To be shocked women still try to stop aging?

Agree.

I was on holiday recently and the younger women on the plane with those awful lips. That's an example of something that's trendy in some women and doesn't make them look younger, just duck like. The side profile is unreal. Botox and fillers is seen everywhere on social media so perhaps women who have lower self esteem think they must join in regardless.

True feminism is doing what the fuck you want... without being judged by other women.
Do what you want and stop judging others.

Men try and look after their skin and hair too 🤷‍♀️

You only have to look at older actresses who have tried to hold off ageing by any means to know it doesn't work. Facelifts injectables etc just make you look like someone who's had a facelift and/or injectables. All the creams in the world won't hold back time. You might look good but you'll still look mature/old/aged.

I was about to make a similar point - women want to look younger (and more attractive) because generally you are treated a lot better - if ppl didn’t judge ppl’s outward appearance it obv wouldn’t be as big a thing. Also, for women looking for partners, the vast majority of men are looks-driven so to even stand a chance in the dating pool women will feel they have to present their ‘best selves’.

There’s countless threads saying how attractive women will be with less attractive but funny/ kind/ sensitive/ intelligent men - with most men appearance is the primary factor and you don’t often see as many attractive men at the beginning of relationships with drastically less attractive women. You just don’t.

Obv ppl will always want to look their best for themselves, but how you’re treated by others and the opportunities that brings will always be a huge factor of the decisions ppl make.

How old are you, OP?

Fillers aren't dangerous. What's dangerous is people going to dodgy practitioners and anyone who uses unlicensed prescribers.
I'd get a fair bit done, if I had the money. A lot can be done with non invasive treatments these days, but a course for many is at least £600. I am about to spend £250 on my eyebrows and I'm having to rethink my hair colouring, though. There's still places I want to visit and luckily I'm not in the workplace, so ageism doesn't feature in my life, except in a positive way (as in getting treated kindly going through airports and getting a seat).
A life of keeping out of the sun and in shade of an afternoon, isn't a life well lived and more extreme than injectables. A pp mentioned her skin because she couldn't go in the sun, but to everyone else you are still a, near 60 year old woman, so it's of no personal benefit, although I realise the sun dodging was medical. It's considered abhorrent on here, but it serves post menopausal women well, if they are slightly overweight, do weights and eat those calories.

Why is it always ‘the patriarchy’.
we are all aging and the end result of aging is dying. Is it really not in most people’s natural instincts to want to look if not be younger as it is an emotional pulling away from the inevitablity of death. Not to attract men’s gaze.
humans have always wanted to live longer. To avoid the decline of old age. Not because they want to look pretty but because we don’t want to die. Aging is a reminder we are heading ever closer to death.

There does always seem to be an underlying tone on these threads that if you don’t do Botox, fillers, eyelashes and lips then you are a frump and have a mono brow.

It’s not necessarily true.

What else do you do to maintain your youth?

How much water do you drink? What food do you eat? What are exercise do you do? What skin care routine have you got?

Someone who does all this is doing a better job of investing in themselves and looking younger.

I'm 66.
I invest a lot in keeping healthy as I see relatives and friends who struggle with mobility, are on medication and are old before their time. I spend money on the gym, pilates, a PT, regular facials and massages.
I certainly don't look 66. I have good skin, good teeth and a positive attitude despite a shit year including my ds's suicide. I'd never have invasive procedures...I had some milia removed last week but that's about it.
I have hair every 5 weeks and regular gel nails ...because I can. Not because my dh expects it.

"Special Snowflakes". How delightful. Your post is clearly intended to be inflammatory.

I'm 61 and very happy to be an outlier. I've never followed the crowd so why would I start now?

I prefer to spend my money on good clothes, books and art. I worry far more about Alzheimers (due to my family history) than I do about whether I look young. I eat well, stay out of the sun and keep active.

I do commit one cardinal sin though; I have hair long enough to sit on. No vanity about it, just embracing my inner witch.

And yessss, I'm sure there are a bunch of special snowflakes here who always resisted

You're implying that it's a small minority of women who don't do botox and other tweakments etc but actually it's the majority. You just don't notice them.

I think you should consider why you don't notice those women, they're all around you.

I like making the most of what I've got.

You could be "shocked" that we paint our perfectly fine natural nails. I do it because it looks nice (to me), I enjoy it and it makes me feel good.

I also feel like early 40s is a weird 'shoulder/transitional' age. I follow some ladies on YouTube who are 70, and have faces full of wrinkles, but are still really trendy and pretty, and I think they look fantastic and I would kill to look like them at that age. But, in my early 40s, I'm not ready to embrace the ageing process just yet, although I'm accepting that it has definitely begun.

I also think women are endlessly being told what to do / what not to do. Berrating us for trying to look younger / fresher is just one more thing to add to the list of things we're doing wrong!

I never thought I’d go down this route but I have some very glamorous, natural looking friends in their 50s and I discovered they all have Botox. No pumped lips just younger looking. I’ve told dh i plan to go that route. Wouldn’t have surgery though. I also like having my nails and hair done. I don’t really want to have a wrinkly face until I’m 60 so I’ll hold it off. Not doing it for men, it’s about how I feel.

Have you seen the recent stuff that is coming out about fillers though? They're dangerous!

IF they were completely safe, although I'd not want them myself, I'd think 'Crack on, each to their own.' But to take those risks with your health and life? Just for the sake of knocking 5 years off your visual appearance? It's the equivalent of using arsenic in face powder 150 years ago.

Christ im having a bad week. Just about to take my 48 year old self to the gym. Im on weight loss injections. I'm having my hair highlighted next week and brows waxed. Week after im going to a spa as an end of work treat to myself.
None of this is due to anything other than what I want to do!
An obese, in pain sad person was who I've been until I've taken my physical health in hand. Fuck the patriarchy. Hair, botox whatever I do...because I like it and I'm vain..... and I can!

Exactly. Of course they can work if done well. Countless examples of that.

This just isn't true though, is it? Well-done botox/fillers really do change a persons appearance and make them look younger. People who don't like this sort of thing always deny that it works but when you compare someone who has regularly had botox to someone who hasn't, the results speak for themselves.

Injecting fillers is positive?

Botox (botulism)?

Surgery is positive?

Implants are positive?

I can understand stuff like make-up, hair dye, nice clothes. Non-extreme. No danger. No risk.

There are degrees. If you're taking physical risks to life or limb, that isn't a positive thing. I completely accept (100%) the right of the individual to do those things at the same time as thinking they're not sensible choices.

Totally agree. Come back in a hundred years, or a thousand. It will be the same.

What’s your stance on HRT op?

Op you are ‘shocked’? Really?

I think it’s normal human behaviour. Oh. And men do it too! Not exclusive to women at all

So those who resist are the snowflakes? Eh, you've got that metaphor the wrong way round. Failure to resist social pressure, giving into it is the weakness. Not standing against it.

Yeah I sure spend a lot on products for someone who doesn't care. It's hard wired and supercharged by culture and capitalism.

And yessss, I'm sure there are a bunch of special snowflakes here who always resisted. Gold star for you. Yet, there is a whole industry built on this so you're just outliers (but good job!!!!!!)

Some of us are just naturally youthful looking. We just can't help it, sorry.