To feel inconvenienced by a tragic accident?

So do you think you are shitty?

Instead of feeling saddened about the loss of life I just feel inconvenienced and pissed off that the highlight of my trip has been ruined

I‘m going with yes this bit does make you a shitty person. It’s the “instead of..” It reads that you’re incapable of feeling both saddened that someone lost their life this morning and frustrated at the inconvenience it’s caused you. What’s stopping you feeling both things?

Life sometimes throws us curves balls. Yours today was missing your special trip. The person in the vehicle on the motorway today had death as their curveball. Their family will now be in absolute hell for months - that was their curveball.

I can only assume you’ve never been through the kind of loss that the relatives of the person holding up your trip today are going through. You’d be capable of a bit of empathy if you had.

btw @OnemargarIta your latest post above is pretty grim. You sound nasty. People are allowed to feel emotive if what you post triggers something awful and traumatic from their past.. maybe put a trigger warning on your title?

Someone’s suicide once caused me to have an extremely stressful 5 hour journey home in the days before gps. They closed the tunnel through the mountain that was between my home and work for many hours while they investigated. I had to find a way home that went around. Was it sad, yes. Was I frustrated, yes.

Yes, it's relatively common and causes a shed-load of disruption for people that just want to get home to their families. I don't think there are many commuters who have a lot of compassion in these circumstances, except for the poor drivers who are traumatised by what occurs. Accidents are another thing entirely, though, and I think most people feel sad for the victims and families, although the extent of the sadness depends on proximity to the situation.

You're just being human and having uncharitable thoughts at the moment.

Probably will feel differently in a few days when you've processed your disappointment.

Not always. Sometimes when you have lost someone and you have grief vultures who didn’t know the person, talking about it a lot, saying they’re devastated, it just makes you sick. They’re not devastated, they often just want the gossip and drama.

Not always. Sometimes when you have lost someone and you have grief vultures who didn’t know the person, talking about it a lot, saying they’re devastated, it just makes you sick. They’re not devastated, they often just want the gossip and drama.

I sometimes think it, but I don't say it out loud. Hope your holiday improves.

No it hasn't, and I'm sorry but so many people think this type of thing.

You have caused offence.The post you’re laughing at has been deleted.

Because that's the subject-matter of the OP's post? If you don't like the topic, scroll on.

I just don't feel that way. I know that the assigned hospital staff would have been aware of the passing of a beloved relative of mine but whether they grieved as much as I did or barely gave it a passing thought makes no difference. I don't know them, I'll never meet them, it's completely irrelevant to me.

Yes, it did/does/would have...

to know the death of your loved one / how that impacted you was given more thought/sone thought is/was thought about by others did/does bring some comfort.

im surprised you can't imagine that.

Yes, it did/does/would have...

to know the death of your loved one / how that impacted you was given more thought/sone thought is/was thought about by others did/does bring some comfort.

im surprised you can't imagine that.

I'd agree that it would be bad to name the person when posting about it or something. I don't see the big deal about doing it in general.

I've said YABU, because this is one of those things where we think it, but don't say it out loud!

Last year I went to the Silverstone Grand Prix. My train was delayed because someone had been hit on the tracks from Plymouth. My only option was to get up to Exeter. I ended up being massively delayed by 7 hours, I didn't get to my Airbnb until gone 10pm. I was due there at 3. I was gutted (and really anxious!), but I didn't say this out loud to anyone. I just had a cry in the toilet on the train when I was underway. Everyone thinks these things, I don't think it makes people shitty (I also don't believe anyone who says they don't!), but I think actually sitting, typing it out and not realising how it sounds makes you unreasonable.

That wasn't me, btw. I don't mind being called an idiot by a random poster but I do object to those with itchy reporting fingers screwing up the flow of conversation.

It’s a pretty shitty thing to post about

What that someone is whingeing, it’s pretty bad to do it on a public forum as well, they’ve been inconvenienced over their family members death.
Yes, l think that would be upsetting for the family to hear this🙄

Maybe because the poster was being goady?
No idea why MY replies were deleted.
Yes, this has provoked a strong reaction in me, I actually think the OP was wrong for even starting this thread in the first place.
It's not just about the fact it has happened to me and others reading this, its the complete lack of empathy for the family of whoever has been killed.
This thread has actually brought back some very painful memories and feelings for me, the fact that some people are even posting laughing emojis is making me even angrier.

shrugs If you're a shitty person, I guess I am, too. I'd probably think, 'Oh no, that poor person and their family', but it would just be a fleeting realisation of the fragility of life. I wouldn't really feel sad about it - I don't know the person. And yes, I'd feel selfishly annoyed that my plans had to be changed.

On the other hand, if I saw the accident first-hand, I'm sure I'd feel much more affected by it. I think all of this is pretty normal?

You could have just thought it, why did you need to post it?

It wasn't even my train that got cancelled because someone was "hit by a train" but I heard that announcement so frequently I got completely desensitized to it.

Firstly, you give thanks that it wasn't you who was in the accident, as things like this can happen to any of us in an instant.

It's okay to be disappointed that you didn't get to do everything you had planned, then again, three nights in Rome was never going to be enough.

Then, you resolve to save even harder, so you can come back, preferably for two weeks next time.

Finally, you also spare a thought for the family of the person killed. You've been mildly inconvenienced, but they're the ones really suffering.