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AIBU?

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Original poster

Poor mobility but not registered disabled

83 replies

BUMCHEESE · 18/08/2025 16:04

My DM is 82 and can only walk very limited distances due to an issue with her legs and feet - a few minutes max. She is able to do this unaided eg without zimmer frame.

But from what I've read she wouldn't be classified as disabled or get any special treatment e.g. special parking or access to a wheelchair etc.

It makes doing things with her very difficult as we try to meet half way between our houses - my DC can't sit still for long so while we can meet for a meal it's stressful, and we have to find somewhere with parking close by etc.

AIBU to struggle to think of things to do and places to meet and to think provision for people like this is poor?

(Half way is around Windsor area, in case anyone has any suggestions!)

OP posts:
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ohbee · 18/08/2025 17:36

BUMCHEESE · 18/08/2025 17:30

I live 5 hours away and often go to see her by public transport.

She doesn't want to use a wheelchair either, as far as I can ascertain, so wouldn't want her own.

Show quote history

Why did you mention wheelchairs then if they are not relevant?

just go on her local council website, look up the BB information and see what you have to do. You can usually apply for someone but equally you could do it with her whichever is easiest

PerfectlyPlotted · 18/08/2025 17:36

Apply for attendance allowance - she sounds like she has a few care needs

RejoiceandSing · 18/08/2025 17:32

Lots of wheelchair users buy their own wheelchair, because NHS wheelchair criteria is incredibly limited. Even if you meet the criteria, the provision is often so basic/ inadequate that people have to pay to improve it or just buy their own anyway. So she can do that if she likes. She can also borrow a tramper or similar on days out, you don't usually have to show anything.
Slow and in pain might count for the blue badge, it's not just about how far you can physically force yourself to walk before you collapse, it's about how far you can walk before you're in too much pain or have to rest.

Rocknrollstar · 18/08/2025 17:32

When we needed a wheelchair for my DM I advertised on our local FB group and Freecycle and a very nice person gave me one. Similarly a Zimmer frame.

Original poster
BUMCHEESE · 18/08/2025 17:32

Barney16 · 18/08/2025 16:12

I agree, if someone can't walk far options for days out or activities are very limited. Both my parents have extremely limited mobility ( neither will entertain a wheelchair) and it's virtually impossible to take them anywhere. I tend to drive them to where we are going, get them out of the car and then drive off to park. I find it really stressful, they move slowly and basically I'm illegally parked.

Thanks. Yes this is exactly it. Struggling to find suitable places to meet and things to do that work for us all.

OP posts:
Original poster
BUMCHEESE · 18/08/2025 17:30

Mumof1andacat · 18/08/2025 16:46

No such thing as being registered disabled. My dm has a blue badge following a knee replacement. Dm struggles to walk a long distance with out a break. You apply and provide evidence which might be clinic letters or a letter from the gp with a statement in support of the badge.

Thanks , can I apply on her behalf? Do I need her permission?

OP posts:
Original poster
BUMCHEESE · 18/08/2025 17:30

Sunseed · 18/08/2025 16:09

What is stopping you from buying a wheelchair?

I live 5 hours away and often go to see her by public transport.

She doesn't want to use a wheelchair either, as far as I can ascertain, so wouldn't want her own.

OP posts:
Original poster
BUMCHEESE · 18/08/2025 17:28

She can walk more than 50m. She will be slow and in pain but she can probably walk 4 times that.

OP posts:
Original poster
BUMCHEESE · 18/08/2025 17:27

SylvanianFamiliesBalcony · 18/08/2025 16:13

What do you mean by 'registered disabled'? There is no 'register' of people with disabilities. Not sure where this has come from?

Sorry poorly worded - I mean have PIP / blue badge

OP posts:
Mumof1andacat · 18/08/2025 16:46

No such thing as being registered disabled. My dm has a blue badge following a knee replacement. Dm struggles to walk a long distance with out a break. You apply and provide evidence which might be clinic letters or a letter from the gp with a statement in support of the badge.

Boomer55 · 18/08/2025 16:40

BUMCHEESE · 18/08/2025 16:04

My DM is 82 and can only walk very limited distances due to an issue with her legs and feet - a few minutes max. She is able to do this unaided eg without zimmer frame.

But from what I've read she wouldn't be classified as disabled or get any special treatment e.g. special parking or access to a wheelchair etc.

