Am I just going to look like shit forever now?

When you say bloods done - was this through the NHS or private? What did you ask for?

‘A sticking-plaster for a system wide problem’

😂😂 sorry it’s serious but you made me laugh ❤️

Try tretinoin for your skin, works wonders. Drink loads of water. x

Just solidarity from me, and if it helps, I can guarantee you look better than I do! My eldest is about to turn 10, and I still haven't really lost that baby weight, let alone the others. My teeth also shifted during pregnancy, and look worse than before I had braces as a teenager. I'm really interested in the advice about nutrient deficiencies on this thread, I do take a multivitamin on and off but maybe I should do so more, as my hair is falling out really badly, I had assumed it was a perimenopause thing.

Best of luck OP, if anything works well let us know.

Uk lash eyebrow & lash serum, tinted spf daily, vitamins and take 1 spatone a day!

Outside and inside work needed to get your pink back. Go on TikTok and follow the Shelbyann viral drugstore makeup routine the main thing to take from it is lots of skin prep before makeup. Start exercising as this will give you a boost mentally and physically and start doing things that give you joy. Get a face tan mist (in a spray tin) garnier do a good one. Go out once a week to meet some girls to laugh without the kids with or without wine up to you, but just meeting them will boost you up.
Consider hair extensions or get a casting crème gloss (L’Oréal) in a colour a bit lighter than yours so your hair doesn’t go to dark to give it some texture
buy a home kit to diy dye your eyebrows (eyelure dye brow is good)
go get nails done (French manicure gels) and an Elemis facial (budget permitting)
use a body lotion everyday and use your perfume

head to a store and try on some clothes so you end up with some you really like

good luck xxxx

Sounds like issues to fix from the inside out to me, as all of those things are signs of less than optimum health, not some mystical decent into hideousness in the space of two years. I know it's hard with a toddler, but it's the holy trinity you need. Excellent nutrition, lots of outdoor excercise and plenty of sleep. If you can't manage the last one, then two out of three ain't bad as they say. Vit B and D supplements help too.

The things that helped me - apart from sleep was
I always wore lipstick
bright hair
nice coloured tops
seeing friends
Good skin care.

also the phrase- this too shall pass!

My skin looks grey, greasy, dry and dull, my hair feels so thin and breaks so easily

Could you be low in iron or have thyroid issues, these could be symptoms, I would go and get your bloods checked

I was low in Iron and vit D a few years ago ( discovered during a blood test) and I also had some of your symptoms, I took Iron for six months continuously ( still take it a couple of times a week) and the colour came back to my face and I was less tired looking

letstalkaboutjam
what vitamins do you take please.

I look back at photos when my kids were little and am always struck with how tired I look and how frumpy my clothes were. I think I went big on practicality and ease and also had limited time and places to shop. I also seemed to wear a lot of dull colours (maybe they hid stains better?) It’s only the last couple of years when I’ve started to wear nicer, brighter things. Dopamine dressing.

I definitely looked shit for a few years after giving birth on both of my children.
It takes 3 years, IME to bounce back fully, my hair and skin was shit.
Try a pro biotic vitamin it'll help boost your skin and mood.
Don't worry so much. 🥰

Well done on that weight loss that's brilliant 👏🏻 You're doing amazingly and you should feel proud of yourself and your health is obviously more fragile after children, so you have done really well to get the weight off in spite of this.

I agree with others about the early years with young children. I had my eldest DD at 29, then my youngest aged 39... I think I've never really recovered lol 😆 😂

Seriously though, I lost the weight through a low carb diet with my son during my second pregnancy, but since perimenopause, I am really struggling. It is hard, and others are right, being a mum to young kids can make you look washed out etc but it does get better with a good diet and more sleep etc. Just make sure you prioritise yourself occasionally more (I know, easier said than done!) These things will pass, and you will be ok.

I wouldn't do fasting on top of sleep deprivation! Be kind to yourself.

What did you actually get tested for? NHS test for very few things so you may still have deficiencies, as PP said the ridged nails are a big sign.

Don't be so hard on yourself! 'Absolutely horrific' can be a look of sorts.

It’s so difficult when you are so tired! And you are working FT!

It is very difficult to focus on you until DC starts school at least. You’ll get some bits in but it will wear off too quickly!

Echoing other posters, supplements - Vitamin D in winter especially and also some weekends away from DC. Either with some girl friends or with your partner if you can access the childcare.

Raising a child is relentless, you need a break.

Damn, love the thought of a bit of bin juice 😂

You are doing so much better than you think you are. Took me a decade to get back in the gym.

Go to John Lewis for a personal shop. It’s free, you don’t have to buy anything and it’s just a nice way to spend an hour or two.

Oh and shopping = steps!

Treat yourself to a spray tan and get your hair and nails done! Time for a glow up!!!

I'd strongly encourage you to get blood tests for vitamin and thyroid deficiencies because that doesn't sound normal to me and deficiencies could account for all of that.

We have a tendency to treat these issues as beauty or vanity issues but they can be symptoms of actual health issues.

Get a protein shake product. I have one every morning. They make vegan ones if you're not a meat eater.
The shakes are expensive and almost all of them have sugar in them, so I mix an affordable pumpkin seed protein with a high protein milk substitute made from chickpeas. It gives me close to 30 grams.
However, 120 grams could be way too much for your body weight and too much protein can actually cause health problems. To build muscle you shouldn't need more than a gram per kg of body weight a day. Only athletes need more than that.

I feel you.

It’s a very long process. I looked like utter shit for about 8 years when the kids were little and I was feeding them. I didn’t get a lot of sleep either. The photos from this era I can’t even look at.

I promise it gets better, I promise. Just keep doing what you are. You are doing an amazing job.

Fake tan helps a lot!!