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Original poster

So overwhelmed with newborn, handhold please

153 replies

zinrlow · 18/08/2025 03:13

Posting here as I didn’t know where to post.

I am so overwhelmed and can’t stop crying. My beautiful little boy was born on Friday and I am finding the adjustment so difficult.

I had a very traumatic birth experience which ended in an emergency C section, so I am healing from that and am in extreme pain all while trying to settle in to motherhood and looking after a newborn.

I’m 28 and have an amazingly supportive partner who I’m so grateful for right now, my family are amazing also and my mum has been over to help us today etc.

My baby is great throughout the day, he is so chilled and feeds well sleeps etc. However, the past 2 nights at home he just will not settle at all. No matter what I do, feed him, change him, burp him etc the second we put him down in his next to me crib / moses basket he just cries. He stops crying if you pick him up and cuddle him but that means absolutely no sleep for us.

My partner has just taken him downstairs to settle him and spend the night so that I can get some rest in bed but I feel awful. I am so overwhelmed and don’t know how I am going to cope with it all. I know it’s only been 2 nights but I am dreading the evenings as it is so difficult, the hot weather is not helping matters either.

I just don’t know what to do, I am crying so much thinking about life before and how it will never be normal again. I would love to hear others experiences and for someone to tell me that it gets better I

OP posts:
MavisandHetty · 18/08/2025 03:19

Aw bless you. Yes it will get better - promise! This week or two will be the worst for you: it’s a shock having a tiny human relying on you day and night! Plus your hormones, your milk, the exhaustion, the section… it really doesn’t get worse until they’re teens. Take each day as it comes. Plan ahead an hour and no longer. You’re doing well if you’re alive, vaguely fed, vaguely clean at this point. It’ll be about 6 weeks before you can hope for som sort of rhythm or predictability. Until then, go with it. Don’t pressure yourself. Seriously.

Congratulations on your new baby!

MyAcornWood · 18/08/2025 03:19

Oh my love, that is so completely normal, honestly! I have two children, a nearly four year old and a five month old and with both, DH and I did shifts for the first two, maybe three, weeks because we simply couldn’t put them down. It’s natural that they just want to be held close, all they’ve ever known is the comfort and safety of you, it’s a shock being born!
You’ve been through a lot yourself and you mustn’t feel guilty about you husband taking baby for a while. Make the most of the time to rest and heal and don’t expect too much of yourself.
We have all been there, that complete overwhelm, but it gets better, I promise you that.
Congratulations to you and your husband… it’s a hell of a ride, but truly the best job in the world 🥰

Ziga · 18/08/2025 03:16

Hi OP, I could have written your post 10 weeks ago. I want to say - take a breath, this is all so scary and new and you’re doing amazingly. The next thing is - I PROMISE you you will feel better soon. The baby wanting to be held is very very normal. It’ll be like that for a few weeks and then it’ll slowly get better. You and your partner could sleep in shifts if that’s the case, that’s what worked for us. Your world has been turned upside down and you’re healing emotionally and physically from a traumatic birth, so take things slow. Crying is absolutely normal and encouraged. You’ve got this - I PROMISE you things will settle soon. X

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