Sister went nuts over a cup of coffee

maybe spit in the coffee next time or tip it on her head then politely tell her to F off !! Along with your husband- do they usually gang up on you?? Seems like some deep routed hanger issues your sister has!!

Totally agree. I drink black coffee - fill it to the top!

I didn't tell you anything. My response was to OP and had nothing whatsoever to do with you or your situation. I fought with my sister constantly, even as young adults, we had a few scary fights, I had 2 black eyes and burst lips, she had a huge bald patch where I'd pulled out her hair. But we always quickly made up, we loved each other and I knew she had an undiagnosed problem.

Sorry you were abused by your mother and sister. We were all abused by our violent alcoholic mother, both physically and mentally. To the extent it caused my brother to develop schizophrenia in his late teens, we lost him at a young age. He was never her target but he hated her for what she did to us. My plans for the future were destroyed because we weren't allowed to sleep at night. I had to leave as soon as I could, and have been on my own since I was 16. First few years were so hard. Eventualily I went to uni and now have my dream home, and a very lucrative and successful career. My sister and I always went to see our mother, my older sister didn't and hates her still, even though she's been dead a few years now. Maybe I'm just lucky that I always stayed close to my 2 sisters, we supported each other through our terrible home life, and through being out on our own from a very young age. I'm so sorry you didn't have that with your sister, but OP obviously does have a relationship with her sister, and it could be a good one.

I've a couple of conflicting opinions on this given my situation lol
Of course you don't fill to the brim, it gets spilled and tea/coffee stains everywhere! The person can go out halfway through their cup if they take a while and/or want it fuller and reboil the kettle!
OR they can clean any and all mess they make. Which everyone won't so 'half a cup' (which is actually probably 7/9ths it is!)
Secondly, and here's the conflicting part - is she your younger sister by a few years? I only assume given your DH age but it's a generalisation obviously. If she is, and being a younger sister with my next sibling being 8 years older, yes I make fun of her (as she does me, possibly moreso!) to mess around and get each other's back up (ish). If she's younger she may think it's a 'game' almost. Yes, childish I know. but giving my opinion.

This is the equivalent of a parking thread without a diagram. We can't possibly judge whether you are being unreasonable without seeing how full or not you fill your coffee cups!

Regardless of anything else, it's so rude to slag off someone's drink they've made you. If it's "half a cup", surely she can drink that, and then have another if she wants more!

She sounds ridiculous. If she's close enough to you to be so impolite, she's close enough to make her OWN coffee when she comes round!

She'd be getting a coffee in a bottle from me for being such a fucking baby.

Tell 'em both to get to fuck

“Mmmm! Damn fine Largactyl!” ☕️

She is being unreasonable.
Tell her to Drink her bloody coffee and if she wants another one help herself. Or even better tell her to
make her own coffee.
Don’t tolerate her belittling you any more.

I would have got her to make her own a long time ago.

I go to a lovely friend once or twice a month and her husband makes the coffee in a very expensive coffee machine. But the cup is always only half full and always lukewarm!

I’ve yet to say anything, of course, but have thought of sneaking some hot water in a thermos flask when I visit!

And yes, your sister is being ludicrous, but presumably something else is really worrying or annoying her?

Hope it all resolves 💕

She sounds like a bit of a bitch. But she's your sister who comes over often, so she can make her own coffee and fill it up as much as she wants.

I get it that you don’t want to spill the coffee so why not buy larger mugs then she can enjoy a bigger drink. I like a nice amount of coffee and use large mugs. But she isn’t paying for it so she has a cheek to make you feel bad ,she should just ask you politely to fill it up a bit more while you are making it. And tell your dh to do one . I get this myself in cafes, I ask and pay for extra large coffee and it’s only just over half full with the rest froth I always go back and ask them to fill it up politely which they do.

It's not about the quantity of coffee, it's about being treated as a child when you're in your 40s (or 50s, as I'll wager the DH feels it too). If the sister has mentioned it lots of times and the OP just keeps insisting she can't be trusted with a full cup of coffee it would be maddening.

I suppose some people are always polite with their family but surely if you are close it is not about 'host' and 'guest' but about your relationship? i.e. it's not about the coffee, OP!

I’m glad to hear you eventually got along with your sister, but bollocks to the blanket sentiment of “don’t fall out with your sister” and “cherish every moment you have with your sister”. Not everyone has a great relationship with their sisters. Mine joined my mother in physically abusing me when I was a child. To this day, my sister abuses me verbally, emotionally, and mentally (I’m too large to abuse physically or I’m sure she’d still be doing that, too.)

Not every sister is to be automatically treasured simply because they’re your sister.

Mine is similar to OP’s in behavior and I avoid interacting with her as much as possible. It’s infuriating when someone tells me I ought to love and treasure her just because she’s my sister, when I know she’s the second-biggest abuser in my life right after my mother.

Were I OP, I’d be filling my sister’s mug right to the brim the next time she visited and when the scalding-hot coffee slipped out and burned her, I’d say, “isn’t a full cup of coffee what you WANTED?”

She sounds unhinged. Did she forget to take her medication?

Oh and if she's coming 3 times a week why can't she make the coffee, I don't understand why someone would cause an argument over something she could easily solve herself. If I'm at a friend or family house and I want the drink made the way I like it I just offer to put the kettle on and make the drinks, "you put your feet up Sandra, I'll make these" type thing.

Mugs can be very large and coffee tends to become cold quickly, no? I fill them half and tell my guests I will top up with hot coffee whenever they want more 🤷🏼‍♀️ Indeed it's not good manners at all to fill a mug to the top.

Mugs can be very large and coffee tends to become cold quickly, no? I fill them half and tell my guests I will top up with hot coffee whenever they want more 🤷🏼‍♀️ Indeed it's not good manners at all to fill a mug to the top.

There’s a wonderful old saying for this scenario: ‘‘Is the tide out?’

Bless you, as someone above said, her correct response to you making her a coffee should be thank you! This isn't about the coffee, your Sister sounds nuts and knows she can treat you like that, getting up in your face screaming at you would be the final straw for me personally, if it wasnt the coffee she'd choose something else as an excuse for her behaviour towards you. I have a shouty belittling brother like this and no longer see him, thankfully he lives miles away now, I email if i absolutely have to speak to him.

If you actually want to see her again (I wouldn't and you're allowed to say no or suddenly have a freind to see that day each week from now on or something), I'd suggest going out for coffee instead.

I'd also stop making the DH drinks, if he doesnt like the way you make it why doesn't he make it himself?
Your sister is nuts and your DH is encouraging her behaviour, sorry you are dealing with it

Sorry for your loss ❤️

If she enjoys your ‘short’ coffees so much she can have a second one, it’s not as if she can only have one cup is it?