Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Comment to air hostess

383 replies

Backfromthebrink · 13/08/2025 21:44

Just arrived on holiday and I need the wise opinions of the Mumsnet community to help me decide if I’m being super unreasonable or if I’m right to feel pissed off.

On the plane off on holiday with my DH and DD9. Half way into the journey and the air hostess (think blonde, slim, attractive) comes down the aisle selling scratch cards, Prize being another holiday. She gets to our row and DH asks for x5 tickets and cheekily says “if I win, do you come too?” to the lady selling. I’m mortified and give her an apologetic look. She gives me a somewhat sympathetic look and I’m just feeling like the biggest dickhead.

I can’t bring myself to speak to my DH out of disgust and he laughs it off and makes me feel like I’m creating a drama for no reason. Feel so upset that he would humiliate me in front of my face.

Honest opinions please. Should I have laughed along or would you be fuming? Thank you!

OP posts:
NetZeroZealot · 14/08/2025 06:56

fluffiphlox · 13/08/2025 22:01

Who says ‘air hostess’ these days? I think you’re both from the 1970s.
Anyway, he needs to be more of a grown up.

Trolly dolly

MyDeftDuck · 14/08/2025 06:56

I would have looked at the cabin crew apologetically and said “ oh do excuse my husband, he missed his medication deliberately this morning as it makes him very drowsy and he was SO excited to be coming on an aeroplane weren’t you xxxx” whilst patting his arm condescendingly.

JustPinkFinch · 14/08/2025 06:53

Him: “if I win, do you come too?”

You: "she's not interested in your tiny dick darling"

(please store that for next time)

StrandedInJune · 14/08/2025 06:52

Oh man, I would have just rolled my eyes and told him to stop being such an embarrassment and he would have laughed at himself and everyone would probably have been just fine. Christ almighty. This was just a cheeky comment. He is going to admire other women and hopefully you will admire other men now and then. And maybe the hostess found it a bit uncomfortable but I think most women and men can still enjoy a bit of flirtation, even in the workplace. I hope so anyway. What an incredibly dull, neutered world we are heading for if this stupid dad joke caused you to be in floods of tears. Calm the farm.

feelingfree17 · 14/08/2025 06:51

Trust me, that remark would have been taken straight back to the galley. Man (child) in 32B is a creep.

Why would he for one moment think she would be impressed with that comment.

Horsie · 14/08/2025 06:51

Christmasbear1 · 14/08/2025 01:01

Since when do people not call them air hostesses anymore? I'm so confused....

Oh God, since the early Nineties, if not earlier! It's in the same category as "lady doctor." 🤮

Horsie · 14/08/2025 06:45

nopiesleftinthisvehicle · 14/08/2025 00:14

I don't think that's too bad, it can be hard breaking from words you grew up with.
I still say policewoman sometimes 😶‍🌫️ and Prince Charles 😁

Show quote history

I didn't know "policewoman" was bad. We say "policeman" after all.

TheRealGoose · 14/08/2025 06:42

I think he was a knob, trying to flirt with the cabin crew, but if I’m honest I think sitting weeping on the coach in front of your daughter isn’t great either, and I’d be concerned for your mental health. A quiet word in private is all that was required, or to embarass him back , something like god that woman looked like she had the proper ick when you tried to flirt, so embarassed for you, it gave me the ick too.

EllyRoff · 14/08/2025 06:42

Sat on the coach with tears streaming down your face? Really? 😂😂

FFS

Id just embarrass him and make out you cringed yourself inside out with how silly and desperate he made himself look. Then make out you feel a bit sorry for him.

YelloDaisy · 14/08/2025 06:42

I could def see me making the same joke to a young good looking steward (or even an old good looking steward)

BlueandPinkSwan · 14/08/2025 06:36

Backfromthebrink · 13/08/2025 21:55

Thank you for your comments so far. I’m sat on the transfer coach with tears streaming down my face.

Wtaf? He's a knob but getting that upset about it, really?

Horserider5678 · 14/08/2025 06:35

Backfromthebrink · 13/08/2025 21:55

Thank you for your comments so far. I’m sat on the transfer coach with tears streaming down my face.

Now that is an over reaction! Is there something else wrong in your relationship! What he said is totally icky but unless there’s more I wouldn’t be crying!

