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To feel deflated about DIY kitchen makeover

664 replies

Malahala · 22/08/2025 11:06

We moved into our house almost a year ago. It hadn’t been updated in 40 years, but it’s in a great area, between two outstanding schools, and we managed to get it for £200k less than asking as the seller needed a quick sale. It’s a 4-bed with 2 bathrooms, 2 receptions, a separate kitchen and a utility room. It’s a fantastic investment and I still feel lucky to own it.

The reality is we maxed ourselves out buying it, so there’s no money left for big renovations or an extension. My DH doesn’t like the house — he would have preferred a “done” house — but we couldn’t afford that in this area and didn’t want to move elsewhere. His attitude is that everything should be done by professionals, but we can’t afford that either.

So over the past year I’ve been doing most of the work myself: stripping wallpaper, painting, redecorating etc. Recently I tackled the 40-year-old kitchen. We can’t afford new units, so I added panelling to the cupboard doors and painted them, replaced the cabinet handles, removed the lino as it was damaged, stripped wallpaper, painted the walls and the orange tiles, covered the worst tiles with panelling, and wrapped the worktops in vinyl. It’s not perfect — some of the cupboards don’t hang completely straight and need adjusting — but the difference is huge. Instead of a 40-year-old kitchen, it now looks more like a 10-year-old one.

The problem is DH doesn’t appreciate it. He still says the kitchen looks “old” and can’t see the point of me spending a few hundred pounds making it nicer. He hasn’t lifted a finger to help because he doesn’t do DIY, won’t ask FIL (apparently he will be critical because the panelling on the cabinets isn’t quite right) or his builder friend (friend will likely be “too busy”), so it’s all been left to me. His view is we need a new kitchen/extension, but realistically that’s not happening for at least 5 years. I’d rather make it more liveable now.

What’s making me doubt myself is other people’s reactions. A wealthy friend came round and just said, “so much change!” but not that it looked nice. MIL commented on how hard I’d worked rather than how good it looked. My mum loved it and thought a new tap, sink and dishwasher would make a big difference (and she went straight out and bought all of these for me) but she’s also my mum so not that objective. Now I’m worrying I’ve just “polished a turd” and made the kitchen worse, whereas I genuinely feel it’s a big improvement.

Here are the before and (nearly) after photos. They may take a while to load. Be brutally honest — have I done a decent job for a DIY upgrade, or does it look as bad as DH, friend and MIL seem to think? I’m worried I’m embarrassing myself by being so pleased with my efforts.

YABU - I agree with your DH, friend and MIL
YANBU - It looks nice!

To feel deflated about DIY kitchen makeover
To feel deflated about DIY kitchen makeover
OP posts:
Thread gallery
9
Malahala · 25/08/2025 13:16

(photos are “under review” so may take time to load)

OP posts:
Malahala · 25/08/2025 13:15

Thank you all for your encouragement and some great pieces of advice too! I’ve added the cafe curtain - £5.99 rod from Wilko and £24 linen voile from Dunelm I cut to size and hemmed. I’ve also added some decorative touches as suggested. I appreciate the quarry tile is divisive but it’s original to the house and I love it! The suggestion to use sticky stuff remover on the tape and newspaper worked brilliantly and I’m now just waiting for some specialist quarry tile cleaner but in the meantime I’ve put down a rug. I’ve still got the new ceramic sink and tap from my mum that need fitting and the bloody cabinets still need straightening.

A few posters asked why I don’t just ask FIL to help with the cabinets myself. I have to respect DH not wanting to ask him. I would be cross if I told DH not to ask my mum something and he did it anyway.

Anyway, here are a couple of photos of the extra work I’ve done in the last couple of days. Even I can see I have done a decent job!

To feel deflated about DIY kitchen makeover
To feel deflated about DIY kitchen makeover
OP posts:
Millou · 24/08/2025 22:58

You have done a great job! I’d do something to the floor and the lighting and you’ve achieved a lovely homely kitchen with character. Tell the H you don’t appreciate his negativity and if he has nothing positive to say, to not bother saying anything at all!

sabbii · 24/08/2025 17:46

I did the same bought a doer upper in a fantastic and have gradually improved, we finally did the kitchen 8 years after moving in. Concentrated on the loft 1st as we needed bedrooms asap, then decorating the 1st floor before the ground floor. We hope to a small extension and finish the garden landscaping. Everything costs a shed load of money and I have done as much as I can with DIY to save about 20 grand (bricklaying, so much digging, fencing, shelving). Trust me more than anything I would love something ready made.

