Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To stop chucking neighbours kids ball back?

80 replies

feereroo · 22/08/2025 15:17

I have had a lot of issues with the neighbours kids since we all moved here.

The kids are 5 and 7.

They are loud, used to trespass all over my property, look into my windows and just generally cause a nuisance until big plant pots went up.

They bang in my door at 8pm in the evening waking my kids up demanding their ball back.

I wanted to remain friendly with the mum and would take delivery of her parcels, do her bin when she was at work/holiday.

I never got a thank you so I stopped doing it.
Her kids used to say “hello” but now they just blank us.

The football has been over the fence a lot of the summer and when I have been able to (have toddlers) I have always thrown it back over the fence.

I have stopped the parcels and bins and now when the ball goes over I am tempted not to throw it back given that they all just blank us now.

The balls are back in the garden again after I threw it back over last night.

AIBU?

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Phoenixfire1988 · 29/08/2025 21:09

Ball ? What ball ? I'd ignore the door completely at that time of night

Wrenjay · 25/08/2025 20:40

When our DCs were playing ball in the garden it rarely went over to lovely neighbour's garden. When DH played ball with DCs he frequently had to go round and ask for the ball he had kicked over!

Returnofjude · 25/08/2025 18:41

Put them outside your home

“free to take”

how are you supposed to know where these random balls came from that have started to appear in your garden 😉

LlynTegid · 25/08/2025 10:47

I think the once a week proposal is reasonable and hopefully will be effective.

SaladAndChipsForTea · 25/08/2025 10:28

I'd throw the ball off my property but not back to them. When they knock just say you've thrown it into the street. Rinse and repeat until the learn it's pointless to knock.

CautiousLurker01 · 25/08/2025 10:26

Tbh I would put a note through their door saying

Further to the repeated intrusive interruptions to my children’s sleep and the need to get on with my day, I will now only return any balls/toys that land in my garden on a Friday evening. Ie once a week. Please encourage your children to try to keep their toys within your garden and refrain from sending them around to ask for them back in the interim. You may wish to invest in a net or screening (easily and cheaply available on Amazon for example) to limit the number of balls you are loosing. I am afraid I will consider ignoring this request and future intrusive demands on my doorstep to be harassment and will have no choice but to report it.

thank you

We used a tunnel net when my kids played cricket and have always happily tossed balls back to the neighbours when we find them (ie at our convenience) and neighbours reciprocated. No pestering, no banging on doors at all hours. No climbing over fences.

nomas · 25/08/2025 10:24

SummerFrog25 · 24/08/2025 20:01

They're 5 &7. You don't think there's a nicer way to deal with it FFS.

Show quote history

The mum is supposedly an adult though, have you missed that? She should be managing her own kids, not relying on OP to throw back balls multiple times a day.

Original poster
feereroo · 25/08/2025 10:03

I don’t see how people say I am being mean.

Prior to the plant pots being up they would scream right outside my living room window on my own drive.
This will occur multiple times a days waking up my toddlers.

The ball is often thrown over multiple times a day amongst other things which could hit my kids if they are playing in the garden.

The clearly have no consideration for others.
It is also concerning that she allows a 5 year old to play unsupervised (he causes the most trouble).

I shouldn’t have to deal with such nuisance on a daily basis hence why we are now moving.

To the PP saying my kids will be like this in a few years time.

No they won’t.
I will teach my kids manners, respect for other people’s property, and to have consideration.

I never used to behave this way as a kid, as in damaging property and trespasssing onto my neighbours property.

I will just ignore the door bell going now and throw it back once a week.

OP posts:
Returnofjude · 24/08/2025 20:07

Yup!

SummerFrog25 · 24/08/2025 20:03

Returnofjude · 24/08/2025 19:57

Naaassty

Show quote history

Clearly

Returnofjude · 24/08/2025 20:03

SummerFrog25 · 24/08/2025 20:01

They're 5 &7. You don't think there's a nicer way to deal with it FFS.

Show quote history

Not if you are naaassty like me there isn’t 😆

SummerFrog25 · 24/08/2025 20:01

FollowSpot · 24/08/2025 11:49

I would look at the kids fiercely and say 'if you knock on my door again after teatime I will puncture every ball hat comes over the fence. Do you understand?'

They're 5 &7. You don't think there's a nicer way to deal with it FFS.

Returnofjude · 24/08/2025 19:57

SummerFrog25 · 24/08/2025 19:53

Kids 5&7

how nasty are you?

Show quote history

Naaassty

SummerFrog25 · 24/08/2025 19:55

PsychoHotSauce · 22/08/2025 15:30

What relationship?!?! Grin

We get balls regularly from an awful entitled neighbour's kid (the kid is ok, the neighbour parent is the entitled one). I just don't bother throwing them back, they just buy new ones and do it again. Must cost them a fortune. I wouldn't puncture them though, somehow that feels kind of cartoon villain like.

