To think DP’s friend should give him a lift home

He could get a taxi.
He could walk.
He could prep dinner before he leaves and cook it when he gets back, in return for a lift from you. He could also do any other chores that will be interrupted by you going out.

It's not the friends responsibility but it would be kind. But for all you know the friend maybe be going elsewhere away from home afterwards.

In afraid 20 minutes isn’t that much more than 10 minutes.
It would be nice if of the friend to offer but he shouldn’t ask.

I always drop my friend home because she doesn’t drive. But I do see her less than she’d like because I always factor in that I need to drop her home.

The thing is she would be more than happy to get the bus.

Well he's never going to do it if you keep picking him up. There's no way I'd interrupt a toddler evening meal bath bedtime routine for a man who wouldn't prioritise.said toddler. You are setting this up and knocking the pins down yourself it's got nothing to do with his friend.

Well that's the cost of your joint decision.

He drives, walks, pays for public transport or doesnt go.

And I bet he would pay it, because its always bloody men that are happy to throw money at costly convenience and women who feel stressed about how that £15 could buy something "sensible" so rearrange the world to revolve around their man.

Unless money is too tight then a taxi really is the best idea. 15 quid so you dont have to do nearly half an hour with a toddler slap bang in the middle of dinner time seems worth it.

Has the ride issue come up with the friend? Cause if they juat agreed ti meet up, it is possible he hasn't thought about it or was planning to offer when they do meet up. If I've been somewhere, usually the ride off Rd.clme when you're about to leave and not before the meet up.

Some of these responses seem very strange to me. He has tried and found it difficult for him. Some people do. He must have skills OP doesn't, that's how marriage works.

Ideally he'd learn, but it the meantime, it's not that big an ask. I'm sure if was a very frequent request OP would have mentioned that! If she really doesn't want to do it he can get a cab or ask his friend. I'm sure his friend asks him for favours occasionally.

Even if he could drive, he'd likely want/need a lift in this situation anyway.

You don't need to live rurally for bus services to be limited. We live in the centre of town and DD21 works in a business park a few miles away. She doesn't drive so relies on a bus. It doesn't go as far as the business park in the middle of the day and the last bus leaves the business park at 6.30pm.

This. It must be like having another child, all the adults figuring out how they're going to get him home. Can't he walk?

Really can’t believe you would put up with such a man-child. It’s truly disgusting when a healthy adult can’t (won’t) drive.

How would he react if you decided to do the same? Could you leave your toddler with DP for the evening, go out drinking, and then expect to be picked up??

lol, you're only doing a short trip.

Just feed your kid a bit earlier.

Tell your boyfriend to learn how to drive. That's not his friends problem.

If he can't drive he needs to consider a taxi fare part and parcel of the cost of going out.
You don't have to collect him, you're offering to. Same as friend, he doesn't have to and didn't offer.
I can't get on with adults who won't drive, and then expect others to ferry them around.

Oof. This is an ick trigger for me. It’s so…helpless? Lazy? Reliant?

Time for him to sort it out and learn.

Sounds very much like he would benefit from being regularly inconvenienced by his choice not to at least try to learn to drive.
No way would I expect his friends (or you) to plug the gap in the basic adulting requirement of getting yourself from A to B

Sorry but that is pathetic….

As a driver that’s spent years ferrying my non-driver friends about, it’s gets too much.

Your husband needs to learn to drive and stop expecting you or his friends to drive him or give him lifts.

I really don't think I could have any respect for a man, with children, no medical issues, who can't drive.

It's not friend's responsibility to drive your partner around. You're unreasonable to expect that.

Nor is it yours. Shocker, I know.

It's your partner's responsibility to get himself around.

He chose not to drive. The consequences are, it's harder for him to do stuff and he either uses public transport, pays for rides, or tries to get people to chauffeur him around at their time and expense and inconvenience. You're willing to do that.

Fwiw, I quite like giving lifts. It's an easy favour to do and if you've got favours in the bank, you can ask others when you need it. (I don't mean DH, where it's just normal to help each other out).

I would expect him to budget for a taxi home.

I am wondering how late he is planning on staying out if there are no buses that run then, this seems very unreasonable you are having to keep a toddler awake or disturb them when they are asleep to take them in the car to pick him up.

I don't think it's fair to expect his friend to drop him off - friend may have made their own transport arrangements (if they are going to the pub for example and they want a drink).

I always pick dh up from town as we don't have much public transport, unless it's really inconvenient in which case he gets a taxi. We never expect anyone to bring him home.

In my 30s and my DH has still 5 friends who don’t drive. Nightmare. They expect him to drive around and cater to them, always going out of his way with no thanks. We intentionally don’t offer anymore as was just so inconsiderate. Your DH not driving is a you and him thing, his friend is provably sick of it.

How is a 10 to 12.5 min car journey only going to take 5 minutes on an electric bike?

I'd be happy to do it if asked, but it probably wouldn't occur to me if not, or if it did, it wouldn't be until I said "do you need a lift" as we were leaving.

DP needs to ask his mate.

However, I'd also do it for a husband I loved and who also helped me out regularly, especially to save "family money" for a taxi.