Train etiquette

In my extensive experience of using public transport including main line trains, I am not surprised by your experiences OP.
I have witnessed passengers with walking aids/ with young babies and children who are not offered a seat!
Truly unbelievable.

I know. It doesn’t fit. We are saying the argument that children don’t pay for their fares is a poor one.

Are there no priority seats on your line? Some have priority seats which include priority for parent and babe in arms, which your child is. Near the doors and just ask someone to let you sit there.

I think you are confusing ‘psychic’ and ‘observant’.

I don't understand how you got yourself in that situation OP...

There were two of you.

All you needed to do is:

• you get on the train holding your child and try to get a seat for yourself and your husband
• while you husband gets on with the folded buggy and places it in a safe space and joins you. There are spaces to leave luggages on these trains (that's the line I use to travel to travel to London and back) or you can place things in the overhead space.

No drama needed.

Of course people will get annoyed if you are blocking the way and taking a long time to sort yourself out or if your child is really noisy during the journey.

Also you are not disabled, you are a parent...You can't expect people to automatically give you their seat.

For me the journey to London is 1.30 hour. I am 54 and the seats are expensive on this line. So I am afraid I would not get up for you and your kid.

I don’t think you’re entitled, I just think you’re part of the very problem you’re complaining about. And your inconvenience could have been reduced, had you been in possession of more common sense. With that in mind, I’m not convinced that you’re capable of successfully getting on your soapbox.

Why are so many people defending their right to behave in such a horrible way? And why is queuing such a ridiculous idea? We queue for everything else don't we? And we don't walk down a busy street randomly pushing people out of the way.

And I do think that people with babies and toddlers should get special treatment because it's such hard work. But then, I think everyone should be respected. If you can't give up your seat because you have a hidden disability, then you should just politely say that you're sorry but need to sit. If people were kinder the whole experience would be nicer for everyone, including the awful people on this thread. I know that's not going to happen but there's nothing wrong with saying that it should happen.

Train etiquette: position yourself on the platform where you hope a door will be. As the train comes try and move toward a door. Don't barge people out of the way. Don't need to be overly polite; saying "no no after you". No one will know who got to the platform first. Once on the train move quickly to an available seat. If you have a pram collapse it. Try not to travel on public transport with a massive pram or one you can't collapse. Bike owners are a law unto themselves but I've never been bothered by one. Toddlers welcome but not if they are screaming or banging. Parents to control their dc at all times. This is just life.

Exactly. OP is making passive aggressive comments such as becoming psychic. When in reality she said the platform was packed and many people didn’t even manage to get on the train and were left on the platform. You don’t need a crystal ball to realise it was a busy time to travel.

Judging by the sarcastic tone in which you have responded to many I would say people were tutting and giving looks more in the manner you spoke out. Did you faff and just assume someone would give up a seat for you? If there were 2 of u DH should have buggy folded ready to board and you walk on you didn't need your psychic skills to see the platform was busy travelling from a seaside town and during the school holidays unfortunately with no reservation there doesn't seem to be much train etiquette these days

You are eligible for Passenger Assistance. You can book it in advance, if you nominate a particular train. Or you can request it on arriving a bit early. It can be a game-changer when it works well. Many staff put a lot of effort into coordinating and making it work.
[edit even a local station will offer the minimum - ramp, told where to stand, guard looking out for you etc]

Are you also going to work on making sure your husband is a willing participant. You still haven’t answered why he didn’t hold the child for the journey, or why you didn’t tag team between you. You expected a complete stranger to show you more courtesy than your husband did.

You don’t need to be psychic. You just need not to be oblivious. You said the platform was mobbed. You would also have seen the approaching train was full of people. There would have been clues all around you.

Every time I’ve gotten on a train it has been a little pushy. But (and it’s usually with my dog in tow) generally most folk are polite especially if you mumble a few ‘excuse me please’ at them.

The bus is a different matter - every night people who’ve been way behind in the queue will literally shove me out of the way. So I now just use my elbows and heels to show I was in front in the queue. But if I see a buggy or an elderly person or someone on crutches I will try and help them get on first.

OP asks question, doesn't get the 100% response she wants. Takes massive offence at random strangers ....

It isn't OK, never has been, never will be, to push someone out of the way while boarding a train. But I'm another who questions if your buggy was folded as the doors opened and you found your way blocked with the guy with bicycles. You say you had to hold your child, you had to fold the buggy. You knew the train would be busy so you got there early. You say there were people on the platform that were not able to get on the train. That's going to mean that people are irritable and ratty - might not have been directed at you, but at the situation they found themselves in. Public transport, you have to take what you gets.

So people weren’t annoyed with you, they just decided to push past, give you dirty looks, and tut because….I dunno, it was a Saturday?

The pushing to get on the train was unacceptable, but so is expecting someone to give up their seat for you. You chose to have a child, and you chose to take the train, so you need to take responsibility for yourself instead of expecting strangers to sacrifice for you.

There you go then. That’s the missing train etiquette that you were looking for.

Fold the buggy before you try to board a packed train which is standing room only.