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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Going to a playground without children?

138 replies

CantWaitForOctober · 19/08/2025 16:36

Just watched a video on Facebook of a woman confronting another woman who entered a playground and sat down without having a child with her. The woman was shouting at her asking her why she was in the playground if she doesn't have any children with her. This happens a lot where I am adults will come and sit down in the playground on the benches. (To be clear I am referring to a children's playground gated with swings and slides etc not a park with loads of grass and benches) although this isn't something I would do personally AIBU to think this is ok and she shouldn't be confronting her and recording her? Lots of people in the comments agreeing with the woman and saying she was right to confront her.

OP posts:
CantWaitForOctober · 20/08/2025 22:13

Definitely didn’t look staged, the woman was a Muslim woman and the other person shouting seemed to have an agenda to me as she mentioned the fact the woman couldn’t speak much English saying “you can’t even understand me can you”, I don’t think it was staged.

OP posts:
JillMW · 20/08/2025 20:24

I have seen a video like that, it seemed like a staged one. Often if there is shouting it is not real just for likes

MumOf4totstoteens · 20/08/2025 16:59

I think it’s odd but could be a valid reason. Saying that I also thing a mums gut instinct is mostly correct! Yesterday I was at a park and there were a few random men just loitering about the kids play area (not inside) they had no dogs or kids or anything and I didn’t like it.

Summeriscumin · 20/08/2025 15:32

Our local play park is halfway up a hill that separates the local newsagents/post office/minimart from the houses at the edge of the village. Lots of people of both sexes sit and watch the children play while they rest before the rest of the their walk.

it would be considered odd here to be suspicious of anyone sitting there.

Eagle2025 · 20/08/2025 15:25

CantWaitForOctober · 20/08/2025 15:23

Never seen one either

The thought of it actually makes me smile as it's funny to read 'adults' at the end of 'no unaccompanied'. Of course if they do have that sign it's not for happy reasons but it still makes me chuckle.

CantWaitForOctober · 20/08/2025 15:23

Eagle2025 · 20/08/2025 15:21

Not where I live. I've never seen a sign saying no unaccompanied adults.

Never seen one either

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Eagle2025 · 20/08/2025 15:21

Longingdreamer · 20/08/2025 15:14

Playgrounds always have a sign saying 'no unaccompanied adults' in my experience. If the adult is there is a child, or meeting a family with a child, then fine, otherwise they should find a bench outside of the playground. I have never known a park without them.

Not where I live. I've never seen a sign saying no unaccompanied adults.

Longingdreamer · 20/08/2025 15:14

Playgrounds always have a sign saying 'no unaccompanied adults' in my experience. If the adult is there is a child, or meeting a family with a child, then fine, otherwise they should find a bench outside of the playground. I have never known a park without them.

MidwinterSpring · 20/08/2025 15:10

It's not ok to harass someone just for sitting on a bench, that's hardly a crime. Obviously if they were filming kids or acting inappropriately that would be different.

user1492757084 · 20/08/2025 15:08

Nothing weird, especially if benches are there and the adult was eating lunch, reading a book; they could be waiting for a friend or not..
I would call Police if photos were being taken or if it were a man who was staring at the children inappropriately.

springtimemagic · 20/08/2025 15:05

CantWaitForOctober · 19/08/2025 16:36

Just watched a video on Facebook of a woman confronting another woman who entered a playground and sat down without having a child with her. The woman was shouting at her asking her why she was in the playground if she doesn't have any children with her. This happens a lot where I am adults will come and sit down in the playground on the benches. (To be clear I am referring to a children's playground gated with swings and slides etc not a park with loads of grass and benches) although this isn't something I would do personally AIBU to think this is ok and she shouldn't be confronting her and recording her? Lots of people in the comments agreeing with the woman and saying she was right to confront her.

We can all sit wherever we want - surely?!

I can’t believe this post.. insane

IsSheOkayOrWhat · 20/08/2025 14:59

Leave the woman alone she can sit wherever she wants! Jesus. What’s the world coming too. Unless the woman is harming you or your child then leave her be. Clearly got to much going on upstairs to confront and record a random woman!

TunnocksOrDeath · 20/08/2025 14:23

There’s a bench at the edge of the playing field in the village where I grew up. A few years ago the council put some playground equipment in (yay!) next to the bench and erected a fence round the both. Are people seriously suggesting that adults shouldn’t be allowed to sit on the bench anymore to watch the cricket/football because there’s a climbing frame next to it?