Ditsyfloral · 24/08/2025 16:43

Looks really good and I know how hard it is to do that, I did the same in mine. Sometimes people can’t say something nice as they are usually surprised that you did a great job. It really does look fab, well done you !

MellersSmellers · 24/08/2025 15:03

Waaay better! Well done you! Especially if you had no help or support!
Even better if you can get rid of the white marks on the floor

Hmwales · 24/08/2025 14:35

Congratulations you've done a fantastic job ~ really well done.

CommonAsMucklowe · 24/08/2025 14:33

That is a wonderful improvement! Well done you because I wouldn't have the wherewithal.

Prettyrosess · 24/08/2025 13:26

Wow! You did all that by yourself? It looks amazing OP! You should be very proud.

theonlygirl · 24/08/2025 12:22

You've done a fantastic job. Your husband is a miserable, lazy, joy sucking, ungrateful mill stone around your neck. I sincerely hope he has other qualities.

Mummof3cuties · 24/08/2025 12:18

I rather like it, much better than before, looks fresher and cleaner. Love the floor, it looks original to the house. Nice little blind for the window and it’s good to go. You SHOULD be proud of yourself and it doesn’t look tatty.

Jmj2207 · 24/08/2025 12:00

You've done a lovely job well done!!

RoseAlone · 24/08/2025 11:28

I visit people's houses as part of my job and to be honest I've seen much worse kitchens that have cost oodles of money!

You've done an amazing job so don't listen to grumpy hubby or anyone else. It looks fab and you should be very proud of yourself!

Nothing7 · 24/08/2025 10:51

It looks fantastic! Your husband is being completely ungrateful.
I did similar to mine albeit mine was already shaker style. Hubby really didn’t want me to paint the cabinets but was so chuffed with the way they turned out and went and bought a composite sink and taps so we could complete the look. Still need to do the floor but the transformation, as with yours was huge
well done! And the panelling looks great

dazzlingdeborahrose · 24/08/2025 10:28

You’ve done a brilliant job. It looks ten times better. Definitely ask your FIL to come and give you a hand with the doors etc. as someone said, your ‘D’H knows he’s going to catch some harsh words from FIL about his lazy childish behaviour. The terracotta tiles could look great once cleaned up and restored but I suspect you’re looking for a lighter more contemporary look so lino or stick on tiles. Well bloody done!! You should be immensely proud of what you’ve achieved. As for the man child? Ignore ignore ignore.

DangerousAlchemy · 24/08/2025 09:53

Malahala · 22/08/2025 11:44

I would love a new blind. The issue is I would need to drill the fixings in and I don’t have the correct drill for that. A “no drill” blind would work but they are about £140 for that size of window and I’m not sure that’s the best place to spend that money.

I’ve spent days trying to re-hang and straighten the cabinets myself using YouTube but they’re so old I can’t do it. My FIL would definitely be able to do it as he’s hung doors for us before but of course DH doesn’t want to ask him and I actually think a handyman would charge quite a bit as it will be time consuming.

New lighting would be great but would, again, need FIL’s help to fit them.

You've done a fab job on your own. Well done 👏🎂 can you contact your FIL yourself and ask for a bit of help? That's what I'd do.

MoonWoman69 · 24/08/2025 09:51

Well I'd be happy with you coming round and giving mine a makeover! You've done an absolutely cracking job on that! Be proud of yourself and what you've accomplished all by yourself!
Honestly OP, it looks brilliant! 👏🏻💐

Deathinvegas · 24/08/2025 09:06

Malahala · 22/08/2025 11:37

Thanks everyone. You’re all making me a bit tearful - it’s taken over a month of finding time at work and at weekends here and there to do it plus 10s of hours spent on YouTube trying to learn how to do stuff. In all that time I haven’t had a single bit of proper praise from anyone (except my mum) and it was really getting me down.

@Daisyvodka i am upset at my DH and we had an argument about it last night (hence my post). But I’m more upset about the fact that he clearly thinks it’s not great and the reason he doesn’t want to ask FIL to help me straighten the cabinets is because he says FIL will criticise my work.

It’s sad I had to ask you all for your opinion but I was starting to feel silly and worrying I’ve developed DIY blindness!

I removed the old lino as it was damaged and they were covering the original quarry tiles. The tiles are also damaged, there’s a lot of newspaper print and glue residue on them. I’m currently researching how to get all of that off and try to get them looking nice without spending a lot of money!

Just read your updates about the tiles it’s a shame they’re damaged, i love that style of tile!

