Boys you assumed were gay at school

It is not just you

and you have articulated exactly why I felt also this thread is off

Yeah I know some people jump straight to the its homophobic stuff - I never have but to me this thread just seems wrong.

As an ex teacher there are clearly young people who are so confused and it's made even harder by people outing them at school, calling them gay, talking openly or whispering about their sexuality. I know someone who only came out recently late in life, never married or had female partners. They have only told a few people and there is a mixture of oh wow that's a shock or he walked funny or sometimes dressed it. I felt bad that they've had to keep it hidden for so long, but then when some are faced with the above at school it sends them further back into the closet. It's just really sad.

So I guess it's natural that people make assumptions but just still think this post/thread is weird - but that's me.

I went to a girls' school. Some of the bullies there used to call me 'gay' or 'a lesbian'. I assume it was just because some of my behaviour (diagnosed ADHD as an adult) might have seemed strange to them, and back then in the early 1970's, calling someone 'gay' basically meant 'I think there is something different about you but I can't quite put my finger on it.'

I am not a lesbian. I do sometimes get mistaken for a man, but that's because I have short hair, and that is not because of some desire to look less female but because I have very thin hair which looks ridiculous when it's longer.

I have no idea whether any of the girls I was at school with did turn out to be lesbians. All the ones which pop up on my Facebook have been married for about 40 years to the same man, so I'm guessing not.

One boy who was relentlessly taunted for obviously being gay (but who denied it at the time as it would have been social suicide to admit it) is now openly gay.

I was friendly with another kid whom I assumed was gay, and almost fell over one time when he told me that he had a crush on a girl. He's now definitely out.

One other guy springs to mind who seems on Facebook to be happily married to a woman. When I see these posts, I wonder why I thought he was gay, why I was right about the others, and whether there are any real, identifiable markers of gayness.

Oh man…. Brace yourself! Wish I could be a fly on the wall during this “anecdote” sharing of yours 😆

You’ve inspired me. I’m going to check in and use it in a conversation today! Is there an age I should be looking for? Or will my kids be ok? Dh? Someone I bump into in town?

Well I went to a girls' school so it wasn't really something I thought about.

When I was at school everyone was calling each other gay, so I’d say out of 1500, a fair few weren’t.

No never accused of narcissism or being triggered

but I’d hazard a guess you have said others are a narcissist or asked if they’ve been “triggered”!

That’s a relief! I imagine some pretty quizzical faces if you tell this “anecdote” in RL 😆

No. Why would I? There are many replies I give which I don’t give a second thought to. Then someone like you rocks up 😂

Also do you have problems letting things go? Have you ever been accused of narcissism? Being triggered?
No reason. Just wondering.

Have you told your “anecdote” about having had 3 “lovely gay friends” to anyone in RL @Sometimeswinning ?

Asked me what before?

No. Why? Has someone asked you similar before?

I mean now you mention it…

Please say that he’s no longer friends with these “friends” and you never needed to meet / socialise with them @Turtledude ?!

“Hit a nerve”

oh dear. Just because I chuckled at you thinking it was relevant to throw in your “anecdote” that you have you proudly puffed out your chest “3 lovely gay friends”

I bet you liberally throw around “narcissist” and “are you triggered” too 🤭 @Sometimeswinning

What a fucking bizarre thread.

Assumption is the mother of all fuck ups

You assumed and you were wrong. I don't know what the point of your post is.

Is it also “hilarious” when gay people think they can spot straight people?

There was a guy from uni that I thought was struggling with his sexuality. At one point he even told me he thought he was and was really confimused. Then he got in with some christian group and started talking about how being gay was a sin and all that nonsense.

We both ended up reducing contact, I was uncomfortable with the way he spoke about homosexuality and I think he was awkward about why had said. He ended up marrying a woman and had 2 kids. A few years ago another friend saw his profile on Grindr.

why do people care so much about other people’s sexuality? Genuinely, why does it matter?!

Why does it matter?!

Many people assumed my Ds2 was gay as all his friends were girls.

He has been happily with one of them for 20 years now. Married with 2 teenage daughters.

My husband, all this friends thought he was gay. All because he was respectful about women never catcalled or made teenage sexual comments as he thought it was weird and disrespectful.

Hes a great husband, respectful and we do equal chores, takes on feedback.

There were no gay kids openly gay in my school class as come from a rough area. The 2 gay kids that were in my school went away and are both now married to their love for life partners. No is surprised or is bothered and everyone happy for them.