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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think you should eat outside in summer

189 replies

Sneezeseverytimeheeatsabounty · 20/08/2025 14:53

We live abroad and are on holidays this month.
Dh tends to do a bbq most days for lunch.
Each time he wants to eat inside as thinks there’s too many flies outside (there aren’t) or some other excuse. Dd follows him and they end up sat indoors eating lunch watching tv on a lovely summers day.
I end up sat outside eating lunch on my own
We have a nice seating area by the garden and pool with large parasol for shade
We have all autumn/winter where we’ll have to be sat inside eating

Aibu to want to sit and eat lunch outside as a family on our summer holidays?

OP posts:
godmum56 · 20/08/2025 20:26

Wiltingasparagusfern · 20/08/2025 20:25

I agree with you OP! I would find it a bit of a turn off actually. It just seems a bit, I dunno, uptight and unfun to be so opposed to eating outside. I’m genuinely shocked by all the people on here who don’t do it. What do they do all summer? Do they ever have picnics? Have a meal on a restaurant terrace? Attend a BBQ? Feel the sheer joy of eating a punnet of strawberries under a tree? Have a beer on their front step? Do they all live in the Hebrides? I’m usually pretty good at understanding that everyone lives differently but this has shocked me!

you do you.

Wiltingasparagusfern · 20/08/2025 20:25

I agree with you OP! I would find it a bit of a turn off actually. It just seems a bit, I dunno, uptight and unfun to be so opposed to eating outside. I’m genuinely shocked by all the people on here who don’t do it. What do they do all summer? Do they ever have picnics? Have a meal on a restaurant terrace? Attend a BBQ? Feel the sheer joy of eating a punnet of strawberries under a tree? Have a beer on their front step? Do they all live in the Hebrides? I’m usually pretty good at understanding that everyone lives differently but this has shocked me!

PersephonePomegranate · 20/08/2025 20:25

Sneezeseverytimeheeatsabounty · 20/08/2025 20:01

Well no, me neither sometimes and I do what you say the majority of the year indoors, but since we’re all on holiday and have a great opportunity to enjoy summer, why wouldn’t you?
It seems to be such a British thing, so many other countries eat outside on a regular basis and don’t complain about wasps & flies

Show quote history

Oh, so now it's a British issue? I wonder why all the pubs that have beer gardens and restaurants with outside space are always rammed at the first hint of sunshine?

Are you on a wind up, OP?

MrsTerryPratchett · 20/08/2025 20:25

My mum makes me when I’m home.

I can’t stand it. Hot, insects everywhere, crap gets in the food. HATE IT. I’ll eat indoors and have a lovely drink to see the beach, sunset, whatever.

Reallyneedsaholiday · 20/08/2025 20:19

Sneezeseverytimeheeatsabounty · 20/08/2025 15:04

But wouldn’t it be nice if we all ate together?

Show quote history

So why dont you eat inside with them?

WhineAndWine1 · 20/08/2025 20:17

i don’t get this need what when it’s nice outside everyone needs to be outside

Doggymummar · 20/08/2025 20:06

I can just about manage a coffee outside but I wouldn't like eating outside. Not even on holiday it's too cold. But I live in the UK

mummybear35 · 20/08/2025 20:04

I’m with your husband…not because I dislike eating outside but where we live, horseflies are active from June onwards till Sept…they love me and when bitten, I react severely often ending up with cellulitis and needing antibiotics!! Wish we’d known about the horseflies before we bought this house but I figured, it’s only a few months of the year and the rest of the year, I’m happy as its a beautiful house in the middle of nowhere surrounded by woods and paddocks etc.

EvenMoreCrisps · 20/08/2025 20:01

all the gardens are full of families Bbq-ing, chatting sat around together

There's nothing appealing about this.
Insects, fumes from multiple barbecues and the noise of loads of people blabbering on.

Original poster
Sneezeseverytimeheeatsabounty · 20/08/2025 20:01

Cucy · 20/08/2025 19:50

YABU

Your wishes don’t trump everyone else’s and if you want to eat as a family then you need to go inside to eat.

Most of the time I really enjoy eating outside but some days I just can’t deal with it.