Deathinvegas · 24/08/2025 08:58

Malahala · 22/08/2025 11:06

We moved into our house almost a year ago. It hadn’t been updated in 40 years, but it’s in a great area, between two outstanding schools, and we managed to get it for £200k less than asking as the seller needed a quick sale. It’s a 4-bed with 2 bathrooms, 2 receptions, a separate kitchen and a utility room. It’s a fantastic investment and I still feel lucky to own it.

The reality is we maxed ourselves out buying it, so there’s no money left for big renovations or an extension. My DH doesn’t like the house — he would have preferred a “done” house — but we couldn’t afford that in this area and didn’t want to move elsewhere. His attitude is that everything should be done by professionals, but we can’t afford that either.

So over the past year I’ve been doing most of the work myself: stripping wallpaper, painting, redecorating etc. Recently I tackled the 40-year-old kitchen. We can’t afford new units, so I added panelling to the cupboard doors and painted them, replaced the cabinet handles, removed the lino as it was damaged, stripped wallpaper, painted the walls and the orange tiles, covered the worst tiles with panelling, and wrapped the worktops in vinyl. It’s not perfect — some of the cupboards don’t hang completely straight and need adjusting — but the difference is huge. Instead of a 40-year-old kitchen, it now looks more like a 10-year-old one.

The problem is DH doesn’t appreciate it. He still says the kitchen looks “old” and can’t see the point of me spending a few hundred pounds making it nicer. He hasn’t lifted a finger to help because he doesn’t do DIY, won’t ask FIL (apparently he will be critical because the panelling on the cabinets isn’t quite right) or his builder friend (friend will likely be “too busy”), so it’s all been left to me. His view is we need a new kitchen/extension, but realistically that’s not happening for at least 5 years. I’d rather make it more liveable now.

What’s making me doubt myself is other people’s reactions. A wealthy friend came round and just said, “so much change!” but not that it looked nice. MIL commented on how hard I’d worked rather than how good it looked. My mum loved it and thought a new tap, sink and dishwasher would make a big difference (and she went straight out and bought all of these for me) but she’s also my mum so not that objective. Now I’m worrying I’ve just “polished a turd” and made the kitchen worse, whereas I genuinely feel it’s a big improvement.

Here are the before and (nearly) after photos. They may take a while to load. Be brutally honest — have I done a decent job for a DIY upgrade, or does it look as bad as DH, friend and MIL seem to think? I’m worried I’m embarrassing myself by being so pleased with my efforts.

YABU - I agree with your DH, friend and MIL
YANBU - It looks nice!

Yes, it looks better except the floor that doesn’t seem to have worked too well but it’s cheap and temporary so that doesn’t really matter.
I’ve had the same debate in my house I started out thinking like your DH but we moved a wall so i was forced to do some decorating and after seeing the transformative effect of just a lick paint I’m a convert to your way of thinking.
Tbh my DH just leaves me to it, if i want to do it i do it, if I don’t I don’t.

Julimia · 24/08/2025 08:57

Your makeover looks fab . Be pleased with your efforts and take no notice of anyone else. Keep going with the DIY.
I have to say though I find it difficult to understand how someone not able or willing to take on a do up project would get into this...DH. He is possibly a teeny bit jealous/envious of your obvious skills and positivity too.
.

Pipsquiggle · 24/08/2025 07:54

Just a shame he can't get onboard with this house. He seems not to have learnt anything from your last new build house where you lost money.

This is exactly how people make wealth in the long term - buy the worst house on the best street.

You are doing really well OP. Shame your DH doesn't appreciate your hard work.

NuovaPilbeam · 24/08/2025 07:21

It does look better but i know what DH means, sometimes its almost irritating to spend money when you can't get what you want from it. I'd also say what can look better in a photo can look like a very obvious bodge job close up. Can you post close ups of the painted tiles, door panels etc?

Out of interest what was wrong with the countertops before? You didn't cover marble or granite with wood effect vinyl did you??

LoopyLil82 · 24/08/2025 07:16

Wow that looks so much better.
I just cannot believe your hubby let you do that all on your own and now makes snippy comments. What an absolute arse!
You should be so proud of yourself x

MrsDoubtfire123 · 24/08/2025 06:34

Looks great OP! You should be proud.

Gremlinsateit · 24/08/2025 06:00

Brilliant job @Malahala . If you put that rug over the quarry tiles, I think you don’t have to do anything else.

I am trying to summon up the courage to do something similar to my horrible kitchen. How did you find the vinyl wrap for the benches? Was it easy enough to apply, and does it seem robust enough for benches?