Show quote history

Why don't you throw them back? Unlesss you're disabled,it's hardly difficult?!

SummerFrog25 · 24/08/2025 19:53

Returnofjude · 22/08/2025 15:17

Puncture
throw back over

Kids 5&7

how nasty are you?

TheignT · 24/08/2025 19:51

theunbreakablecleopatrajones · 24/08/2025 12:22

Ah yes, she might call the police and then the OP would be in BIG TROUBLE 🚔

Show quote history

Well it is a crime. Do you support criminal behaviour?

softlyfallsthesnow · 24/08/2025 16:59

Returnofjude · 24/08/2025 16:00

And also laughably hyperbolic

You should probably demand that they stop playing outside altogether and just sit silently inside on the iPad with headphones on so you never have to face the hideous ordeal of hearing the laughter of a child.

🙄

Show quote history

It isn't the laughter of a child that's the problem, is it? It's the whacking, full size and weight football that comes flying over the fence within 2 minutes of them starting to kick it. Try having your year old tree smashed by an unguided missile, not to mention other damage they cause, and then tell me it's all a bit of fun.

It's not difficult to find a lightweight ball that's more suitable for gardens, not to mention the skill level of the average child (which is pretty terrible).

Returnofjude · 24/08/2025 16:00

EagerPlayer · 24/08/2025 15:57

How to tell us that you’ve never had daily multiple balls and knocks on door from kids without telling us……🙄

Show quote history

And also laughably hyperbolic

You should probably demand that they stop playing outside altogether and just sit silently inside on the iPad with headphones on so you never have to face the hideous ordeal of hearing the laughter of a child.

🙄

EagerPlayer · 24/08/2025 15:57

wineosaurusrex · 24/08/2025 12:15

Your post is so petty.

So the kids stepped on your drive while playing and looked in your window? Gosh, how traumatic for you. Please tell me they didn't shudders smile at you? Or worse... WAVE?? 🤦‍♀️

And at 5 and 7, they don't have perfect ball control and accidentally knock the ball into your garden occasionally? Have you consideted callingthe police?! This is serious!

You should probably demand that they stop playing outside altogether and just sit silently inside on the iPad with headphones on so you never have to face the hideous ordeal of hearing the laughter of a child.

Even with your meldramatic language (kids "banging" on the door - do you mean knocking?) you're still coming across as incredibly petty.

Just throw the ball back, this is SUCH a non issue. It sounds like you're pissed off with the mum for not being friendly enough and wanting to stir up trouble.

How to tell us that you’ve never had daily multiple balls and knocks on door from kids without telling us……🙄

Clumsycorvid · 24/08/2025 13:27

We ended up not chucking the balls back or answering the door (we would on occasion but not unsociable hours.... the kids actually gave up in the end). Parents would just buy more balls!

EvangelicalAboutButteredToast · 24/08/2025 13:19

My kids lose their balls over neighbours fences and in incredibly grateful when they come back. So I’m going to say chuck them back at your convenience.

Renoonabudget · 24/08/2025 13:16

OP just play the long game, if you think you'll move in the next 4 months just chuck the odd ball back (but no need to rush) obvs stop taking in parcels and taking bin in though if you're not thanked for your trouble. Do whatever you need to, to have the least drama or hassle. But don't go out of your way to help her out. Xx

SirBasil · 24/08/2025 13:14

tell them that you will throw any balls back over once a day at 7pm and that if they ring, the balls will stay in your garden until the next day at 7pm.

Then ignore.
Put a sign on the door for deliveries: no parcels for x neighbour

And hope you can move

Happyholidays78 · 24/08/2025 13:07

My son was the one who would accidentally kick his ball over the fence now & again and my rule was to not knock the door & wait for it to be thrown back over when the neighbours had the chance. We have a parking area which borders several gardens & this worked well (he was the only child in our area).

Pregnancyquestion · 24/08/2025 12:46

Pregnancyquestion · 24/08/2025 12:41

@TenderChicken Yes or their kids are the ones doing it. It’s also going to be an issue when her small children are being pelted by footballs when they play in the garden.

I had students next door and it got to the point I started hiding the balls behind my shed so they couldn’t have them back and couldn’t see them from their upstairs window, threw about 10 back at the end of term but they stopped coming over as much once they realised I had stopped throwing them back anyway

Edited

And to people saying doing stuff like that is miserable and petty…. Oh well. I also reported them for having a massive loud party during lockdown. They hated me lol

Swipe left for the next trending thread