Hobby tainted

No it isn't similar football is seasonal. Presumably if there is a football tournament in the summer your DH will watch it. Fish keeping isn't seasonal They know the OP is going to get bored of it. Getting bored of something is different to the season ending and the hobby pausing.

It’s… normal. I mean my dh likes football. This time of year he talks about it non stop. This will happen next time of year, it’s repetitive (to me), wearing, and will drop right off at the end of the season and come back. It’s very normal.

ill go running more in summer, and try to make more time for exercise and talk about it more. I don’t do this in winter, that doesn’t make it repetitive and wearing for everyone else.

the key point here is she might talk too much about her hobby and bore their socks off. Op, stop doing that, enjoy your hobby, and find an online forum to go on about it on there.

@99bottlesofkombucha

They aren't supportive because as the OP says herself she gets carried away with it when she is doing it and talks enthusiastically about then gets bored of it. They know that the enthusiasm isn't going to last, they know she will give up, they know she will then start again with the enthusiasm. It's repetitive , draining and wearing.

And perhaps the OP needs reminding that fish are a living creature that also deserve respect and not just handed back when you are bored of the hobby

I think it being live fish though does change things - it isn’t a hobby you can dip in and out of it is a commitment and fish should be like any other pet a life commitment the fact she knows it isn’t going to stick.

mix that with the fact that teenagers are by their nature judgmental and passionate about things it isn’t a surprise

Your kids have no right to lay down the law about what you do in your house, especially when that really is a minimal impact on them. Ignore them.

These are living creatures not something to just get rid of when you get bored, Jesus

They are all being very immature and unkind. £4-8 a fish? I’d buy 6 and tell dh he had clearly forgotten our conversation so how would he know if he agreed 4 or 6? If he can’t remember it to support you, he isn’t allowed to remember it to have a go at you. Then tell your teens your mum is not fair game, and if anyone wants any support for any activities this week suggest you ask dad, as you are all old enough to understand after you’ve sat there being mean about my hobby I’m hardly going to drive you to yours. Hopefully it impacts dad’s work hours or going out as I would hold firm on that- minimum one week and he gets to support their activities 100%. You will also not do support like being the one to cook dinner or do needed things so he can go on a ride - gosh dh you can’t as I won’t be doing dinner to support you - support goes 2 ways in this marriage, or none.
sometimes kids need reminding that their mum is human not a punching bag, and sometimes partners need reminding that being an asshole has consequences

Totally agree with this. You can’t just pick up and drop living creatures when your “interest wanes”. Sorry, but that’s horrible.

If it was genuinely trains then fine, but actual creatures? No. Drop the hobby OP, if you can’t commit to caring for them for their whole lives.

I think your children showed blatant disrespect towards you. I’d be saying pipe down and take a back seat! What difference does it make to them if you have a hobby or not! They are not funding it, they should have been told to zip it, especially as you say it was said so unpleasantly. As for your H, he passively if not more encouraged them. Did it make him feel good, ganging up on Mum?

Please don’t let this subtract from your hobby, if it stops and starts so what??

So many hobbies on here that make me jealous as I don't have one 😂. I'm always desperate to know what they are for ideas!

Until I read that your hobby was fishkeeping, I was convinced that you were the poster who was obsessive about makeup in boots and loved touching it/buying it but kept getting stopped/followed by security guards - I thought the writing style was similar. But I must be misremembering and wayyyy off the mark.

I think losing interest and giving fish back to the shop is a little strange. I could never imagine doing that? Unless it’s a one off where it’d dawned on me that I’d bitten off more than I could chew. But the rest sounds normal - your kids and husband should just get on with their own lives and mind their business.

I'd probably have got another two 'trains' in rebellion. However, the part I'd pay attention to is the mention by one of them that they are worried it will take over again. It sounds like maybe you get obsessive about them to the exclusion of all else? These are also living creatures and you should take responsibility for them for their natural lifespan. It's not something you can box up and take out again.

I don't think rehoming because the fish outgrew their environment or because they are fish from a dead/moving relative is comparable to getting rid because you get bored...

I know you’ve tried to explain the ‘reeling’ and ‘shell shocked’ wording but you need a thicker skin as this is a massive overreaction to your family.

How do pet store accept fish returns? 🐟 What if the fish being returned are sick and infect other fish in the store? Surely they don't have the space to keep them separated?

I’m presuming you swap them in a hobby group, not giving/selling them to ransoms who might not care for them.

randoms, not ransoms!

That hasn’t been mentioned on this thread. Have you been looking at her other threads?

God, I hate it when PPs keep hassling an OP to give information that could be outing or when OP doesn’t want to go into details.

OP, remember that the mean girls hang around in AIBU looking for sport! If you get upset, they win.

Enjoy your hobby. I’m sure you’re not neglecting the fish, or expecting DH and the kids to look after them, like kids do to mum when they lose interest. I’m presuming you swap them in a hobby group, not giving/selling them to ransoms who might not care for them.
I would ask DH and the kids all what’s bothering them. If it’s not something genuinely valid (eg you spend all evening talking to the fish and ignoring the humans, or you don’t look after the fish correctly), I’d tell them clearly that you have a right to a bit of your own time just as they do.

well yes but this person dumps them back at the petshop or puts them on gumtree.

To be honest I think this hobby is one that many people would dip in and out of. Fish can be so fragile and if they get sick etc there’s not a lot one can do and it’s depressing when any creature you care for dies. Couldn’t wait for the last of mine (40 years back) to go to the aquatic rainbow because it looked lonely and I was too disheartened to continue with the hobby.
OP you know what’s involved so I hope you get enjoyment from it. Cats would actually bring more joy!

OP I think you sound lovely, even though you are getting some serious stick here for being a part-time fish pimp 😂

I’d agree with you up to a point, but she says she’s only asked him to help her twice. At that level, I think it’s just one person doing something nice for someone else. My DH is a golfer. I sometimes clean his shoes for him because he’s quite lazy about it and it’s a nice thing I know he’ll appreciate. He’s spent a couple of hours today winding thread onto bobbins with me. Isn’t that what couples do for each other? Just nice things that the other will appreciate?

And she said that it doesn’t take her away from the family, while he disappeared for a few hours to do his.

I was totally on your side when it was "trains" but knowing it’s fishkeeping totally changes my mind. Their attitude did sound awful but honestly I’d be contemptuous of someone treating living creatures as so disposable.

i think they’re completely right to try to talk you out of it. I’m sure they could have done it more kindly but I don’t know how kind I’d be to someone taking up looking after pets then getting bored of them again and again and again,

£50 Dogs Trust? Blimey, I wish!

When my koi outgrew my pond, I re-homed him. He’d arrived at about 2 inches long and it’s just not true about fish growing to their environment, their organs can become crushed if the space isn’t big enough. My local shop wouldn’t take him back. There is a substantial Facebook community where excess/unwanted fish (you inherit your dad’s pond full of random fish but need to re-home so you can remove the pond to help sell the house, your dad had 6 huge aquariums built into his house then he goes into a home, for example) can be re-homed. It is fairly standard, ime. I’m debating what to do with my pond fish when we move next year 👀 looking for a house with a ready made pond👀

It drives me nuts to see my friend’s 2 goldfish stuck in the smallest ever tank, no filter, nothing. I think the OP sounds like she looks after her fish really well.