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AIBU?

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Original poster

SIL coming on family celebration holiday without her husband. (MNHQ update at OP's request) Now everyone is chatting in their own language and excluding me.

84 replies

Timedifference · 11/08/2025 20:26

So, a few of us are going away to celebrate a big birthday.
SIL is coming without her husband cos he doesn't like flying and the birthday boy has picked an overseas destination.

We go on Thursday. I found out today she's coming.
She tends to monopolise my DH when she's with him - ive got a horrible feeling she'll be whispering in his ear most of the time. I hope im wrong.

AIBU to not look forward to this break anymore?
I don't want her to be lonely but she fusses over him like hes a child and I get shoved to one side.

OP posts:
OoooopsUpsideYourHead · 11/08/2025 20:47

You need to tell him to stop leaving you out.

I can't help feeling you've picked the wrong thread title though.

It should read more like "My DH always leaves me out when he gets together with his sister".

Givenupshopping · 11/08/2025 20:47

Tell your DH that the minute he starts conversing with his sister in their own language, you feel excluded, and it makes you unhappy, so please can he refrain from doing it. If he then goes ahead and does it anyway, you'd have every right to make a fuss.

As for his sister, just don't let her push in, if you want his attention, make sure YOU are the one who gets it, you wouldn't let another woman push in, would you, so don't let her.

Mumsworkneverdone · 11/08/2025 20:43

Have you spoken to your husband about how her actions make you feel?

CharlotteStreetW1 · 11/08/2025 20:42

Timedifference · 11/08/2025 20:39

I already feel excluded when they speak another language in front of me.

Oh I wouldn't be having that. I would just say "In English please" every time (or better still secretly learn their language yourself 🤭).

Original poster
Timedifference · 11/08/2025 20:39

I already feel excluded when they speak another language in front of me.

OP posts:
Original poster
Timedifference · 11/08/2025 20:37

DH hasn't said anything
She might want to have a relaxing time in a beach resort and sleep, read & eat, so I might be getting ahead of myself.
I hope I am

OP posts:
TwoWheelz · 11/08/2025 20:29

What does your DH say? It’s great they get on, rubbish If you’re excluded

Original poster
Timedifference · 11/08/2025 20:28

Yes, his sister.

OP posts:
Rachie1973 · 11/08/2025 20:27

Is it your DHs sister?