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AIBU?

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Original poster

Dm wants me to forgo car seats. Wwyd?

155 replies

Carseatdrama · 12/08/2025 12:19

So we are going on holiday this week. Df has offered to drive us the ten miles to the airport which was gratefully received. It's about 10 miles, on motorway and national roads. Dc are 6 and 7 so have car seats.

Dm wants to wave us off at the airport and has just had a massive go at me for insisting on using car seats resulting in her hanging up when I didn't change my mind. Me and dc could fit in the back with no car seats but not with. She thinks im being ridiculous for insisting on putting them in them and therefore ruining her idea of being able to wave them off. She could say bye to them at my house before we go too.

Df is a taxi driver not to dripfeed so can get away with this as people would presume its a fare paying job so normal laws don't apply.

My take is that it's an unnecessary risk and I'm not comfortable with it. Df offered to drop her off at the airport before coming back to pick us up but she didn't want to sit in greggs for an hour.

Yabu - it's not a big deal, just ditch the car seats
Yanbu - safety first!

OP posts:
Ihatelittlefriendsusan · 12/08/2025 12:37

Your mum is being a dick.

Safety first.

teksquad · 12/08/2025 12:37

Jesus christ, get an uber with booster seats.

I can't think of anything worse than having my mother waving me off at an airport, even if I was emigrating. Have you done an airport drop off recenlty? They are hectic and will be insanley busy in August. Why would you want someone flapping around getting in the way when you're trying to find the bag drop etc?

cranberryshortcake · 12/08/2025 12:35

So she’d rather risk your children’s lives than sit in Gregg’s for an hour?

She’s incredibly selfish.

GlaikitWeeNyaff · 12/08/2025 12:34

You are going on holiday, not emigrating forever - she needs to get a grip.

Nomorenonsense2025 · 12/08/2025 12:34

Carseatdrama · 12/08/2025 12:31

Yeah, the alternative would be to ask my grandad or we could use public transport.

I'm glad most seem to have the same response.

No, I don't know why she thinks it's necessary. We're literally away for a week so not that long.

Whatever you do, don't let her win. And remember in future, it doesn't matter - not at all - what she wants when that clashes with your decisions as a mother.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 12/08/2025 12:33

ChaToilLeam · 12/08/2025 12:31

Your children's safety greatly outweighs your mother's feelings! You'd never forgive yourself if there was an accident. Tell them NO, firmly.

Just imagine! Would be beyond awful, and there’s absolutely no need.

EvenMoreCrisps · 12/08/2025 12:33

You don't need to justify basic safety with the woman, or doubt yourself.

Just tell her you don't require being waved at, thanks though.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 12/08/2025 12:32

Carseatdrama · 12/08/2025 12:31

Yeah, the alternative would be to ask my grandad or we could use public transport.

I'm glad most seem to have the same response.

No, I don't know why she thinks it's necessary. We're literally away for a week so not that long.

I’d just take public transport but that’s how I do get to the airport when I go (but there’s a straight train to the nearest airport from us).

ChaToilLeam · 12/08/2025 12:31

Your children's safety greatly outweighs your mother's feelings! You'd never forgive yourself if there was an accident. Tell them NO, firmly.

Original poster
Carseatdrama · 12/08/2025 12:31

Yeah, the alternative would be to ask my grandad or we could use public transport.

I'm glad most seem to have the same response.

No, I don't know why she thinks it's necessary. We're literally away for a week so not that long.

OP posts:
parietal · 12/08/2025 12:30

Can’t a 6 and 7 year old sit on the £5 booster seats from Tesco and be safe but still have space for 3 in the back? But if you want them in big seats, that is your choice.

dogcatkitten · 12/08/2025 12:29

It's when you think it's only once and it will be fine that accidents happen. If she won't wait for an hour in the airport could you go first and do the waiting? Assuming you trust them to use the seatbelts if you're not there to supervise.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr · 12/08/2025 12:27

Wow. Stand up for yourself and protect your children. She is unbelievably unreasonable!

FloraBotticelli · 12/08/2025 12:26

This isn’t a car seat problem, it’s a narcissistic mother and enabler dad problem.

You've got a choice to either get the lift from them and engage with all the arguments and their demands. Or you get a different taxi/transport in peace. Which would you prefer?

If you haven’t got the money to go elsewhere, learn the lesson and factor that into your holiday budget next time.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 12/08/2025 12:26

Your Mum is being ridiculous! She actually thinks her desire to “wave you off” (but not have to wait around at all) trumps your kids’ safety? She’s barking. Plus she is making your journey less comfortable but unnecessarily taking up the front seat.

She does know she can’t come through customs / into the departure lounge with you, so will just be “waving you off” at the luggage drop - or bizarrely watching you queue for customs?

Can you get public transport/ drive and pay for parking instead? I just wouldn’t entertain this sort of fuckwittery, but if your Dad is going to pander to your Mum then you can’t accept his lift.

Wave you off indeed, hasn’t she got anything better to do?

Edited the fact I clearly can’t spell!

Pinkcherry26 · 12/08/2025 12:26

Is it normal in your family to literally wave people off at the airport? That's quite unusual for most people I would suggest. DF dropping you all off, with car seats, without her, sounds perfectly fine and there's no need for her to be there at all. Taxis don't have massive forcefields around them meaning car seats magically aren't needed because they are somehow safer, so why does she think her wants trump everyone else's convenience and her grandchildrens' safety?

Nomorenonsense2025 · 12/08/2025 12:26

Is she always a careless, bullying c**t who takes unnecessary risks with your kids' lives for no reason? I hope she's never left in charge of them.

Doppe · 12/08/2025 12:26

Yeah... car seats aren't just an accessory - they're to help protect a child if the vehicle they're in has an accident! Your childs safety comes before your incredibly selfish, stupid mother's wants.

FreezeDriedStrawberries · 12/08/2025 12:25

shellyleppard · 12/08/2025 12:21

I'd rather have my children safe than someone wave them off at the airport. If she's that desperate could your df make two trips?? Or she just waves them off at the house??

She can't be that desperate though, otherwise she'd "sit in Greggs for an hour."
She's being difficult, and no OP YANBU.

shellyleppard · 12/08/2025 12:25

She can wave them off at home. Not safe to travel without car seats

sunshine244 · 12/08/2025 12:24

While I dont think you're being unreasonable... what would you do if you had to book a taxi for a similar journey? Would you refuse it unless car seats were provided (some companies do).

HermioneWeasley · 12/08/2025 12:24

She is being ridiculous

SerendipityJane · 12/08/2025 12:23

Car seats ? It's political correctness gone mad, I tell you.

toomuchfaff · 12/08/2025 12:23

Nope. The difference between waving you at the airport and on the house street is miniscule. She is being ridiculous.

Icanttakethisanymore · 12/08/2025 12:22

can't she just wave you off at home? What an odd thing for her to make an issue out of.

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