Theres nothing I love more than eating in front of the TV though, it really helps me decompress from the day. And I don’t like talking when eating much either, especially the evening meal when I’m tired, so it’s nice to sit quietly and just watch Tv and eat.

It soubds as though you want to sit outside as a family and chat, which is something I don’t always want to do.

Well no, me neither sometimes and I do what you say the majority of the year indoors, but since we’re all on holiday and have a great opportunity to enjoy summer, why wouldn’t you?
It seems to be such a British thing, so many other countries eat outside on a regular basis and don’t complain about wasps & flies

OP posts:
AlwaysPerplexed · 20/08/2025 20:00

I live in sw france and have had family here for the last 12 days . One way of keeping sane was to herd everyone out for breakfast, lunch and dinner (30 meals!). It kept my house a little cleaner than it would have been, the 3 year old could wander around without stress, and the meals were far more relaxed.

Yes there were a few wasps, but we made traps for them and had a few swatters and it was irritating forgetting the salt etc etc but it saved my sanity (the family was my husband's).

I know it is a different situation than yours, and in fact when we don't have guests, it can be too much of a faff, but you could try negotiating- and build some wasp/fly traps.

greengreyblue · 20/08/2025 20:00

Mh67 · 20/08/2025 19:52

I hate eating outdoors. It hot and uncomfortable.

What if it’s warm and comfortable?

PersephonePomegranate · 20/08/2025 19:59

Sneezeseverytimeheeatsabounty · 20/08/2025 15:04

But wouldn’t it be nice if we all ate together?

Show quote history

Yes it would, go inside and eat with them!

Why 'should' they eat outside? There's no right or wrong here, but you're insinuating there is.

Mh67 · 20/08/2025 19:52

I hate eating outdoors. It hot and uncomfortable.

Confusdworriedmum · 20/08/2025 19:52

Zanzara · 20/08/2025 14:59

I have a house in Spain. If you barbecue food - and especially meat - outside, you are going to attract flies. 🤷‍♀️

My parents used to have a house in France. BBQ moss days, never had an issue with flies, wasps etc.
I love eating outside in the summer but no-one else does really. Let them waste the summer inside if they want and you enjoy being outside.

TowerRavenSeven · 20/08/2025 19:51

I think adults should eat where they want.

greengreyblue · 20/08/2025 19:51

I’m amazed at all those who dislike it. The outdoor spaces at pubs and restaurants have been rammed so obviously a minority view.

Timeforabitofpeace · 20/08/2025 19:50

There’s no “should “ about it. It’s your personal opinion.

Cucy · 20/08/2025 19:50

YABU

Your wishes don’t trump everyone else’s and if you want to eat as a family then you need to go inside to eat.

Most of the time I really enjoy eating outside but some days I just can’t deal with it.

Theres nothing I love more than eating in front of the TV though, it really helps me decompress from the day. And I don’t like talking when eating much either, especially the evening meal when I’m tired, so it’s nice to sit quietly and just watch Tv and eat.

It soubds as though you want to sit outside as a family and chat, which is something I don’t always want to do.

greengreyblue · 20/08/2025 19:49

I like to eat outside if we have shade and we’re not pestered by wasps and flies. I know what you mean about it being a shame and then the family not eating together. Did you know this about him before ? I think it would’ve put me off if I had a lifetime of not enjoying summer holidays!

MyRootinTootinBaby · 20/08/2025 19:44

I hate eating outside. Everything feels dirty. I hate any breeze while I’m eating that may have bits drift towards my food, and I don’t want any bugs or birds near me. I don’t feel relaxed thinking things may land on my plate.

SirBasil · 20/08/2025 19:30

Sneezeseverytimeheeatsabounty · 20/08/2025 15:04

But wouldn’t it be nice if we all ate together?

Show quote history

eat. inside. with. them.

easy

SirBasil · 20/08/2025 19:29

so you eat outside, you stay on the beach and you don't tell him to do something he doesn't want to.

I loathe eating outside and do it as little as possible.

MuffinsAreJustCakesAtBreakfast · 20/08/2025 19:27

We need a new board on mumsnet.

Not AIBU but PVMO (please validate my opinion)

Toomanywaterbottles · 20/08/2025 19:16

I hate eating outside, no matter if it’s a lovely day. I hate barbecues too.