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Marks & Spencers bra fittings and trans women - they've missed the point

286 replies

IdaGlossop · 18/08/2025 18:36

A mother complained to M&S when her daughter was approached in-store by a trans woman asking if she could be of assistance. The daughter needed a bra fitting and was upset as she could see that the member of staff was male. M&S apologised.

Today, in response to the incident, M&S have announced that bra fittings are for biological women only. The solution to the mother's complaint is to not deploy trans women staff in the lingerie department! Banning trans women from having bra fittings discriminates against trans women and doesn't solve the original problem.

YANBU = M&S have messed up with this decision
YABU = Banning trans women from bra fittings protects biological women from being offered bra fittings by trans women staff

www.thepinknews.com/2025/08/18/ms-bra-fitting-trans/

OP posts:
Thread gallery
9
SqueakyDoor · 18/08/2025 21:41

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 18/08/2025 21:08

Why would a man need a bra if his back size changed?

Bras are required to accommodate the female breasts, which are on the front of a woman's body.

Not their backs.

HTH

What do you think the 32, 34, 36, 38, 40 and so on refers to?

IdaGlossop · 18/08/2025 21:38

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 18/08/2025 21:08

Why would a man need a bra if his back size changed?

Bras are required to accommodate the female breasts, which are on the front of a woman's body.

Not their backs.

HTH

A bra is fitted based on boob size and back size. So if a man has surgically created boobs and gains weight, the boobs will stay the same size and the back will increase in size. If he wears a bra, he'll need one with a bigger back size but with cups the same size as the previous bra, hence a bra fitting.

For typo

OP posts:
TurkeyTwizlers · 18/08/2025 21:11

Some want them though.

Im sure a lot of men want women to do things because they like it, doesn’t mean it should happen though.
clearly there can be a specialised service for transwomen and they will want to go into the women’s.

BundleBoogie · 18/08/2025 21:10

hiintrepidheroes · 18/08/2025 18:49

I have spoken and interacted with several trans women, they are living their life and it’s nothing to do with fetish.

There might be some, but most are doing nothing to hurt women. It is insulting to say it’s a fetish and incorrect.

For quite a few men it is absolutely a fetish. They are quite keen to tell us all about it.

Maybe the ones you know are not, or maybe they just don’t tell you?

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 18/08/2025 21:09

IdaGlossop · 18/08/2025 21:06

That leaves online bra fittings.

Well, that's fine then.

They can get bras online, like the vast majority of women.

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 18/08/2025 21:08

IdaGlossop · 18/08/2025 21:03

Light bulb moment: they probably don't need bra fittings. Some want them though. Their back size could change if they lose or gain weight. Then they would need them.

Why would a man need a bra if his back size changed?

Bras are required to accommodate the female breasts, which are on the front of a woman's body.

Not their backs.

HTH

IdaGlossop · 18/08/2025 21:06

SingingintheRadiator · 18/08/2025 19:43

Wouldn't be profitable because there aren't enough of them.

That leaves online bra fittings.

OP posts:
IdaGlossop · 18/08/2025 21:03

KilkennyCats · 18/08/2025 19:41

Why do you think transwomen (who are biologically male) need bra fittings, op?
They either have no boobs, or surgically constructed boobs in which case they’ll know their dimensions perfectly well.

Light bulb moment: they probably don't need bra fittings. Some want them though. Their back size could change if they lose or gain weight. Then they would need them.

OP posts:
beachwalkx · 18/08/2025 20:35

I don’t even know why they still offer bra fittings as they’re shockingly bad at it

AnSolas · 18/08/2025 20:30

KilkennyCats · 18/08/2025 20:17

I’d love to see any man exert his legal right to wear a bra.

The funny bit would be if M&S mounted a defense Canadian ball waxing style??

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 18/08/2025 20:27

gmgnts · 18/08/2025 20:13

I've managed to get by for the whole of my adult life without a bra fitting, and I suspect most women are the same, so I don't see why transwomen need to fuss about having bras fitted. Unless, of course, they have some kind of fetish about the business of wearing bras.

Wash your mouth out with soap!
Men would never have such a fetish!

bunsnroses1 · 18/08/2025 20:18

mamagogo1 · 18/08/2025 19:36

@TurkeyTwizlers

sone men may have a fetish for dressing in women’s clothing but there are others who are trans for other reasons. Some provision is needed

And how do you propose we tell the difference?

