Mothers chihuahua ate half of my babies grape

Unfortunately not very sensible to take grapes to that household if you knew grapes are toxic to dogs - so you might consider making a small contribution to the bill if you can afford it. But definitely not worth going there again.

You are getting a lot of rude replies from posters on here. If people have nothing nice to type they shouldn't bother typing. Your Mum and sister don't sound so nice. Lots of photos of the new dog and none of the GC's. I would put the dog in the crate as soon as I arrived. It hasn't been trained properly so it is dangerous. I'm sure one grape would have been fine. Back in the 80s dogs used to eat grapes and chocolate and nothing ever happened. To rush to the vets over one grape is bonkers. Sounds like they wanted to guilt trip you. I wouldn't pay the fee as they should chill out. If it was going to cause a big family row I might pay half. Show them this thread.

The dog bites your child's face, yet you continue to take them there? Because your adult sister chooses not to visit you... So you'd rather put your baby in danger.

Send a Get Well card... and a bunch of grapes.

I've always had dogs - all cocker spaniels who are very docile & family-friendly dogs, but tend to be rather greedy (which helps when training them LOL!) but they will steal food if left where they can reach it & if no-one is there to tell them 'no'.

I have never left a dog unsupervised with a child - even for a couple of seconds while I pop into the kitchen to turn something on the cooker down. I have always taken the dog/s with me.

My youngest GC is now 8, even now I wouldn't leave her alone with a dog as, despite my current pair of elderly cocker's who she's known all her life are very reliable & wouldn't hurt her, they are animals & you never know how they may react to a situation (such as a sudden loud noise waking them from sleeping) - I wouldn't take the risk.

Having said that, my dogs have been taught to leave people alone when they're eating at the table, they go to their baskets & don't beg. However, I wouldn't trust them if I had a small child eating a biscuit sitting in the living room if they weren't being watched. I am certain that one in particular could beg & may possibly decide to help herself if someone (eg: an adult) wasn't there to tell her to go to her bed & leave it alone. She's a very good dog especially with small children, she sits & bows her head, avoiding eye contact to let them pet her - but that's when in the company of a Responsible Adult (RA). But if there was a toddler eating a biscuit & no RA around.....I wouldn't trust her. The other one is so laid back he doesn't know what's going on until the other one tells him that the postie is at the door & he has a duty to bark & protect the house. 🙃

I would never, ever allow the kind of behaviour that you're describing. My dogs would be put into another room, crated or whatever.

Personally I wouldn't take the child there again. It's never acceptable for a dog to 'nip' (in other words bite) a child & if it was my child I'd be incandescent with anger. If I was the Granny I wouldn't be sorry enough - I'd be devastated & blaming myself for being so neglectful of my GC.

edited for grammar

Well as lovely as it is to have personal
aspirations in life. I would suggest prioritising your sense of humour first.

I'm not sure I agree with your comment that your mum is a 'proper mum' to your older sister - it sounds as though she is trapped if they do everything together and your sister is still living at home at that age. Is your sister happy with her life do you think? I'd say you were the lucky one to get away and to have your own life.

I really feel for you being in this situation - it sounds as though you put in all the effort, despite having two young kids to care for, and your mum gives you nothing in terms of physical or emotional support. You don't deserve to pay any of that vet's bill - it's 100% on your mum. I have no practical advice, but I do think YANBU and I hope you are able to get to a position where you can see your sister without having to tolerate your toxic mother.

I wish I was as edgy and dark as you.

Umm I'd be saying no take it as the price for your dog biting my baby in the face.
Wtaf op.. How are you still going there when their pet is literally biting your kids and they are putting their dog above your kids??
You need to put your kids first and stop going there.

Yes I wonder who could have got the wrong end of the stick and reported it………Many apologies if it offended you- I’d happily send over an apology fruit basket. Light on the grapes of course.

This!!

Frankly you should not be visiting them at all after the dog bit your child. And to do so is irresponsible. Your child will find other people to 'adore'. I would not go back.

