To expect aggressive dogs to be secured prior to visit?

YABU but because I wouldn't go to a place with an aggressive dog and a young child.

I wouldn't expect them to do anything because I wouldn't go to their property.

Weightloss12 I adore dogs but (on my 3rd dog now would not like this!) Labs are big dogs, and my friends lab used to pin my Son against the wall when he was small .They used to come here in the end minus pooch! As far as OP goes no way would I set foot in there myself let alone let my child go.

My ds was bitten through to the bone by a family member's dog. He developed an infection and required hospital treatment (broad spectrum antibiotics for a week).

When ds was treated in A&E, the hospital administrator reported the attack to the police. Automatic notification has become necessary in our county because so many dog owners are completely irresponsible, dogs are so poorly trained and too many children are being bitten.

Ds' family member was contacted by the police and told if there was a second attack, the dog could be removed and destroyed.

I suggest you explain this to your PILs because they are putting their precious dogs at risk, as well as your far more precious child.

I refused to allow ds to go there again. It stopped the argument.

Dog lover here. This is a stressful situation for all concerned. I’d not visit them at home anymore and suggest meeting for a day out.

We've had a similar situation with DHs parents. They have a very large, powerful, aggressive dog who has growled and snapped at our DC before. We told them in no uncertain terms that we would only visit them if the dog was put away. They refuse, so now we don't visit with DC anymore. It has caused many arguments and there's a bit of rift now, but our DCs safety comes first.

YABU to continue visiting knowing that the dog is aggressive.

100% agree with @GreyCarpet

I voted YABU because you are knowingly putting your daughter in danger every time you go and yet you continue to go.

No, we're not coming because of the dogs.

That's all you need to say.

If anything happened, you would be culpable because you are choosing to take that risk. Yes, they should secure the dogs but they don't so 🤷🏻‍♀️

Just seen your update, well done. Now you need to take some time to reflect on your phenomenally poor boundaries up until this point.

Why on earth are you going? Those dogs could kill your child.

You just don't go there

I have a dog who is put into the utility room when we have nervous visitors as he’s a very big dog and I don't want my visitors to feel uncomfortable.

Agree, @PluckyChancer. What I learned about dogs growing up was from the working dogs that older members of my family (long gone now) used to own. Beautiful creatures, but secured in their own farm building during family visits. My Great Aunt said it was for the dogs' safety ...

Anyway, the lesson I learned was that you never take on a dog - and indeed it is cruel to do so - unless you have the time and the space to train them properly, house them properly, and segregate them properly.

I never, ever saw a loose dog out on the street growling at people until I came to England to live. It's bloody scary.

Well done, OP, for finding your steel.

I think YABU because you’re relying on someone else to ensure your DD’s safety when they’ve already proven themselves completely unreliable.

In your shoes, I’d simply refuse to visit them at their home until they no longer own any dogs.

I have a dog who is put into the utility room when we have nervous visitors as he’s a very big dog and I do t want my visitors to feel uncomfortable.

Yes, quite. That’s what I’m finding so unbelievable about this thread.

From a young age they have been around her unrestrained; pinning her to the wall and nosing her face at 18mo, barking at her til she leaves the couch and they take the spot

Yabu.

Yes, your PIL are ur too. But to be completely frank it sounds like you as parents have utterly failed your dd for years. Lucky you that there hasn't been an awful outcome.

This 'we can't visit you with the dogs there' conversation should have happened YEARS ago.

I wouldn't go near that house. Why put a child in that situation more than once?

My mums dog isn’t aggressive but it’s a Labrador “puppy” he’s 1 and he’s the size of a bloody pony, he’s humongous and as soon as you walk in he’s going ballistic, he’s jumping all over you, knocking drinks out your hand, nudging you under the chin, pretty much sitting on your head, and my mum just laughs and she’s like oh bless him, he likes you 😂 yeah well the feelings now mutual get your bloody elephant off my lap ffs, I do like dogs but come on, if someone’s kid was doing that you’d expect the parent to put a. Stop to it, but when it’s a dog it’s all fun and games 🙄

Do you really need to ask? Should your child be in a situation where they could get bitten by an aggressive dog? No. Of course they shouldn’t.

I wouldn’t take my child to stay in a house with an aggressive dog.

It’s not a discussion, it’s a no.

I’d insist they visit you if they want to see you, why should you out your child risk, a lot of dog owners think their dog is the cutest, funniest, loveliest dog in the world when in reality they’re a bloody pain in the arse.

I own 3 dogs and would not go there unless dogs were properly secured away!

I absolutely adore dogs. I wouldn't go anywhere where I thought a dangerous dog could hurt me or mine.

It's lovely that they love and care for their dogs

BUT why on earth are YOU visiting them !

no

they visit you without the dogs

or

you meet somewhere neutral without the dogs - and if it's for a weekend then the dogs go to kennels or a dog sitter.