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To feel deflated about DIY kitchen makeover

664 replies

Malahala · 22/08/2025 11:06

We moved into our house almost a year ago. It hadn’t been updated in 40 years, but it’s in a great area, between two outstanding schools, and we managed to get it for £200k less than asking as the seller needed a quick sale. It’s a 4-bed with 2 bathrooms, 2 receptions, a separate kitchen and a utility room. It’s a fantastic investment and I still feel lucky to own it.

The reality is we maxed ourselves out buying it, so there’s no money left for big renovations or an extension. My DH doesn’t like the house — he would have preferred a “done” house — but we couldn’t afford that in this area and didn’t want to move elsewhere. His attitude is that everything should be done by professionals, but we can’t afford that either.

So over the past year I’ve been doing most of the work myself: stripping wallpaper, painting, redecorating etc. Recently I tackled the 40-year-old kitchen. We can’t afford new units, so I added panelling to the cupboard doors and painted them, replaced the cabinet handles, removed the lino as it was damaged, stripped wallpaper, painted the walls and the orange tiles, covered the worst tiles with panelling, and wrapped the worktops in vinyl. It’s not perfect — some of the cupboards don’t hang completely straight and need adjusting — but the difference is huge. Instead of a 40-year-old kitchen, it now looks more like a 10-year-old one.

The problem is DH doesn’t appreciate it. He still says the kitchen looks “old” and can’t see the point of me spending a few hundred pounds making it nicer. He hasn’t lifted a finger to help because he doesn’t do DIY, won’t ask FIL (apparently he will be critical because the panelling on the cabinets isn’t quite right) or his builder friend (friend will likely be “too busy”), so it’s all been left to me. His view is we need a new kitchen/extension, but realistically that’s not happening for at least 5 years. I’d rather make it more liveable now.

What’s making me doubt myself is other people’s reactions. A wealthy friend came round and just said, “so much change!” but not that it looked nice. MIL commented on how hard I’d worked rather than how good it looked. My mum loved it and thought a new tap, sink and dishwasher would make a big difference (and she went straight out and bought all of these for me) but she’s also my mum so not that objective. Now I’m worrying I’ve just “polished a turd” and made the kitchen worse, whereas I genuinely feel it’s a big improvement.

Here are the before and (nearly) after photos. They may take a while to load. Be brutally honest — have I done a decent job for a DIY upgrade, or does it look as bad as DH, friend and MIL seem to think? I’m worried I’m embarrassing myself by being so pleased with my efforts.

YABU - I agree with your DH, friend and MIL
YANBU - It looks nice!

To feel deflated about DIY kitchen makeover
To feel deflated about DIY kitchen makeover
OP posts:
Thread gallery
9
GargoylesofBeelzebub · 22/08/2025 11:51

Oh it’s SOOOO much better! Once the quarry tiles are cleaned up and if you can get a new light fittings it’ll be amazing!

SereneCoralDog · 22/08/2025 11:50

It looks great op and a million times better.

The only thing that jars a bit is the floor - but if you can get all the residue up and get them cleaned up then they'll look great and finish it off.

Well done!

thecomedyofterrors · 22/08/2025 11:49

It looks fantastic! Really really good job. Some people just don’t appreciate ascetics. If you could possibly add a colourful roman blind it would add a lot for little too.

lunaswand · 22/08/2025 11:49

Looks great, a new floor will make all the difference.

£200K below the asking price ?

Jenkibuble · 22/08/2025 11:48

Malahala · 22/08/2025 11:06

We moved into our house almost a year ago. It hadn’t been updated in 40 years, but it’s in a great area, between two outstanding schools, and we managed to get it for £200k less than asking as the seller needed a quick sale. It’s a 4-bed with 2 bathrooms, 2 receptions, a separate kitchen and a utility room. It’s a fantastic investment and I still feel lucky to own it.

The reality is we maxed ourselves out buying it, so there’s no money left for big renovations or an extension. My DH doesn’t like the house — he would have preferred a “done” house — but we couldn’t afford that in this area and didn’t want to move elsewhere. His attitude is that everything should be done by professionals, but we can’t afford that either.

