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To feel deflated about DIY kitchen makeover

664 replies

Malahala · 22/08/2025 11:06

We moved into our house almost a year ago. It hadn’t been updated in 40 years, but it’s in a great area, between two outstanding schools, and we managed to get it for £200k less than asking as the seller needed a quick sale. It’s a 4-bed with 2 bathrooms, 2 receptions, a separate kitchen and a utility room. It’s a fantastic investment and I still feel lucky to own it.

The reality is we maxed ourselves out buying it, so there’s no money left for big renovations or an extension. My DH doesn’t like the house — he would have preferred a “done” house — but we couldn’t afford that in this area and didn’t want to move elsewhere. His attitude is that everything should be done by professionals, but we can’t afford that either.

So over the past year I’ve been doing most of the work myself: stripping wallpaper, painting, redecorating etc. Recently I tackled the 40-year-old kitchen. We can’t afford new units, so I added panelling to the cupboard doors and painted them, replaced the cabinet handles, removed the lino as it was damaged, stripped wallpaper, painted the walls and the orange tiles, covered the worst tiles with panelling, and wrapped the worktops in vinyl. It’s not perfect — some of the cupboards don’t hang completely straight and need adjusting — but the difference is huge. Instead of a 40-year-old kitchen, it now looks more like a 10-year-old one.

The problem is DH doesn’t appreciate it. He still says the kitchen looks “old” and can’t see the point of me spending a few hundred pounds making it nicer. He hasn’t lifted a finger to help because he doesn’t do DIY, won’t ask FIL (apparently he will be critical because the panelling on the cabinets isn’t quite right) or his builder friend (friend will likely be “too busy”), so it’s all been left to me. His view is we need a new kitchen/extension, but realistically that’s not happening for at least 5 years. I’d rather make it more liveable now.

What’s making me doubt myself is other people’s reactions. A wealthy friend came round and just said, “so much change!” but not that it looked nice. MIL commented on how hard I’d worked rather than how good it looked. My mum loved it and thought a new tap, sink and dishwasher would make a big difference (and she went straight out and bought all of these for me) but she’s also my mum so not that objective. Now I’m worrying I’ve just “polished a turd” and made the kitchen worse, whereas I genuinely feel it’s a big improvement.

Here are the before and (nearly) after photos. They may take a while to load. Be brutally honest — have I done a decent job for a DIY upgrade, or does it look as bad as DH, friend and MIL seem to think? I’m worried I’m embarrassing myself by being so pleased with my efforts.

YABU - I agree with your DH, friend and MIL
YANBU - It looks nice!

To feel deflated about DIY kitchen makeover
To feel deflated about DIY kitchen makeover
OP posts:
Thread gallery
9
Northernparent68 · 22/08/2025 18:36

In fairness to your husband, he doesn’t like the house, ie you wanted to buy it, he doesn’t like DIY, but you insisted, and you expect him to be enthusiastic

PiriPiriMenopause · 22/08/2025 18:05

Pressed the wrong option. 🙄

YANBU! You’ve done a really good job.

Kellph83 · 22/08/2025 18:05

Looks great! You just need a bright flooring and it’ll be even better

BitterAndTwistedClub · 22/08/2025 18:00

You should be very proud of yourself. It looks great.

Ohjakestopbeingatwat · 22/08/2025 17:55

I think you’ve done a bloody fantastic job!

We did similar with ours when we moved in 4 years ago. Thankfully, it’s all getting ripped out next month.

NoNotTodayThanks · 22/08/2025 17:53

I think it looks lovely, you've done a great job!

We bought a fixer upper and haven't gotten around to doing the kitchen yet but I did similar to you and painted the cupboards, changed tap, changed handles etc. it's not perfect but it's definitely given the kitchen a face lift.

Thingyfanding · 22/08/2025 17:50

You’ll stop caring soon. I like the quarry tiles but a larger rug over the top would look nice and a new blind.
You should be proud of yourself!

Trsnsn353 · 22/08/2025 17:49

Also I think it’s nuts the way people blow££££ continually on home renovations. It’s bad for the environment and finances. No idea how so many afford it. Can only assume it’s on credit or interest free mortgages. It makes houses look so bland and characterless when everything just gets ripped out. Far better to try and use, fix what you’ve got for as long as you can, save and then really appreciate when you get bigger jobs done professionally.

Alsonification · 22/08/2025 17:48

Wow!!!! It looks amazing. I tried to do the same in house I used to live it but it didn’t come out half as good as yours. Very well done!!!

Lulu1919 · 22/08/2025 17:47

So much better ...you've done a fab job
Enjoy it and ignore everyone else !!!

isitme111 · 22/08/2025 17:47

It looks lovely I especially love the floor.

Trsnsn353 · 22/08/2025 17:44

I think it looks amazing. Some nice flooring, plants and maybe a really nice pendant light would bring it all together.

I’ve just had a new kitchen after a 20 year wait and I prefer the less perfect , homely old and new look. Pristine does not do it for me. Kitchens are meant to be the heart of the house which is difficult when they’re cold and perfect.

