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Original poster

Comment to air hostess

383 replies

Backfromthebrink · 13/08/2025 21:44

Just arrived on holiday and I need the wise opinions of the Mumsnet community to help me decide if I’m being super unreasonable or if I’m right to feel pissed off.

On the plane off on holiday with my DH and DD9. Half way into the journey and the air hostess (think blonde, slim, attractive) comes down the aisle selling scratch cards, Prize being another holiday. She gets to our row and DH asks for x5 tickets and cheekily says “if I win, do you come too?” to the lady selling. I’m mortified and give her an apologetic look. She gives me a somewhat sympathetic look and I’m just feeling like the biggest dickhead.

I can’t bring myself to speak to my DH out of disgust and he laughs it off and makes me feel like I’m creating a drama for no reason. Feel so upset that he would humiliate me in front of my face.

Honest opinions please. Should I have laughed along or would you be fuming? Thank you!

OP posts:
NasiDagang · 14/08/2025 13:16

SereneCoralDog · 14/08/2025 03:59

Reading lots of the comments is so depressing. So many women have such low standards and expectations for life partners...and worryingly high thresholds for the appalling shit they'll put up with and the awful behaviour they're determined to laugh off.

It's really no wonder that there are so many threads on here about men who've up and left or cheated or lashed out or worse when the woman claims to be blindsided because he was such a nice guy.

Women are training themselves to not even recognise red flags anymore and are joining in the misogyny by telling those that do to lighten up and calm down 🙄.

HINT AND TIP - your oh making smutty 'jokes' to random women right in front of your face is a MASSIVE red flag and one you should take note of.

My ex-husband used to do this and I've put up with his disgusting behaviour for a while. He ended up having an affair because I've had low expectations in my marriage.You are totally right that we need to raise our standards.

Anotherbeeloudglade · 14/08/2025 13:07

PigletSanders · 14/08/2025 13:03

Ok. This bullshit “boys will be boys” mentality HAS TO STOP.

Stop excusing awful behaviour by men. There’s no excuse.

Secondly, can posters please stop derailing over using ‘air hostess’.

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So true. If my husband had ever come out with anything this sleazy, creepy and embarrassing - I mean ever at any point in our relationship at all - we would not be married. But he is a normal, masculine properly formed adult man, not a sniggering, grubby, creepy little man child with his mummy making excuses for him as some of the commenters on this thread seem to tolerate.

IntoTheFringe · 14/08/2025 13:07

FamilyPhoto · 14/08/2025 12:04

No its not.
Safety is their main responsibility on board.
Educate yourself, preferably before you spout more crap.

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It's crazy that people don't get this. If there was an emergency onboard I wonder if they would they expect the cabin crew to finish handing out snacks before they addressed it...

fluffiphlox · 14/08/2025 13:04

Emilysmum90 · 14/08/2025 12:50

I never said that either? 😂Have you got your reading glasses on dear? Don't worry it's easy to get confused when you're making friends left right and centre.

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I inferred your ‘female solidarity’ from your defence of the woman in question. I’m sure it was you that said she must have been dashing round like a blue arsed fly etc. but it’s certainly easy to miss things in a busy thread.

Anotherbeeloudglade · 14/08/2025 13:03

This reply has been deleted

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I would have absolutely ripped him a new arsehole and right there and then - but I do understand that not everyone is like me. And yes, there are some right cows on here, just loving their little digs and snipes. Poor OP, I hope she went away and never came back.

PigletSanders · 14/08/2025 13:03

silkypyjamas · 14/08/2025 10:00

I would have cringed and teased my DH about the comment but crying about it is a bit OTT. My Dad is still a creepy old bloke who thinks he's funny with his cheeky chappy inappropriate comments, doesn't make it right, but nothing my Mum would've divorced him over 60 years ago. Men are just childish and think they are funny. Just move on don't let it spoil your holiday.

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Ok. This bullshit “boys will be boys” mentality HAS TO STOP.

Stop excusing awful behaviour by men. There’s no excuse.

Secondly, can posters please stop derailing over using ‘air hostess’.

the5thgoldengirl · 14/08/2025 12:59

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

Anotherbeeloudglade · 14/08/2025 12:58

hattie43 · 14/08/2025 11:49

What a loser you are . Not only has the OP had to put up with an idiot husband she comes on here hoping for some empathy and you turn up .
God, women moan about misogyny yet they are often each others worst enemy .

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Right. The ones going on and on and on at her about her terminology are nothing but bullying turds.

the5thgoldengirl · 14/08/2025 12:58

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This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

Cherrytree86 · 14/08/2025 12:57

One word - ICK!!
he’s just made himself look so unattractive

notimagain · 14/08/2025 12:56

EvilEdna44 · 14/08/2025 12:39

A lot of us are actually from the 70’s. Not sure what we can do about that?

Air hostess is a bit of an outdated term yes, but it was actually the normal description for cabin crew back then… “in the olden days”.