So over the past year I’ve been doing most of the work myself: stripping wallpaper, painting, redecorating etc. Recently I tackled the 40-year-old kitchen. We can’t afford new units, so I added panelling to the cupboard doors and painted them, replaced the cabinet handles, removed the lino as it was damaged, stripped wallpaper, painted the walls and the orange tiles, covered the worst tiles with panelling, and wrapped the worktops in vinyl. It’s not perfect — some of the cupboards don’t hang completely straight and need adjusting — but the difference is huge. Instead of a 40-year-old kitchen, it now looks more like a 10-year-old one.

The problem is DH doesn’t appreciate it. He still says the kitchen looks “old” and can’t see the point of me spending a few hundred pounds making it nicer. He hasn’t lifted a finger to help because he doesn’t do DIY, won’t ask FIL (apparently he will be critical because the panelling on the cabinets isn’t quite right) or his builder friend (friend will likely be “too busy”), so it’s all been left to me. His view is we need a new kitchen/extension, but realistically that’s not happening for at least 5 years. I’d rather make it more liveable now.

What’s making me doubt myself is other people’s reactions. A wealthy friend came round and just said, “so much change!” but not that it looked nice. MIL commented on how hard I’d worked rather than how good it looked. My mum loved it and thought a new tap, sink and dishwasher would make a big difference (and she went straight out and bought all of these for me) but she’s also my mum so not that objective. Now I’m worrying I’ve just “polished a turd” and made the kitchen worse, whereas I genuinely feel it’s a big improvement.

Here are the before and (nearly) after photos. They may take a while to load. Be brutally honest — have I done a decent job for a DIY upgrade, or does it look as bad as DH, friend and MIL seem to think? I’m worried I’m embarrassing myself by being so pleased with my efforts.

YABU - I agree with your DH, friend and MIL
YANBU - It looks nice!

It looks lovely.

Could you broach your MIL about your FIL getting involved without commenting on the panelling etc

My ex was quite like this (not the only reason he is my ex) and would see replacement s the only solution !

beetr00 · 22/08/2025 11:47

@Malahala

It's bloody brilliant, ignore the naysayers.

Some of the cabinets look slightly mis-aligned but that's an easy fix by adjusting your hinges.

Very well done you 🌻

Mercurysinretrograde · 22/08/2025 11:47

It’s a huge improvement. I’d pay a handyman to hang the cupboard doors properly but you have done a fabulous job!

TheLeadbetterLife · 22/08/2025 11:46

Malahala · 22/08/2025 11:44

I would love a new blind. The issue is I would need to drill the fixings in and I don’t have the correct drill for that. A “no drill” blind would work but they are about £140 for that size of window and I’m not sure that’s the best place to spend that money.

I’ve spent days trying to re-hang and straighten the cabinets myself using YouTube but they’re so old I can’t do it. My FIL would definitely be able to do it as he’s hung doors for us before but of course DH doesn’t want to ask him and I actually think a handyman would charge quite a bit as it will be time consuming.

New lighting would be great but would, again, need FIL’s help to fit them.

Balls to your FIL. Hanging cabinets and fitting lights is easy—learn some DIY skills, get a good drill, and show 'em all.

GasPanic · 22/08/2025 11:45

Well what was your husbands solution to the issue ? To whine and do nothing.

It's probably not going to be perfect if you are a first time DIYer. But it's a solution that will work until you can get the money together for a full re-installation. Many people make do with the same.

Yes, you will get some comments from people who like to feel superior and get off on the fact that they have something to look down on. Ignore them.

Maybe if you husband wants a professional job he should pull his finger out and go and earn some more cash to pay for it. In the mean time he will have to make do, in a similar manner to the way just about everyone else does in the world.

Malahala · 22/08/2025 11:44

I would love a new blind. The issue is I would need to drill the fixings in and I don’t have the correct drill for that. A “no drill” blind would work but they are about £140 for that size of window and I’m not sure that’s the best place to spend that money.

I’ve spent days trying to re-hang and straighten the cabinets myself using YouTube but they’re so old I can’t do it. My FIL would definitely be able to do it as he’s hung doors for us before but of course DH doesn’t want to ask him and I actually think a handyman would charge quite a bit as it will be time consuming.

New lighting would be great but would, again, need FIL’s help to fit them.

OP posts:
Merrymouse · 22/08/2025 11:43

It looks great OP.

I think your problem is that some people won't see a difference unless you rip it all out and change the configuration and do an extension.

But that is not your problem.

