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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To leave my 5 year old in a doctors waiting room?

162 replies

BarbaraVineFan · 22/08/2025 20:14

I have to go to the doctor in a couple of weeks- I made an appointment to talk about my mental health/ hormones, as I am really struggling with my emotions at the moment and don’t feel right at all.

The problem is, I’m a lone parent to my 5 year old Dd , and i don’t want her hearing the conversation for obvious reasons. I don’t have any childcare help at all- no local family, friends will all be working- and I am really not sure what to do with DD for those 10-15 mins. I am pretty sure she will be ok reading a book or colouring by herself in the waiting room, but WIBU to leave her? I’m a bit nervous as of course I’ll be behind a closed door.

OP posts:
BrickSnakes · 22/08/2025 20:29

When I have to go in with my four year old I give him headphones and CBeebies stories on the radio. You’ll need to do similar and something to do with his hands.

MigGril · 22/08/2025 20:29

BarbaraVineFan · 22/08/2025 20:18

I could, but then I would have to postpone the appointment for a while. I’m a teacher and leaving school for a doctors appointment isn’t really the done thing in the first few weeks of term.

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Op as a teacher you should be able to take time out for appointments if you can reasonably have them outside of school hours.

I know I'm support staff but have had to have numerous hospital appointments this year during my working hours. My head hasn't bat an eye at it, sometimes it just has to be done.

Givenupshopping · 22/08/2025 20:28

BarbaraVineFan · 22/08/2025 20:22

I do have some, but I am a bit hesitant to ask them as they are all busy with their own families.

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I'm sure your colleagues aren't so busy with their own families that they would have a problem caring for your DD for an hour while you go to the doctors, particularly if you explain in the same way you have to us, ie, that you don't want your DD to hear what you need to discuss. I know I would happily do that for a colleague.

Overthebow · 22/08/2025 20:27

Sorry but no and they probably won’t allow it anyway. Who would be watching out for her? Not the receptionists. She would be alone with a room full of strangers.

Original poster
BarbaraVineFan · 22/08/2025 20:27

You are all right. I wasn’t thinking straight and the idea of headphones had never occurred to me! I’ll order some now :)

OP posts:
MixedBananas · 22/08/2025 20:27

5 isn't she at school? Couple weeka she ahould be back at school. If not rearrange for school hours.
No thats not acceptable. I wouldn't do that until a child is at least 12 or 13.
But avoid this issue by booking an apt within school hours.

Mrsttcno1 · 22/08/2025 20:27

I’d be really surprised if the doctors would be okay with this. Have you not got any mum friends you could ask? I have and would always be happy to help out any of my friends in this position.

user1476613140 · 22/08/2025 20:27

OrsolaRosso · 22/08/2025 20:16

Could you rearrange for when she will be at school?

This is what I would do. Be patient and wait until school is back.

Theextraordinaryisintheordinary · 22/08/2025 20:27

Take her in. Let her watch something with headphones on while you’re in there.

Crissy83 · 22/08/2025 20:26

Surely iPad with headphones?

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 22/08/2025 20:26

Can you take her in, but put her in big headphones, and let her watch a video, @BarbaraVineFan?

Womblingmerrily · 22/08/2025 20:25

@teksquad Nurses and receptionists are not babysitters. They are expensive members of staff who are rather busy.

gamerchick · 22/08/2025 20:25

And if you come out and she's gone? What would that do for your mental health?

You have to think of something else OP.

itsgettingweird · 22/08/2025 20:24

Ring the surgery and ask.

Im a LP and mine allowed ds to sit in reception with headphones and iPad whilst I had smear tests from a young age.

I think set up will matter. Ours had a children’s corner that was right next to reception and 2 doors out of the building that passed the other side of reception.

Failing that ask for a phone consult.

Original poster
BarbaraVineFan · 22/08/2025 20:22

crumblingschools · 22/08/2025 20:19

If you are a teacher don’t you have local teacher friends who can look after her

I do have some, but I am a bit hesitant to ask them as they are all busy with their own families.

OP posts:
HiCandles · 22/08/2025 20:20

I am a GP and we wouldn't allow this. I asked a mother only last week who was going to leave her 4yo there to bring him too.
I have asked one of the admin or reception staff to sit with a child before in similar situations. I would suggest asked for this beforehand though, so you're not springing it on the GP to organise. Ring up or put a request online, however you normally request an appt, and say what you have in your post. Emphasize that you need to talk about personal potentially upsetting issues and you don't want her exposed to it.

Or, can you wait until she's back at school?
Or, can she wear headphones with music or a video playing on a device during the appointment and stay in the room with you?

Original poster
BarbaraVineFan · 22/08/2025 20:20

JaneGrint · 22/08/2025 20:17

Could you get some headphones and a show / audio book playing on your phone so that she’s listening to that and not listening into your conversation with the GP?

That’sa good idea. She has never had headphones but maybe I could get some for the occasion!

OP posts:
crumblingschools · 22/08/2025 20:19

If you are a teacher don’t you have local teacher friends who can look after her

CeciliaMars · 22/08/2025 20:19

What if she gets up and walks out? Whose job is it to go after her? You really can’t do this.

ArabiattaPrawn · 22/08/2025 20:19

Ask for a phone appointment or do it when she's in school. You can't just leave her unattended, the receptionists cannot be responsible for minding her for any amount of time. What if they're on the phone and she just gets up and walks off?

Digdongdoo · 22/08/2025 20:19

They probably won't let you do that. It also sounds like it might end up being a longer appointment. You'll have to arrange a babysitter or reschedule for when schools are back if you don't want her to come in with you.

FartyAnimal · 22/08/2025 20:18

I was a GP receptionist for a couple of years and would definitely have looked after your child for ten minutes.

RattyMcBatty · 22/08/2025 20:18

Ask for a telephone appointment. Failing that, do what I had to do many years ago and take a notebook and communicate by writing.

crumblingschools · 22/08/2025 20:18

headphones and tablet

Original poster
BarbaraVineFan · 22/08/2025 20:18

OrsolaRosso · 22/08/2025 20:16

Could you rearrange for when she will be at school?

I could, but then I would have to postpone the appointment for a while. I’m a teacher and leaving school for a doctors appointment isn’t really the done thing in the first few weeks of term.

OP posts:
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