I volunteer in a charity shop and get on well with the female manager who is in her 30's. She is very open with us all about her family problems…she has no control over her wayward teenage daughter and her husband doesn't show her any love or affection. Apart from that, our relationship has been professional and based on mutual respect…. until last Sunday evening when she rang me just as I was having my meal and asked if I could pick her up and take her to collect a parcel from the locker at Tesco as she'd had a message saying that if it wasn't collected by midnight it would be sent back. She doesn't drive and I assumed her husband wasn't available so I dropped everything and went to pick her up from her house. I didn't expect to be out long and left jobs like washing up, bringing in the washing, putting clean sheets on my bed, watering the garden and taking the dog out. When she came out of the house I noticed she was dressed up as if for a night out, lots of makeup and perfume, mini dress, evening bag, heels etc. We went to pick up the parcel and then she wanted to go to the local pub and although I wasn't keen I said ok, but just half an hour because I'd got jobs at home (I wasn't even dressed for going out, needed a shower and clean clothes etc). I had an orange juice but she was knocking back the large size wines. At 9.30pm I popped home to fetch my dog as she's not used to being left on her own in the evening. My colleague was acting quite drunk when I got back to the pub and making a fool of herself chatting up strange men. People started telling me I need to take her home before she gets into trouble (apparently she'd been drinking whiskey as well as 5 large wines which I didn't know til the barmaid told me). She told me she was going to the toilet but was gone ages, I went to look for her and she was outside flirting with a couple of guys and seemed annoyed at me for saying we had to go.
She's quite a large lady and I'm small so it wasn't easy getting her into my car where she passed out. I drove her home but the house was in darkness and the door was locked. I phoned her husband several times but no answer. I went back to the car and managed to rouse her and she said her husband locks her out (I later found out that he leaves the side door open). She wanted me to drive her to some guy's house 8 miles away…she said he'd let her stay there. I made her phone him first before driving there and he didn't answer. She told me to just take her to his pub and he'd be fine about it and I didn't know what else to do. I couldn't take her to my place as I only have one bed. On the way she was telling me about her affairs with married men and justifying it because her husband wasn't showing her any love and attention. He is ex army and suffers PTSD, is also quite a bit older than her. We got to the pub and she told me to just leave her there and she'd be fine (I obviously didn't). The guy wasn't there so I ended up driving her around at midnight as she kept giving me new instructions as to where this guy might be. Her husband in the meantime messaged me to say sorry he'd missed my call but he'd been asleep and he said he'd left the side door open again and he asked if she was still drunk (probably someone had contacted him as they are well known in town). The guy she wanted me to take her to finally answered her phone and told her she couldn't stay there (I've since found out that he is engaged). I then drove her back to her home where her husband was now awake and let her in (still very drunk). It was half past midnight when I finally got home (five and a half hours after she first phoned me). I understand she is obviously going through a bad patch but I couldn't help feeling a bit angry and upset and like I'd been used. I'm 73, have COPD and never normally drive at night. I know I could have left the pub when she was on her third glass and let her get a taxi home but I felt responsible for her as I'd been the one to pick her up from her house in my car. She has rung and apologised and begged me not to tell anyone so I can't even talk about it to a friend. Am I being unreasonable feeling angry and like I was coerced into the whole thing especially as she was dressed up obviously for a night out but told me she just needed a lift to collect a parcel. Am I being unreasonable for feeling she totally disrespected me? Or was it my fault for letting her get so drunk in the first place. Thanks for reading.