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Original poster

Autistic child shouting/screaming in the garden

235 replies

SimplyStarry · 24/08/2025 15:48

Autistic child is mine! Please can I have some options as I am very on edge. My son is autistic and non-verbal although he does say lots of words. I’ve recently moved house to a nice area, nice house, quiet neighbours. The garden is quite big and any sound tends to echo around. DS is a loud vocal stimmer - if he plays with water outside or spins my rotary line he shouts and does a loud, low AAAAGH! I’m hyper aware of how loud he is.

I’m next door (not joined) to an older couple with an immaculate garden, they do look after their grandchildren but I’m aware of how loud my son is when they are sitting out their garden. Joined onto my house is a family with 3 kids so not too bad.

He only goes out after 10am and I make sure he’s in early. We do go out a lot so he’s not out all the time.

I try and tell him to be a bit quieter and distract him too. I’m concerned that a neighbour might complain. What would you do?

Thank you.

OP posts:
Sturtium · 24/08/2025 16:07

cariadlet · 24/08/2025 16:02

I agree with sending a card.

You're already being considerate by making sure that he doesn't go out in the garden too early or stay out late but, tbh, I would still find the noise really annoying - until I realised that he had SEN and then I would be much more understanding.

I am pretty antisocial and get irritated by other people's noise. Plenty of other people wouldn't mind at all but it won't hurt to send a card in case your neighbours are miseries like me!

I just want to say, I don’t think being noise sensitive = being a misery, AT ALL.

if we can accept sensory overload is a variable spectrum, then we can accept that some people are more sensitive to noise than others! I’m with you: I’d be really stressed by the noise.. I DO get really stressed by noise. I think it’s a real problem these days, that people shout into their phones in supposedly quiet places and play tV shows out loud on their phones while on public transport! It’s hard to cope with!

BessieSurtees · 24/08/2025 16:07

While you can explain his SEN, don't be upset if they do not understand, I think you need to let them get on with it because you can't be restricting your DS worrying about the neighbours and, as you say, you already compromising.

One of my best friends has a teenage son who is non verbal and very vocal in doors and out. In truth I would not like to live next door to her as it is non stop. Her life is stressful enough worrying about what others think though.

Neither of her neighbours speak to her and two of them have changed their garden layout since she moved in. One of them with a huge fence. One set of neighbours will not allow their DC to play with him and the other wont let their DGC in the garden when her son is outdoors.

CurbsideProphet · 24/08/2025 16:06

Our neighbour's DC has autism and they told us as soon as they moved in. We have a small child so aren't quiet ourselves anyway! But even if we didn't we appreciated them letting us know, as when we hear them in the garden we just think "sounds like they're having fun" and that's the end of it.

cariadlet · 24/08/2025 16:02

I agree with sending a card.

You're already being considerate by making sure that he doesn't go out in the garden too early or stay out late but, tbh, I would still find the noise really annoying - until I realised that he had SEN and then I would be much more understanding.

I am pretty antisocial and get irritated by other people's noise. Plenty of other people wouldn't mind at all but it won't hurt to send a card in case your neighbours are miseries like me!

Sweetmelonff · 24/08/2025 15:59

SimplyStarry · 24/08/2025 15:54

That’s a good idea, thank you. He’s (finally!) sleeping well at night so isn’t loud then, just in the garden. My last neighbours had a SEN child and understood. This garden/area is so quiet and echoy!

Show quote history

If you are going to do it, sit down and write it now and post it through their letterboxes this afternoon. Just get it done and dusted

Sturtium · 24/08/2025 15:58

It’s lovely if you to be aware of others and I am sure they would feel happier if you spoke to them about the situation, it shows you care, which is always a very good thing. 💜

Bodyshopdewberry · 24/08/2025 15:56

I wouldnt have an issue with this at all. Annoying tinny music playing all day, yes. Child enjoying himself, no.

Original poster
SimplyStarry · 24/08/2025 15:54

Sweetmelonff · 24/08/2025 15:51

I would write to your neighbours a card explaining the situation and that you are in the process of learning strategies to help him reduce / stop this behaviour but to be grateful for their patience whilst you do so

That’s a good idea, thank you. He’s (finally!) sleeping well at night so isn’t loud then, just in the garden. My last neighbours had a SEN child and understood. This garden/area is so quiet and echoy!

OP posts:
LegoMaxifigure · 24/08/2025 15:51

I'm sorry to hear that you are worried about him bothering others, I am sure you have enough stress anyway taking care of him. It's thoughtful of you.

You could pop round to each and explain a bit about his needs. It's always a fine line, you don't want to sort of stereotype or label him to others, but also they need to be aware that he isn't being "naughty". It would take a mean person to look you in the eye and grumble when you are explaining about him.

Sweetmelonff · 24/08/2025 15:51

I would write to your neighbours a card explaining the situation and that you are in the process of learning strategies to help him reduce / stop this behaviour but to be grateful for their patience whilst you do so