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AIBU?

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Original poster

DS went through DH phone. DH blames me

335 replies

Evkopk · 24/08/2025 13:32

My sister’s phone had died and she needed to check her emails so asked to use mine. I was using mine so I unlocked my husband’s phone for her. My DH came downstairs and saw DS scrolling through his photos and ripped the phone from her hand.
He has since refused to talk to me and has deleted and blocked me from his phone, including the family groups.
Ive apologised but he doesn’t want to hear it. I am being unreasonable to think he should get over it? It’s been 2 weeks where he has refused to speak to me, nor can I contact him via his phone.

OP posts:
ASeriesOfTubes · 24/08/2025 13:50

PivotPivotmakingmargaritas · 24/08/2025 13:48

Her phone died and she needed to check her emails…. Yeah right try again. …..Was the battery dead if so she can just wait till it charges?!?! …. If it was a really urgent email you should have let her use your phone

you were both snooping and now you are trying to play the victim

This. I'm not buying it either.

wherecanifindteabags · 24/08/2025 13:49

You were in the wrong definitely but he’s now being a dick to carry this on after two weeks and refuse to engage in conversation. Have you not spoken at all? Has he moved out over it?

Mangetouts · 24/08/2025 13:48

So, you shouldn't have done it but a fortnight later? What's he hiding. It must have been something to warrant such an extreme reaction.

That aside, you need to ask him how long he's going to keep it up for. What does he expect from you?

PivotPivotmakingmargaritas · 24/08/2025 13:48

Her phone died and she needed to check her emails…. Yeah right try again. …..Was the battery dead if so she can just wait till it charges?!?! …. If it was a really urgent email you should have let her use your phone

you were both snooping and now you are trying to play the victim

mondaytosunday · 24/08/2025 13:45

I hope he told his sister off too! I’d never give my DH’s phone to anyone, so you were wrong to do that (a quick phone call ok then she could hand the phone back) but she’s really in the wrong for looking through his stuff.

EineReiseDurchDieZeit · 24/08/2025 13:43

Also as an AIBU “DH blames me” of course he blames you it’s your fault !

rwalker · 24/08/2025 13:42

There nothing on my phone but I’m guarded about it

you just don’t do this you for giving it to her and for her to be looking through it with you watching

I’d be fuming and changing passwords on everything but the wouldn’t be silent for 2 weeks over it

also you don’t even seem to realise it was wrong

YetanotherNC25 · 24/08/2025 13:40

That’s a gross invasion of his privacy. Whether or not there’s something inappropriate, his phone is his own and there’s no way I would want another family member accessing it. She wasn’t using it for emails, she was snooping in his photos.
There’s no way you should have allowed this. He’s right to be annoyed and you could have irrevocably broken his trust.
Two weeks is a long time but if you’re acting like you’ve done nothing wrong I can see his point. You need to apologise immediately.

EineReiseDurchDieZeit · 24/08/2025 13:38

Really inappropriate to give her your DHs phone. I would be livid, it’s a massive invasion of privacy. He shouldn’t be still carrying it on two weeks later though, you should have the fight and move on.

ninjahamster · 24/08/2025 13:34

Well he certainly should not be ignoring you two weeks in but why on earth did you give her his phone? Phones are private and should only be used by those the owner deems suitable.