GleisZwei · 20/08/2025 12:54

If I am honest, I do find it a bit odd.
The only time I'd ever consider doing that is if I felt so unwell/tired that I had to sit, and there was nowhere else suitable.

catin8oot5 · 20/08/2025 12:51

Are you not going to be watching your children in this fictional playground?

catin8oot5 · 20/08/2025 12:50

Fucks sake. The old nonce on every corner narrative. Grow up and stop reading the daily mail.

CantWaitForOctober · 20/08/2025 12:48

delightfulmusic · 20/08/2025 12:39

Most people would probably believe I sit in play parks on my own but actually I let my daughters walk on ahead and I just sit quietly so I’m there if they need me while giving them a bit of independence so it’s not always what it seems

Depends on the playground I think, the times it’s happened near me my kids have been the only ones in the playground so it was obvious the adult was alone

OP posts:
Gwenhwyfar · 20/08/2025 12:45

Ddakji · 19/08/2025 17:32

I wouldn’t like it and I think people are being really naive about this.

The more I live in the world, the more I read and see and hear, the more I just know how many pedophiles walk among us. And far too often they are, purposefully or by accident, protected.

In this instance, if these are the only benches in the park I would be on to the council to provide other benches outside the playground.

There are playgrounds near me that specifically say “no adults who aren’t accompanied by a child”.

Who cares if you like it or not though? It's up to you not to go there if you don't like it, not somebody else to be moved on.

Sage71 · 20/08/2025 12:41

As a mum to two moody teenage boys I do sometimes sit in the park and watch the little ones play. They are so delightful, the excitement and the reactions everything is fun and I remember when mine were little and reacted in the same way. I miss those days but I certainly don’t have any bad intentions it is just a reminder of days gone by.

delightfulmusic · 20/08/2025 12:39

Most people would probably believe I sit in play parks on my own but actually I let my daughters walk on ahead and I just sit quietly so I’m there if they need me while giving them a bit of independence so it’s not always what it seems

LostFuse · 20/08/2025 12:36

Darragon · 19/08/2025 17:11

The song Aqualung is specifically about a paedo that used to do this in Cambridge. I don't think it's ok. I'd be more tolerant of a woman than a man but I wouldn't completely let her off the hook because some paedos are women too. There are also organised child snatching gangs that eye up kids and could be picking one whose parent was less attentive to snatch at a later date. People just aren't streetwise enough if they think this is always safe and fine. There's also the adult baby/adult child fetishists to watch out for who can be male or female. There are so many reasons why everyone should have their spidey senses tingling if anyone without kids is at an enclosed play park while kids are on it, but I don't think aggressive confrontation is necessarily the right answer. Just an awareness that it's not perfectly safe just because the person in question has a pair of tits and maybe a word asking them to leave or a phone call to the police if it became obvious they were actually causing issues. I'd much rather people saved the confrontations for the arseholes who take their dogs inside the park enclosure (whose feeble defence is always "he's friendly").

Edited

The song is not about a pedophile - it's a story of homelessness and how society deals with it and about how people see him.
Inspired by a photograph Ian Anderson's wife took of a homeless man.

dogcatkitten · 20/08/2025 12:21

The world has gone mad when a woman can't sit and watch children play. I used to walk past a school playground going to get lunch some working days, the sheer energy (and noise) was amazing and I would dawdle and maybe pause for a second or two just to watch. Probably a hanging offence by now.

If there were limited sitting places and mum's wanted them fair enough to give the seat up to them, or if it was crowded and you were going to be in the way find a seat or watch from outside. Adults using the equipment, even if it was quiet no way. But if the rules say only adults with children are allowed in then that's the rules and people should obey them.

Eagle2025 · 20/08/2025 12:17

noidea69 · 20/08/2025 12:14

I think this comes under the category of "its fine if a woman does it, but weird if a man does it".

Although not according to the creator of the video and all the comments from people agreeing she was right to confront the woman.

noidea69 · 20/08/2025 12:14

I think this comes under the category of "its fine if a woman does it, but weird if a man does it".

SecretNameAsImShy · 20/08/2025 12:12

My town has a very large park which has a playground at each end. The park itself doesn't have very many benches so I have in the past used the benches in the playgrounds.

I wonder if the woman felt safer in the playground than in the open park or maybe she loves kids and likes to watch them play or maybe, she is lonely. Any number of reasons she could be there.

I would be much more worried about a man sat in the playground, however, which could be completely irrational of me!