Holiday home - what are your top 5 must haves - in order?

I know this isn't exactly what you mean, but I only want to go somewhere that is at least as nice as my own house and preferably nicer (not hard!). I don't want to go somewhere that is decorated, furnished and has kitchen/bathrooms from 30 odd years ago. For me holiday lets should be a bit luxurious.

Other than that, a room each for DC as they don't share well; more than one bathroom (even though I only have one at home); WiFi; if in the UK a wood burner/open fire; if abroad for summer hols a pool.

Double oven gloves🤣…

House keeping
Nanny
Chef
Driver
Pilot
In that order.

Bed size is number 1 for me - my husband and I can’t sleep together in a double and at home have a super king so as a minimum I would want a king!

number of bedrooms so everyone has their own space

washing machine cause toddlers

good wifi

basic amenities within about 10 mins

WiFi
Free parking
Decent heating system
Some sort of entrance/porch area or seating to deal with muddy boots
The more remote, the better

Dog friendly
parking space
washing machine
wifi

1. Parking on site
2. Decent sofa
3. wifi
4. Dishwasher
5. Washing machine

Beds in the right configuration (not on different levels etc)

Dishwasher

King sized bed in master bedroom

Washing Machine

Off road parking

Washing machines are useful if kids clothes get wet (because on didn't listen when repeatedly told that something was slippery and they would fall into the water...) better than having salty muddy jeans sat around or being able to wash a chocolate ice cream stain out right away.

I wash all my clothes before I go home. It’s either that or doing it at home the day after I arrive.

I like coming home with the holiday clothes washed. It's no huge trouble to chuck a load or two of washing in on the penultimate day of the holiday and if you're in a hot country it will be dry in no time. I'd much rather do that than have a week or fortnight's worth of laundry to do when I get home

No mezzanine bedrooms.
Dishwasher
washing machine
In a town
Near a bus route

I'm well past that age now but don't remember washing stuff when I did. You wouldn't wash if you were abroad (or are people doing that too?) so still not sure what you're washing.

I love doing washing on holiday I😂 I home with a suitcase full of clean clothes.

assuming it’s DH me amd two teen boys in a two bed place

1. Twin beds in at least one of the rooms - they are not going to share a double
2. Basic supplies - dishwasher tabs, washing up liquid, kitchen towel, toilet paper, oil / salt / pepper etc. And decent cleaning supplies if you want me to leave it clean!
3. Enough comfortable living room seating for everyone: the number of time I’ve gone with a group of 5-6 and there’s only seating for 4 🙄.
4. Lamps - table / standing lamps in reception areas, bedside lamps in bedrooms. No one likes the Big Light to be on.
5. Clean, clean, clean - it had to be clean.

My number 1 is always a washing machine 😂 Means you can pack light and can properly wash& rinse swimwear/beach towels

Apart from that ideally:
Two bathrooms for 2 adults and 2 teenage DC
Dishwasher
Comfy sofas
Easy way to dispose of all rubbish.
Full clean - not paying £££ to strip beds thanks

Non negotiables for us are off road parking, bedroom arrangements that work for whoever is going- nobody sleeping in the living room - and a kitchen that is at least as well equipped as mine at home. I can't put those in any particular order as they are all essential. A reasonable degree of privacy is important but exactly how much depends to a degree on where we're going and for how long. For a mainstream holiday I would want to be very separate but I wouldn't mind some shared facilities or being attached to the owner's property for the weekend. If we are going somewhere hot I probably wouldn't book anywhere without a private pool unless there was absolutely no choice.

No kids?

Mine are all focused around my child

Profiling bed

Overhead tracking

Parking big enough for our WAV

Hot tub with a hoist

Garden area that is wheelchair accessible

Bed that's actual normal sized humans can fit on
A bath
A cooker that cooks in normal time
Comfortable sofa
Things to do within walking distance (even if it's a nice walk)

What are you all washing on your holidays? I spend 8-10 weeks every year in holiday cottages and I've never used a washing machine, it wouldn't cross my mind.

I never worry about the bed size until we are on holiday then remember that with dh being 6'4" we have a king for a reason (and a EU size one which is slightly longer as well, gutted ikea have stopped selling the mattresses for those!)

Usefully equipped kitchen

Washing machine

WiFi

Towels

Laid out well. Once had the loo off dcs bedroom. It wasn't awful but annoying at night to creep through with them sleeping.

My Cat is welcome (so irritating when "Pets Welcome" really only means "dogs welcome")
Large safe garden for cat
Not more than two hours drive (don;t like cat being in the car too long)
Good WiFi
Easy to park close by

Last place I booked, I was was driving down, Tesco delivery sorted - & it struck me that I hadn't checked there was a freezer. (it did have one, I didn't have to eat 6 soleros at once).

I always read reviews carefully - I couldn't care less that someone arrived and there was only one dishwasher tablet, but it's useful to know in advance,

Clean cutlery tray/drawer - I have been to spotless holidays homes before but always, always the cutlery tray has crumbs etc in 🤢

Blackout curtains - especially in the kids’ rooms

Not having to strip beds when leaving - I think this is so cheeky especially given check out times are so early/check in times are so late generally nowadays

Decent mattresses - again, especially for the kids’ and these often get overlooked and they get cheap ones

Dishwasher - essential 😁

Pool
Aesthetics
Bedrooms
A/C
Closeness to restaurants

I want to make it law for AirBnB owners to specify the coffee machine in its listing so you don't have to make a guess what kind of pods when you're picking up food on the way. And to provide enough basic cleaning and food stuffs so you don't have start every holiday buying a box of 32 finish capsules and 500ml of olive oil. Don't care about welcome baskets or all that nonsense.

Enough toilets for everyone - they must have locks and a window.

Easy parking.

Green area for dogs.

Good laundry facilities.

Seaside 15 minute drive away max.