KilkennyCats · 18/08/2025 20:17

AnSolas · 18/08/2025 20:14

Legally M&S is selling a product which can be used by both women and men.
So unless M&S have gotten great legal advice from the outside looking in they are refusing to fit men because they are men.

So as a cover their ass they could train male staff to provide male fittings in the mens changing rooms.

I’d love to see any man exert his legal right to wear a bra.

JSMill · 18/08/2025 20:17

Profhilodisaster · 18/08/2025 18:49

Bra fitting should be carried out by a person who is the same biological sex as the customer in a changing room designated for that sex .

Absolutely perfect solution.

Charabanc · 18/08/2025 20:15

AnSolas · 18/08/2025 20:14

Legally M&S is selling a product which can be used by both women and men.
So unless M&S have gotten great legal advice from the outside looking in they are refusing to fit men because they are men.

So as a cover their ass they could train male staff to provide male fittings in the mens changing rooms.

Ha ha. That would be hilarious! Imagine the deep-voiced hissy fits!! 😆

AnSolas · 18/08/2025 20:14

Charabanc · 18/08/2025 19:54

Why. Why is "some provision needed"?

Legally M&S is selling a product which can be used by both women and men.
So unless M&S have gotten great legal advice from the outside looking in they are refusing to fit men because they are men.

So as a cover their ass they could train male staff to provide male fittings in the mens changing rooms.

gmgnts · 18/08/2025 20:13

I've managed to get by for the whole of my adult life without a bra fitting, and I suspect most women are the same, so I don't see why transwomen need to fuss about having bras fitted. Unless, of course, they have some kind of fetish about the business of wearing bras.

usedtobeaylis · 18/08/2025 20:02

A woman shouldn't have to fit a bra for a male and a woman shouldn't have to have one fitted by a male. Other than that, no issue with trans identified males being fitted for bras in an appropriate way.

It is interesting how cross dressing fetishes have vanished in an otherwise pornified world isn't it 🙃

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 18/08/2025 19:59

Some provision is needed

No it isn't.

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 18/08/2025 19:57

IdaGlossop · 18/08/2025 18:48

Point taken about the wrong question. I think trans women should have a specialist bra fitting service, carried out by other trans women in a dedicated store or at home.

And I think that if men want to buy bras, there are hundreds of outlets online where they can do so.

Oh but then they wouldn't be able to ride roughshod over the privacy and dignity of real women.

FKAT · 18/08/2025 19:57

For the whole of the 20th Century it was widely understood that cross-dressing was a paraphilia strongly correlated with sexual fetish, sexual domination, misogyny and harassment. This was not an obscure piece of information only known to therapists and psycho sexual researchers. Alfred Hitchcock made Oscar nominated films about it. Thomas Harris wrote bestselling thrillers about it. Entire genres of US and UK comedy made jokes about it.

In the 21st century, the cross-dressers and their supporting industries (media, pharma, health) did a massive PR push to make them, not only accepted, but the Most Vulnerable and Marginalised and credulous fools in government, charities and business fell for it.

You now have GROWN WOMEN on here arguing that a cross-dressing male who wants to speak to teens about their tits is not a sexual threat, it's not sexual and if anything, HE'S the victim.

Charabanc · 18/08/2025 19:54

mamagogo1 · 18/08/2025 19:36

@TurkeyTwizlers

sone men may have a fetish for dressing in women’s clothing but there are others who are trans for other reasons. Some provision is needed

Why. Why is "some provision needed"?

Namelessnelly · 18/08/2025 19:52

mamagogo1 · 18/08/2025 19:36

@TurkeyTwizlers

sone men may have a fetish for dressing in women’s clothing but there are others who are trans for other reasons. Some provision is needed

But why is it women’s place to provide that provision? Why should women care

AnSolas · 18/08/2025 19:49

Muffinmam · 18/08/2025 19:12

So he is a child predator and attempted to assault a child. Why isn’t he facing charges???

If you were on a jury what would you convict him of?

AnSolas · 18/08/2025 19:47

IdaGlossop · 18/08/2025 19:28

The news reports don't need to mention the mother, in that case. THIS making appointments as you describe is yet one more illustration that the trans issu is going to take up more public space than it merits.

Not really it clearly shows that some women who work in "underwear" face a higher level of sexual harrassment from men that women who work in other departments.

Plus that M&S had not carried out a proper review of their work proceedure to take account of the fact that some men wear bras.

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