How do you forget how many drinks you have had on a night out?

But what does it matter exactly how many drinks he had? As long as he wasn't driving in which case only one or less.

Surely it makes no difference if he had four or seven. If you're concerned he was late then he was obviously enjoying himself, lingering and didn't want to come home yet.

The number of drinks is irrelevant. Someone could nurse two pints over three hours, someone else could drink three in an hour.

If you’re aware he’s driving drunk then you should address it or call the police - having lost a close friend to a drunk driver it’s disgusting that you haven’t

At least he didn’t drive in that state then. However if he’s been out had 3-4 drinks and the had rum and drove home last night then he would have been over the limit. He’s presumably a grown up so if he knew he was driving he should have turned the drinks down and told them he’s driving instead of giving in to peer pressure.
Back to your original question I don’t think it’s unreasonable to not know how many drinks you’ve had if you’ve been out drinking. But he is unreasonable (in fact more than unreasonable) to be driving and not keeping count

Aw, come on. Hardly necessary.

??? I don’t count!
Im either drinking or not drinking (if driving).
If I’m drinking I just drink, not count. I can feel when I’ve had enough without needing a number.

Is he back? Did he drive?

That’s the issue then, not him being able to remember how many. Why not just say that first off?

He clearly had too many to drive. Which is appalling.

3 or 4 drinks is definitely over the limit. And he’s likely having more and putting lives at risk.

Id say one drink early in the night so it’s mostly metabolised might be ok in England.

In Scotland, where I am, it’s lower so nobody I know has anything to drink at all if they are driving and it’s brilliant, there’s no grey area, you just say “ I’m driving” and there’s never any pressure to even have one drink.

Did you miss the bit about not knowing then driving?

I don't count my drinks. I would think most people wouldn't count them unless they had some issues that meant it needed to be monitored. This expectation of him counting drinks and needing to tell you how many he had sounds controlling.

How can you not know that 3-4 drinks is over the limit? He is special so it's not over the limit for him? You don't care about his driving or the people he might kill on the way home, you just want him at home with you. Raise your bar and stop dating this absolute scumbag.

Did he drive home when he was in that state last week?

I stopped reading at “My boyfriend has went out…”

If he’s drunk driving, and two is the limit in England, and maybe even one depending on what it is, then I’d be calling the police on him if he attempted to get behind the wheel. I’m really struggling that your question is why doesn’t he remember and not the very huge he’s drunk driving.

Absolutely unacceptable to drink any alcohol and drive. 3-4 drinks is over the limit. I would be calling the police.

He may not feel the effects, but its likely to be over the safe limit. Maybe significantly.

https://www.drinkdriving.org/bac-calculator.php

Drink driving is absolutely inexcusable.

End of story. I would have nothing more to do with him.

regarding forgetting how many you had, I would forget the entire night. That’s why I don’t drink!! Alcohol, by its very nature, makes you want more of it once you start.

So, your partner is happy to drink and drive and risk other people’s lives. What a scummy person. I’d focus on that rather than if he can remember how many he has had, and remember that this person might be driving your kids about after ‘3 or 4’ one day.

Easily.

I’ve been at my work’s Christmas do before and because it’s an open bar people grab drinks for you, you’re chatting, dancing etc and you just forget.

Doesn’t matter how many - that’s splitting hairs.

he drives drunk
he vomits all over the bathroom
he isn’t reliable

He’d be an ex bf if it was up to me and it wouldn’t be because he can’t count.

If it was about driving home drunk that would have been the subject of the post. The driving only came up as a secondary reason which is hard believe given its much more serious than not remembering how many you've had.

why is it your concern he has work tomorrow. He's an adult.

Why is it your concern how much he is drinking, whether he is going out, why does he have to tell you how many drinks he has had, you are exhibiting very controlling behaviours.

If you don't like his actions, then don't date him, but don't think he has to mould his behaviour to what you want, all youre doing is making him lie.

If you want to set a boundary by saying "I wont date a drinker, I won't date someone who is secretive about his whereabouts " - thats fine, but you cant then add on "you have to tell me how many drinks youve had , or you have to not go out if im not there" - thats the difference.