Sunbeam01 · 22/08/2025 17:43

justasking111 · 22/08/2025 17:36

When did. DIY become a dirty word. We had the readers digest DIY book back in the day. Today you have you tube. We did all our house DIY. I made all the curtains, cushion covers, maternity clothes, babies outfits. No-one blinked when we spent evenings and weekends, sanding, undercoating, glossing woodwork. Hung wallpaper. Made duvet sets. Now you have to get someone in.

I don't see it as a dirty word. However there are a lot of people who try and do things themselves with no patience or attention to detail.

As with most things in life - you get the good and the bad.

250mlmax · 22/08/2025 17:43

Honestly, I think people on this thread are being far too polite about your husband.

He sounds like a thundering dickhead with the emotional maturity of a toddler. From what you've written of him, it doesn't sound like he has a single redeeming feature. And his family sound just as bad. I hope he is the next thing you choose to upcycle.

On to the point of the thread - I really can't believe you've managed to achieve all that just by yourself. I could never in a million years. Even if I change a lightbulb I somehow fuck it up. Congratulations and really well done OP. It looks so much better.

I understand the Marmite response to the floor. We discovered the same floor underneath our lino when we had our kitchen done a few years ago. The tiles themselves are lovely and we really wanted to make them work, but they just seemed to suck the light out of the room and the colour just didn't really 'go' with anything. (We put down fishbone wood flooring in the end but that's irrelevant since you're on a budget.)

With a final few touches it will be looking absolutely lovely and you can get a good few more years out of it.

I hate your DH for pissing all over your wonderful efforts.

AbzMoz · 22/08/2025 17:42

OP you’ve done an AMAZING job. I’d be pissed off if DH had nothing helpful to say and had done naff all to improve it too. I’m so pleased you’ve found a chorus of support for your efforts here - and I hope it echoes in your ear next time you get a less than helpful reply from DH or his parents.

Pearl69 · 22/08/2025 17:41

justasking111 · 22/08/2025 17:36

When did. DIY become a dirty word. We had the readers digest DIY book back in the day. Today you have you tube. We did all our house DIY. I made all the curtains, cushion covers, maternity clothes, babies outfits. No-one blinked when we spent evenings and weekends, sanding, undercoating, glossing woodwork. Hung wallpaper. Made duvet sets. Now you have to get someone in.

All those diy skills are being lost - and not all “professionals” do that great a job. I’m the diyer in my house as I did up two houses before I met DH so I learned a few skills along the way. DH doesn’t do the prep properly which drives me insane and just isn’t that interested.

Sunbeam01 · 22/08/2025 17:40

I feel you OP. I did this with our old Gally kitchen before we had our extension (which I'm now sitting in). I still hated it but that was mainly due to the poor workmanship of the original kitchen which was 'handmade' by a DIY 'enthusiast'.

Your kitchen looks great and certainly a huge improvement and well worth doing rather than living with the before for 5 years.

ErlingHaalandsManBun · 22/08/2025 17:39

Oh its lovely!

I agree with PP though in that I would get some lino. New if you can afford it but off cuts if not. Just to sort that area out. And some nice greenery on the windowsill, fake or otherwise, will just finish the look.

But you have done a really good job.

Your DH is just being a whiney baby because you can't afford the extension he wants just yet so is being a sulky dickhead. Hopefully he will come to appreciate your efforts.

MimiSunshine · 22/08/2025 17:38

You’ve done a great job OP.

Do you need a blind for privacy or just something to dress the windows? If the later I’d try to get a shower curtain rod, long enough, a tension one. Then buy some nice voile fabric that could be hung sideways across the window and all you need is some wonderweb tape to create a pocket for you to slide the rod through.

then you can put it at full height or cafe height, you can also buy ‘cafe’ length voiles.

speak to FIL yourself and tell DH to stop sulking and spoiling things. It’s deeply unattractive

NeverCouldGetTheHangOfThursdays · 22/08/2025 17:38

Just adding my tuppence worth... I love it! You've done a brilliant job and your husband is an arse.

Pearl69 · 22/08/2025 17:37

Gosh, well done OP, that’s quite a project. We appreciate your efforts even if your DH doesn’t. Miserable sod.

justasking111 · 22/08/2025 17:36

When did. DIY become a dirty word. We had the readers digest DIY book back in the day. Today you have you tube. We did all our house DIY. I made all the curtains, cushion covers, maternity clothes, babies outfits. No-one blinked when we spent evenings and weekends, sanding, undercoating, glossing woodwork. Hung wallpaper. Made duvet sets. Now you have to get someone in.

Ketzele · 22/08/2025 17:34

I'm over 60 and have never had a new kitchen or a box fresh house. But I have had great joy from polishing turds, and seeing shabby rooms slowly becoming beautiful on a tight budget. You have done a great job here, and your husband is being ridiculous (and ungrateful). House renovations are hugely expensive right now, you have absolutely done the right thing.

Washingupdone · 22/08/2025 17:32

Great job 👏 Congratulations. I love the quarry tiles, good solid ones, just polish them like I used to do 53 years ago they will come up a treat.

Didimum · 22/08/2025 17:32

I think you're letting other people have far too much power over your feelings, OP. Who cares what they think? It's your kitchen. Your DH probably won't ever be happy because what he thinks about the house is set.

Tile Doctor products for the quarry tiles.