TheLeadbetterLife · 22/08/2025 11:42

It looks great. I did similar with our 35 year old kitchen—it's far from perfect, but looks so much better, and will do until we can afford / be arsed to replace the cabinets.

I love the quarry tiles, I would keep them.

Needlenardlenoo · 22/08/2025 11:42

It is definitely a big improvement. You are very handy!

What you did is much more environmentally friendly than ripping it all out too. We all need to think more like that.

Itstheshowgirl · 22/08/2025 11:41

It looks lovely OP but you say that your DH hates the house so he probably wouldn’t like anything that you did. He is being a prick about all the work you have done but I think it must be soul destroying living somewhere that you don’t like - why did he agree to buy it if he doesn’t want to do the work?

BeLimeKoala · 22/08/2025 11:41

I clicked the wrong one. I chose YABU as you are way too hard on yourself and have done an amazing job! A bit of fresh Lino and someone to hang the doors a little and perfect, nothing wrong with it! And sorry for not reading your interpretations of YABU etc!

LuckyAnt · 22/08/2025 11:41

The pics aren't close up enough to see the quality of the finish (is that what your husband's problem is with it?), but essentially it looks like you've done an amazing job and I'm fully in admiration for the effort, time and practical ingenuity you've brought to the project.

If it were me, the only thing I might change is maybe the light fittings, as spotlights can make a room feel a bit cold. But basically, I'd be feeling very proud of myself if I'd taken on a project like this and made such an improvement – you definitely deserve more praise than you've received!

jackstini · 22/08/2025 11:41

That is a huge improvement! Really lovely, far nicer

dh needs to apologise and cook you a lovely meal in it!

MujeresLibres · 22/08/2025 11:41

Looks great OP

Truetoself · 22/08/2025 11:40

Great job! (But TBH I think old kitchen is also nice)

EuclidianGeometryFan · 22/08/2025 11:40

So what was your DH doing whilst you were doing all this work?
Did he take on all the routine housework? Cook the meals whilst you were working on the house?
Or is he just a lazy whinger?

What would have been his actual solution? Magic up the money? He gets a second job to pay for the kitchen he wants? Or does he just dump his complaining onto you and expect you to work miracles? Does he think you should have got a second job? Taken out a big loan?
Does he actually come up with positive suggestions or is he one of those people who is just a drain on everyone else?

Sit him down and have it out with him. You should not put up with this.

DiscoBob · 22/08/2025 11:38

It's lovely! Gorgeous. Be very proud of yourself. Maybe it's just that some people aren't very observant?
So it looked a bit boring before, not stand out hideous, so they didn't really pay any attention to how it looked. Now it's better they can't notice because they didn't pay attention before?

BeaLola · 22/08/2025 11:38

I think it looks fab

All I would add is a different light fitting, a plant in windowsill and a blind which I think will finish it

You need a different DH too - you have done wonders

GoodVibesHere · 22/08/2025 11:38

R0ckandHardPlace · 22/08/2025 11:11

It looks so much better! You’ve done a great job.

I do think that the quarry tiles let it down though, and I’d put a blind up on the window to soften it a bit.

This is what I was about to say, a blind will help soften it, and I'd add perhaps a narrow thin rug as the tiles are lettingbit down a bit.

Malahala · 22/08/2025 11:37

Thanks everyone. You’re all making me a bit tearful - it’s taken over a month of finding time at work and at weekends here and there to do it plus 10s of hours spent on YouTube trying to learn how to do stuff. In all that time I haven’t had a single bit of proper praise from anyone (except my mum) and it was really getting me down.

@Daisyvodka i am upset at my DH and we had an argument about it last night (hence my post). But I’m more upset about the fact that he clearly thinks it’s not great and the reason he doesn’t want to ask FIL to help me straighten the cabinets is because he says FIL will criticise my work.

It’s sad I had to ask you all for your opinion but I was starting to feel silly and worrying I’ve developed DIY blindness!

I removed the old lino as it was damaged and they were covering the original quarry tiles. The tiles are also damaged, there’s a lot of newspaper print and glue residue on them. I’m currently researching how to get all of that off and try to get them looking nice without spending a lot of money!

OP posts:
Namechangedagain999 · 22/08/2025 11:36

Looks amazing and original quarry tile floors are so superior to cheap Lino.