To think I’m not a nice person?

You just sound like a selfish twat.
There's lots around.
Don't try and dignify it with a 'diagnosis'

It’s not that you’re not nice. But your lack of empathy is what a psychologist would deem sociopathic. Perhaps seek professional advice as your sociopathic tendencies could be very damaging to your children

There's an awful lot of projection on this thread, OP

let me guess… you liberally throw around such terms of “narcissist” and “triggered” and so on.

And I would argue that your post is surely “projection” ( 🤮) because you relate to the Op

I think it's normal to have selfish or uncharitable thoughts and to sometimes act that way too. But rushing to use the disabled loo ahead of someone in genuine need isn't normal behaviour. Most people have learned to have some empathy and to understand how social interaction works.

You're further along the shitty behaviour than most people.

Most of us would admit to agreeing with some of your points, but the ones where your behaviour could cause emotional or physical suffering to a person tip you over the edge into being a bad person.

OP maybe it would help to go out of your way to deliberately make small gestures of kindness in your day.

Just little things like letting holding the door for people, being the car that stops to let a pedestrian cross the road, smiling and engaging with the staff at the supermarket check out. Just make it a mission to do one little thing that you didn't have to do every day.

Most times people will react positively to those small gestures - you'll get a smile or a thanks back. And that feels rewarding, you feel a bit more positive about yourself and you feel like a better person. Which is positively reinforcing - you start to feel like the type of person who does kind things and so you're more likely to do more of them in the future and change your image of yourself.

It's just building a habit really. Like an unfit person can make little steps to do more exercise, and then see themselves differently as a result.

There's an awful lot of projection on this thread, OP. The truth is that all these people who think they are so nice and kind and empathetic are absolutely revelling in the opportunity to be vicious and superior towards you. You can guarantee that plenty of them have blind spots of their own. Most people are self absorbed and selfish. For instance, last night I was at a hobby club and had all my stuff out and someone came in and wanted to sit in my space, so I moved myself and all my crap to another seat, and she didn't so much as look at me or thank me. Bet she thinks she's a lovely person though!

You're normal, and refreshingly honest, which makes a change.

The behaviours you've listed are quite selfish, sure. It makes me wonder what happened in your early life. I wonder if you had to develop patterns of behaviour where you looked after yourself, and shut yourself off from interactions with others, because you couldn't trust the adults around you to look after you.

Most of the time, our behaviour is a communication about what has happened to us.

Like many people now you seem a bit entitled and grabby.Rushing past a wheelchair user to grab the loo! who does that. Not stopping for pedestrians who are disabled.I have a stick, and thankfully people let me go when they see it.You seem almost proud of it. I would have a long hard look at yourself.You will be old one day. or may not get around so quickly when you slow down .Try and be kinder and work on your empathy!

It's literally a memoire. A memoire. A book about herself and her life.

OP uou have said you can be nice and you have listed lots of examples of being selfish or lacking in empathy.
Would you detail situations where you have been or are nice.
its hard to comment without a balanced look at how and when you behave nicely

Yeah, you generally sound like a bit of a douche. The type of person that others talk about being mean and selfish behind their backs. Complete lack of empathy for others is a psychopathic trait. How was your childhood? Have you ever made any active actions that hurt others? You mentioned the not stopping to let people cross - have you ever endangered anyone else? Person or animal? If it hasn’t went that far and its just a lack of thought for anyone other than yourself then I’d suggest actibely trying to change your thoughtless behaviour. You’re intelligent enough to list examples here and ask for our opinion so you can think about the way you act and try to be better. If you don’t care enough to change then you need to accept a life of being unliked. People notice when other people act unkind. Even if you think it goes unnoticed its not - you’re being judged and making a name for yourself.

Being kind costs nothing. The world doesn’t revolve around you. With all the negativity in the world nowadays kindness is almost all we have left. Theres no room for folk who barge past disabled people into a disabled toilet etc. Up to you to sort it.

I was kind of with you until the disabled toilet access…. That’s just a dick move.

It’s all rather childish and meeeeee OP

The feet on train seats for example, the behaviour of a poorly brought up 14 year old.

It wouldn’t be so depressing if it weren’t for the fact your child will be watching and learning

I was all for your honesty and self-knowledge until I got to the one about people crossing the road.

Yeah, you're a bit of a shitty person.

I can agree with some of your viewpoint, the gender reveals and just wanting other children to go away for example but the disabled toilet one is too far.

I do however think that most people will only actually care about their immediate family and not really give a fuck about anyone else.

Also agree though that you are immature and attention seeking OP.

You sound immature. You act like a toddler who hasn't yet developed a superego. In your life your priority is to get what you want when you want it.

You say that you had more empathy when you were a young adult - to me that suggests that back then you were influenced by what other people thought of you. Now you are acting as if you are an unsupervised child - is it an unconscious rebellion against parental/authority figures you feel have let you down in some way?

You are showing your child how to be an adult. If that's ok with you, crack on.

“largely I think I’m mostly about myself/immediate family and couldn’t care less about anything else”

You may feel differently when equally shitty people like yourself treat your precious immediate family the way you do others. Let’s hope none of your family actually need to use the disabled toilet at any point in their life whilst some cunt runs in front of them so they can change their child.

You sound entitled, selfish and inconsiderate. It’s not genocide levels of badness, but I certainly wouldn’t be friends with you, and if you were in my social circle I’d avoid you and have very little respect for you.

However, making this post shows that you understand it’s a problem, so I don’t think you’re a hopeless case. If you can work on yourself and effect a meaningful change, I would have a lot of respect for you.

People tend to be happier when they’re prosocial (up to a point), so it’d probably also benefit you psychologically.

People telling OP she's a sociopath, a psychopath or a narcissist...I strongly suspect this is what she wants to hear, but the move towards pathologising every aspect of human behaviour is really damaging and leads people to think they're 'special' when they're just selfish. It also allows people to abdicate responsibility for their shitty behaviour.

Maybe OP is just a bit of a dick, and can be less of a dick if she chooses.

Oh dear!

You sound like a complete fucking arsehole tbh - I couldn't care less about stuff like crying kids at softplay, but always putting yourself ahead of others in some of the circumstances you've listed? Nope, Serious dick moves. Doubt you'll change if you actually just don't care though. Your selfish attitude seems to be prevalent among a lot of people right now. Do you also decline to ever give way to others when driving, or do you bull your way through on the wrong side of the road around an obstruction even if there's oncoming traffic?

But I thought you didn’t care?

Yep, you are vile.

@He1h

i hope the next time you get a train someone has done what you have done and put their shoes on the seats and their shoes had dog shit on them. A bit of dog shit on your coat may help you see the error of your ways