It makes doing things with her very difficult as we try to meet half way between our houses - my DC can't sit still for long so while we can meet for a meal it's stressful, and we have to find somewhere with parking close by etc.

AIBU to struggle to think of things to do and places to meet and to think provision for people like this is poor?

(Half way is around Windsor area, in case anyone has any suggestions!)

There’s no such thing as registered disabled. She can apply for a blue badge and she will be assessed.

The Red Cross do wheelchair hire.

FinallyHere · 18/08/2025 16:38

I can recommend the services provided by Windsor Shopmobility, mobility scooter hire for a very modest contribution. It’s right by Alexander Gardens which might work well for active DCs too. Might a mobility scooter work for outings?

https://www.people2places.org.uk/

people to places

People to Places | Dial-a-Ride and Shopmobility in RBWM

Accessible Dial-a-Ride, hospital transport, and Shopmobility services in Windsor and Maidenhead. Helping you stay mobile, independent and connected.

https://www.people2places.org.uk/

LadyKenya · 18/08/2025 16:38

I hired a wheelchair from the Red Cross. It was simple to do, and was clean, and comfortable.

MinnieCauldwell · 18/08/2025 16:32

I agree she needs BB but be warned some councils do not issue on old age and infirmity alone.

LadyKenya · 18/08/2025 16:31

Sunseed · 18/08/2025 16:09

What is stopping you from buying a wheelchair?

This. I have hired a wheelchair myself, when going for short breaks, at home, and abroad.

x2boys · 18/08/2025 16:24

BUMCHEESE · 18/08/2025 16:04

My DM is 82 and can only walk very limited distances due to an issue with her legs and feet - a few minutes max. She is able to do this unaided eg without zimmer frame.

But from what I've read she wouldn't be classified as disabled or get any special treatment e.g. special parking or access to a wheelchair etc.

It makes doing things with her very difficult as we try to meet half way between our houses - my DC can't sit still for long so while we can meet for a meal it's stressful, and we have to find somewhere with parking close by etc.

AIBU to struggle to think of things to do and places to meet and to think provision for people like this is poor?

(Half way is around Windsor area, in case anyone has any suggestions!)

Does she have a blue badge if not ,why not?

MickGeorge22 · 18/08/2025 16:22

She may qualify for a blue badge. the key to success is sending plenty of medical evidence to say why she can't mobilise far.

Kreepture · 18/08/2025 16:18

Apply for a BB via the council. Fill it in for her worst days, not the good ones.

As others have said, there is no disabled registry, you have to apply for the BB yourself. Mine is council issued, although i'm now also entitled to one via my PIP claim.

LIZS · 18/08/2025 16:17

Attendance Allowance would be the benefit but it is more relevant for those with additional care and support needs than mobility alone.

5128gap · 18/08/2025 16:16

Sounds to me like she'd be eligible for a blue badge for parking purposes. You don't need to be registered or on a passport benefit to apply under the discretionary rules. She'd just need support from her GP that she struggled to walk. If you think she'd benefit from a wheelchair, again, speak to her GP as they can signpost to access disability aids.

AudiobookListener · 18/08/2025 16:14

She's too old for PIP but might get a blue badge. Remember to mention pain, breathlessness and fatigue after walking as well as while walking. Folding wheelchair has already been suggested. One with small wheels is easier to get in a car and a small car with a high hatchback will make things much easier than a big car with a low back.

SylvanianFamiliesBalcony · 18/08/2025 16:13

What do you mean by 'registered disabled'? There is no 'register' of people with disabilities. Not sure where this has come from?

ohbee · 18/08/2025 16:12

Most disabled people using wheelchairs buy their wheelchairs. There is no ‘special treatment’ for being disabled. A BB application can be done via her local council website. Also worth looking into to attendance allowance.

Barney16 · 18/08/2025 16:12

I agree, if someone can't walk far options for days out or activities are very limited. Both my parents have extremely limited mobility ( neither will entertain a wheelchair) and it's virtually impossible to take them anywhere. I tend to drive them to where we are going, get them out of the car and then drive off to park. I find it really stressful, they move slowly and basically I'm illegally parked.

LIZS · 18/08/2025 16:12

She might qualify for a bb if she can walk less than 50m. Would she walk further with an aid like a rollator, can she use public transport? You could request an ot assessment for mobility and around the home, like grab rails. Are her mobility issues medically documented, if not arrange for her to see a physio to assess her.