Horsie · 14/08/2025 06:27

tripleginandtonic · 14/08/2025 06:12

That is a total over reaction to a flippant albeit cheap comment.You're spoiling the holiday before it starts.

Show quote history

OP, can you plse clarify that you meant tears of laughter? I think that's probably what you meant, since right before you say "Thanks for the comments."

Horsie · 14/08/2025 06:26

MorrisZapp · 13/08/2025 23:48

Cabin crew is the group term, it doesn't really work in the singular.

Show quote history

You could say "a crew member."

I agree with others that "air hostess" is really cringey these days. That term went out with the ark.

AtomHeartMotherOfGod · 14/08/2025 06:21

OlympicProcrastinator · 13/08/2025 21:58

I would actually consider divorcing my husband over this. If he wants to flirt with an air hostess he can fuck off and be with one then.

I appreciate most mumsnetters would think I’m a lunatic but I posted so you know you are not alone feeling hurt and tearful.

Yeah, me too. Prize c*.

Horsie · 14/08/2025 06:21

LeafyLou · 13/08/2025 23:18

I hope a really attractive man carries your bags into the hotel. You should say, “You make it look so effortless. My husband was struggling with them at home. Thank you.”

Just a little quip to put DH on his toes lol.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Horsie · 14/08/2025 06:13

TesChique · 13/08/2025 21:57

Thats a bit much

Show quote history

i thought OP meant tears of laughter at the responses?

tripleginandtonic · 14/08/2025 06:12

Backfromthebrink · 13/08/2025 21:55

Thank you for your comments so far. I’m sat on the transfer coach with tears streaming down my face.

That is a total over reaction to a flippant albeit cheap comment.You're spoiling the holiday before it starts.

whistlesandbells · 14/08/2025 06:11

YANBU for your turd of a DH buying scratch cards alone. That would be enough to give me the ick.
His comment is out of line. I don’t think your reaction is off.

Horsie · 14/08/2025 06:10

LighthouseTeaCup · 13/08/2025 21:54

I wouldn't laugh, it wasn't funny. I wouldn't feel humiliated or be fuming though, assuming your DH is generally not a tosser, and this was a shocking one off thing for him to say

I'd tell DH that he came across as misogynistic and I felt embarrassed on his behalf. He'd probably try to play it down. I'd ask him if he's happy to be viewed by others in that way. I'd ask him to think about how I'd feel if randomers in my workplace objectified me. I'd be very calm. And if he accused me of creating drama, I'd say "not at all, I'm just very surprised. I never thought of you as a misogynist until today. And I'm curious why you don't seem to mind other people seeing you as that"

I think it was sexist rather than misogynist.

YellowZebraStripes · 14/08/2025 06:09

Jorgua · 14/08/2025 05:20

Grow up. Why the fuck does he get a pass for that.

Show quote history

Its not attractive behavior.

YellowZebraStripes · 14/08/2025 06:08

I had a partner once who - slightly different scenario - when we were out at a party, we were sat on a sofa and people were dancing. He could not take his eyes off one of the younger women dancing. I saw him doing it, still doing it, so I looked at him and said his name really loudly in a sort of exclaiming way. He looked at me and said sorry. So he fully knew what I was saying and why, without me even saying it. Unfortunately it's a trait of patronising sexism and inappropriateness as many years later I've seen this in him to a degree (he is long my ex). I'd talk about how these women must have to put up with this all the time.

Horsie · 14/08/2025 06:06

JustFish · 14/08/2025 05:40

Just tell him he's turning into a leering throwback , a sexist boring old fart and that his comment was creepy, cringeworthy and absolutely the opposite of witty or charming. That both you and the stewardess had vicarious embarrassment for him, and it's giving you serious ick

Brilliant! Spot-on!

Horsie · 14/08/2025 06:06

Ugh. That was a creepy thing for him to say. Poor woman. I bet she gets remarks like that all the time from male passengers. I'd be cringing with second-hand embarrassment, OP - and wondering what he says to women when you're not around. He sounds like a dinosaur.

FairKoala · 14/08/2025 06:00

I would have taken what he said as a joke. Hardly worth crying over it and ruining the start of the holiday on a throwaway comment.

But then I have “Mandy” in her calipers playing in my head, walking down the aisle of a plane shouting “Scratch cards, get your scratch cards.”

Swipe left for the next trending thread