Wedding no show. Was I unreasonable to block her?

I would as well.

She did message her and her friend ignored the message

Is there any possibility that she has a different number now and someone else replied to your texts?

Some people treat others atrociously then immediately blame them for being overly sensitive or emotional when the friend stands up for themselves. Its obviously far easier than admitting she's been a nasty bitch, I've seen it a few times with some absolute twats all of whom I've now cut off.

Thank god she lives 2 hours away and you won't run into her. Don't speak to her again, there is absolutely no reason she couldn't have still messaged you the day after the wedding if it was a genuine emergency like the whole family getting norovirus.

I would contact the husband too and ask about the missed call as you've had a few weird voicemails late at night... embarrass him into reminding his twatty wife she's not a nasty 14 year old in the common room.

Me too. I would be wondering about her mental health and/or domestic abuse. Sometimes not everything is as it seems.

This.

Lucky escape I would say. Sorry that happened. I hope you have other lovely friends.

Not turning up to a wedding when OP has paid for food/drink for a family of four with no apology or explanation is also quite an extreme thing to do. OP was obviously hurt and understandably pissed off.

OP didn't post her passive-aggressive post until over a week after the wedding, so her 'friend' had plenty of time and opportunity to explain her absence from OP's wedding before she was blocked. She just didn't bother. The fact that her friend was posting pictures of herself and her family out and about on the day of OP's wedding was just rubbing salt into OP's wound.

Well it's your call, but I would have maybe messaged her to see what her response was. It was given your comments about her SM potentially very inconsiderate of her - but blocking her before you found out seems childish.

Sometimes people behave in unacceptable ways and it is okay to draw a line and say that you won't accept it. You don't have to think of all kinds of permutations that could make it acceptable, downplaying your own feelings and making it unreasonable to be upset and hurt by her behaviour. You are allowed to prioritise your own feelings. She let you down and cost you a lot of money on a very special day. You are not unreasonable to cut her off. The way she has behaved now suggests that wasn't a bad decision to make.

I think everyone on here is trying to be really kind and defend your friend, but really her behaviour is completely unacceptable. If I was admitted to hospital or had a real problem the day of someone’s wedding, at least 48 hours later I would’ve sent a message via my husband, or another family member,
to apologise. You have not had any of that.

you are perfectly entitled to block this person and leave her out of your life. If you continue to have her on social media, you’ll be forced to face her photographs all of the time. You sent her a message, and gave her the right of reply. Instead of calling you to apologise to explain you got a missed call from the husband‘s phone and some unkind voicemails. Block and delete and leave it. You are not being childish. We are not put on this earth to be punching bags for immature or damaged people.

Please don't waste anymore time and energy on this. If you get in contact it could result in more late night calls they are obviously a bit bonkers and you don't need this stress in your life. They are not nice people, cut them off, block all numbers and move on.
Trust me OP karma always wins out in the end and nobody needs this drama.

My guess would be you thought you had "just" lost contact, but for her there was some perceived falling out or offence given. This was her chance at some petty revenge- getting you to pay for meals etc that she had no intention of taking.

Sometimes you can't get "closure". It is not worth the head space.

I am sorry that such a good friendship has ended like this.

I would not make any effort to get in contact.

Why are so many people making excuses for the friend being a flaky bitch?

The OP had already given her the opportunity for an explanation - she'd previously messaged her about the no-show and got no response. Plus, she'd seen on her social media that she was out enjoying herself and baking with her kids on the day she was meant to be at the wedding, so the OP already knew that she wasn't unwell or going through a crisis or anything like that. There's nothing childish about getting rid of someone who treats you that badly.

By contrast, calling someone who has blocked you - when you were the one who had ghosted them in the first place! - to giggle and call them a bitch on voicemail IS extremely childish.

Honestly, OP, this woman sounds nuts.

I’d be unblocking everyone and trying to get to the bottom of this - something doesn’t sound right!

Double post, sorry.

See if that’s what they were doing is it really very childish? She was trying to find out if she really had been blocked so got a friend to call husbands phone, and then when it connected friend panicked, giggled and hung up.

Yes, I think sending a passive-aggressive text and then blocking her was an odd response. I’d have been worried and called to check she was ok.

Blocking is quite an extreme thing to do and took away her ability to explain or apologise. She may well have been really hurt and frustrated by that, leading to the silly calls.

I would hazard a guess that she thought you may have blocked her and when drinking with mates tried calling you from friends/husbands phones to see if they connect whilst hers doesn’t. Very childish.

OP, how weird! It sounds as though her not coming to the wedding was a lucky escape all round. Imagine how she could have messed up the whole day!

It sounds as though you haven't seen much of her over the years, and unfortunately people can change... sometimes into a nasty piece of work.

The money wasted on her no-show was money well spent if having her out of your life was the end result.

Snap! I literally posted the same thought at the same time 😅

I would message her and her husband, on both their phones along the lines of,

'I'm very disappointed you didn't have the common courtesy to let me know you and your family weren't coming to my wedding despite RSVP-ing that you were as recently as X date. We could have invited other people, even fairly last minute, rather than host 4/5 empty seats which we still had to pay £££ for for the meals that weren't eaten. I can't imagine that you yourself would want to be treated this way by someone you thought was a friend, a friend who said they were looking forward to coming. Instead, you just didn't show up, didn't apologise, didn't explain, didn't reach out, and instead decided to make prank phone calls calling me a bitch on your husband's phone and what I presume are your friends' phones in the middle of the night X evening. I would like that behaviour to stop or I will be reaching out to the police for advice re harassing phone calls and providing them with all the phone numbers that have been used. I hope this will be the end of it. Wishing you the life you deserve.'

No you don't. You can tell her you were upset and acted rashly, but is everything OK, does she need anything.

I wonder if she is being controlled by her husband.