Exactly. As I’d put in my post, the OP’s mother not training the dog or taking it out for walks is where a lot of these problems begin and end. The OP mentioned the dog being reactive when she tried to take something away from it in the past. Probably another example in a list that the OP’s mother has chosen to do sweet FA about. It’s reasonable to conclude the OP’s mother did naff all in response to her dog biting the grandchildren.

Who let the dog go downstairs is a very valid question. It sounds like nobody was supervising the dog or keeping it under control. It certainly wasn’t the OP’s job.

As far as I’m concerned the OP’s mother (the dog’s owner) is to blame. Clearly didn’t ensure the dog was being kept under control/properly supervised. If she had been training the dog, they might have trained it to not eat random stuff on the floor by this point. They could have at least been working on the resource guarding issues i.e. stopping the dog from being reactive when somebody tries to take something from it. It should be pretty bloody obvious to the OP’s mother by now why this does need to be addressed: might be handy if anyone can take something from this dog in future without the worry of the dog attacking.

Well your post was deleted….

Half the post is irrelevant in the incident you are asking advise on. It doesn't matter whether the dog is a pain or not, you chose to go there knowing what he is like. Would you be offering to pay if the dog was well behaved?

Knowing he has free roam of the house, you should not have got the grapes out and give to a toddler who can't be trusted to be careful.
My dog would never harm a child and is perfectly loving, but I would not allow a toddler to sit there and eat food toxic to my dog in his home, as there is of them being dropped

You are being unreasonable as your child did not need to eat grapes during the visit, you put the dog at risk, so you should pay. Doesn't matter the temperament of the dog. It is the dogs home and he should not be put at risk.

On a separate note, if you know what the dog is like then you should not put your child at risk going there either

Well that was the intention- but it is mumsnet so I am largely unsurprised they went straight to intentional dog murder.

Suggesting that they put grapes through the front door, where a dog can access them, eat them and die is such hilarity? Almost as funny as a baby having their face bitten 🙄.

There is no way I’d be taking my kids to that house with those untrained animals. What are you thinking OP? Seriously??
if your eldest wants to see your sister tell her to go to your house.
it’s not safe there for them. I wouldn’t be putting my kids in danger like that. Sorry but your mum doesn’t sound interested in your babies, so you need to keep them safe

You shouldn’t have to pay the bill, but you are unreasonable to take your children to a house where the dogs aren’t kept separate and that you know bite your children. Your mums is unreasonable also for not keeping her dogs separate. You all sound irresponsible, but you’re the parent so ultimately it’s for you to protect your children.

Quite.

If they got the dog last year it's just a puppy and I doubt bit viciously however no way id have amy baby around a nippy puppy! Tell them to crate the dog as soon as you go in or you do it.

That said, you shouldn't have been feeding your baby grapes around a dog. They're dangerous. I think you should pay the bet bill or at least offer to go halves.

I saw your since deleted post. It was an attempt to bring a bit of levity to the thread. I think it’s a stretch to say you had proposed killing the dog.

Why on earth do you keep going there?
It's not safe for your baby. The dogs are poorly trained and dangerous.
The grape thing is ridiculous.
Do not pay the vet bill.
Do not go there again.
Your sister and your mother can visit you at your home where there are no dogs and it's safe for a baby.
If they don't come and visit you it shows you how much they care.

YABVU...to take your children to a house with a dog who bites them.

No don’t pay the vet bill. If her dog was correctly trained or being supervised it wouldn’t have happened. Your baby could drop a million grapes around my dog and she wouldn’t touch them unless I told her she could (which obviously I wouldn’t). If she hadn’t reached that rate of training then she would be very closely supervised.

Babies drop food - we all know that. The dog was upstairs to the best of your knowledge. Who let her downstairs? Surely they are just as much to blame.

As for not letting the poor thing out of the house - that is just cruel. A young healthy dog has no need to be restricted to a house. Especially if she isn’t trained and therefore isn’t even being mentally stimulated with any training.

An untrained dog is an unhappy dog. Her behaviours will only get worse and worse as she gets older, more unruly and ultimately bored out of her brain. She will find things to occupy her time - likely to be destructive, and is much more likely to end up as a reactive time bomb.

Do not take your children back there. Don’t pander to your older sister who can’t cut the apron strings and is happy to risk the safety of your child rather than make the effort to visit you on her own.