful of morning and evening noise. Your child has just as much right tone it his garden as your neighbours do. It sounds like you’re considerate and thoughtful so please don’t feel worried or guilty about what noise there is. No harm in a polite note dropped to your neighbours, explaining the situation, but don’t let yoursekf or your so be pushed indoors

Of course he has a right to exist, but I'm afraid if I lived next to you, that would make me utterly miserable, because in summer most people want to have their windows and doors open to let in some fresh air, but if that air is accompanied every day by shouting and groaning it would be very intrusive. I'm not trying to make you feel worse (honestly!), but I really feel for your poor neighbours. By all means go and have a chat with them or write them a note, if you feel too stressed about it to face them, but I would also be prepared for them to not be happy.

Please don't worry. You and your son are legally entitled to enjoyment of your garden. Anyone expecting perfect peace in a suburban garden is unreasonable. Noise happens. We all live with road and airplane noise every day, and accept it.

I'd drop a card into each neighbour, introducing yourself, and explaining that your son is SEN and can be a bit noisy sometimes, but that you will do your best to mitigate that.

Then you've pre-empted any complaints, you've explained what is going on, and given your neighbours a chance to get their heads round the change.

I hope you are happy in your new home xx

I should maybe have clarified he is a teen now but wasn't when they moved in there over 8 years ago and the OP's DS will be a teenager one day. Not everyone understands SN, even after you explain, and some people themselves are noise intolerant, and some are just intolerant.

Next door but one has a child like yours (I think, I don't know them but hear him). I am glad he sounds happy when he's out in the garden, no matter how noisy for us.

Absolutely

but I hope the op follows my advice to drop neighbours a note to explain

I wouldn’t worry about it. He has the right to exist

Just carry on. Your son is part of the world. Try not to worry, if you were my neighbour I wouldn’t mind at all.

It may be because a teen boy, size of a man, is quite intimidating out in the garden, non verbal but shouting loudly and often.