Mark my words, one day you will find that the everyday phrases you use will become old fashioned and derided, too.

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The past was indeed another country...those easily offended might want to look away now rather than watch the 1969 BOAC advert below.

BTW agree with a pp re terminolgy, Cabin Crew work in the cabin, those on the flight deck are usually referred to as Flight crew or Tech Crew (as in technical).

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=wH7WW0x_lx0

Emilysmum90 · 14/08/2025 12:50

fluffiphlox · 14/08/2025 12:36

It’s not a very sisterly term though is it, especially from someone who claims female solidarity? Ah well.

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I never said that either? 😂Have you got your reading glasses on dear? Don't worry it's easy to get confused when you're making friends left right and centre.

Netcurtainnelly · 14/08/2025 12:50

IntoTheFringe · 14/08/2025 10:59

No one should be required to "banter" while doing their job. It was up to her husband to not make such a comment in the first place. Sadly he failed.

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Ok I stand corrected on this one.

fluffiphlox · 14/08/2025 12:47

EvilEdna44 · 14/08/2025 12:39

A lot of us are actually from the 70’s. Not sure what we can do about that?

Air hostess is a bit of an outdated term yes, but it was actually the normal description for cabin crew back then… “in the olden days”.

Mark my words, one day you will find that the everyday phrases you use will become old fashioned and derided, too.

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I was born in the late 1950’s 😂

Netcurtainnelly · 14/08/2025 12:46

tellmesomethingtrue · 13/08/2025 22:44

It’s cabin crew.
yes he was disrespectful. Would he have said that to a male cabin crew member?

No because he's not gay.

MasterBeth · 14/08/2025 12:45

It's the kind of prickish comment I am not in the least bit surprised someone's husband on Mumsnet has said and I would be mortified if anyone close to me (including my adult sons!) said.

EvilEdna44 · 14/08/2025 12:39

fluffiphlox · 13/08/2025 22:01

Who says ‘air hostess’ these days? I think you’re both from the 1970s.
Anyway, he needs to be more of a grown up.

A lot of us are actually from the 70’s. Not sure what we can do about that?

Air hostess is a bit of an outdated term yes, but it was actually the normal description for cabin crew back then… “in the olden days”.

Mark my words, one day you will find that the everyday phrases you use will become old fashioned and derided, too.

MrsSkylerWhite · 14/08/2025 12:38

Oh god, what a wanker. Does he often behave like this, when your daughter is around?

fluffiphlox · 14/08/2025 12:36

Emilysmum90 · 14/08/2025 12:32

I never called you a loser, that was someone else.

I stand by the bitch comment.

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It’s not a very sisterly term though is it, especially from someone who claims female solidarity? Ah well.

Tidekiln · 14/08/2025 12:35

Fruitsherbert · 14/08/2025 12:17

Can't believe how many people on here think the following is ok:

Openly flirting with someone else in front of you.
I flirt; dh presumably flirts. We both look. But not with the other sitting right there!

Reducing a professional woman to a sex object.

Modelling the kind of behaviour to nod daughter.

Even if it was a stupid, ill thought out remark, he didn't have to say it out loud.

I agree it was not a good thing to do and I would not be happy either but I think it's too much to say he reduced her to a sex object, he just thought she was attractive and presumably cheery. And as for not having to say it out loud unfortunately I myself have very occasionally said something out loud then regretted it, it does happen. But I agree with OP I wouldn't be happy if my partner did that to me.

Emilysmum90 · 14/08/2025 12:32

fluffiphlox · 14/08/2025 12:21

’Loser’ ‘bitch’. Do you enjoy name calling? Oh dear.

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I never called you a loser, that was someone else.

I stand by the bitch comment.

Ownerofbagpuss · 14/08/2025 12:25

Regarding terminology as this seems a topic here. Cabin crew are the crew operating in the cabin itself, flight crew are the pilots. My husband is an airline pilot. I was never insulted by the term air hostess as it was a common description years ago and generally never said disrespectfully, although as I said it’s 25 years ago since I left so maybe crew nowadays don’t like it. Worst I got called to my face was ‘tart with a cart’ that some bloke thought hilarious, it’s very tedious dealing with such dicks! 🙄

Luckyingame · 14/08/2025 12:22

Well, my husband never made such a comment (20 years married) and probably never will, but I definitely wouldn't shed tears over this.
A bit of an overreaction.

fluffiphlox · 14/08/2025 12:21

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

’Loser’ ‘bitch’. Do you enjoy name calling? Oh dear.

Fruitsherbert · 14/08/2025 12:17

Can't believe how many people on here think the following is ok:

Openly flirting with someone else in front of you.
I flirt; dh presumably flirts. We both look. But not with the other sitting right there!

Reducing a professional woman to a sex object.

Modelling the kind of behaviour to nod daughter.

Even if it was a stupid, ill thought out remark, he didn't have to say it out loud.