To be so sick of being broke?

OP not sure why you’re getting such horrible responses. You’re not the only one feeling the bite at the moment. As pps have said when is your debt payments ending? This will help as they’re some of your biggest payments. Hope you get through it x

edited to say also you do need some money for fun otherwise what’s the point in it all. So everyone berating you for Netflix. It is ok to want to spend a bit of cash on something you and your family enjoy. As long as not going mad. Which you aren’t

Because you said it, She “feels” that she can’t change certain things to improve her financial situation when in actual fact there are lots of things ( other people have listed on here) that she can change to improve it, yet she ignores it for various reasons. OP is not looking for solutions, she’s looking for a moan whilst throwing silly sarcastic comments at anyone attempting to help her save money.

Agree with this- if you work 40 hours a week you should be able to pay £20.00 a month for netflix- it's ridiculous the amount of people judging her for this!

And people telling her husband to look for a new job, yes he probably could by why shouldn't a milkman be able to afford to live comfortably.

well yes, because you'd be able to afford it. Absolutely bat shit to sign up for that if it leaves you with 50 quid cash for the month.

Even with your Netflix and VPN (I don't think any of my friend group have that either) thats still almost another 50 quid on subscriptions.
You complain you're broke, but there's a decent whack of spending that is choice, and that plenty of people do without. Which is fine if that is what you want to spend your money on, just don't complain then that you don't have any!

It's the debt which is killing you (as I'm sure you know).

We have similar income but no debt and it is manageable but I wouldn't like to find another £600 every month.

Do you have the finish dates for each? If you can chip off one or renegotiate any of the payments it would give you more breathing space.

You have had shitty comments but the look after the pennies advice is sound. It's fine to say WLI, gym and subscriptions are a priority for your family. E all need something.

But then you do need to look at what you can shave to cover them. Feeding four adults (one with an intolerance) is expensive but if you could get £50 a month off it would make as difference. I've seen people extend the food shop by a day each week (so every 8 days rather than 7) for example. Make use of leftovers (I got my husband an electric lunchbox which heats on a 12v in van). It is a good incentive to eat smaller portions when you can stretch stew, cottage pie, etc to a lunch sized portion.
Reduce the phones when you can get out of the contracts. £10 here and there is money to chuck at debt to free you from the cycle.

When it comes to jobs, really focus on your transferrable skills. I'd make a spreadsheet with a few columns if you are applying across sectors so retail, manufacturing etc so you have it ready for each application and can tailor appropriately.
Don't forget that if it's manufacturing for example things like understanding health and safety protocols, used to working in cold, monitoring/equipment checks, spills kit training etc are all appropriate (and good if you have less in the way of formal qualifications).

Sorry if I've made an assumption here but my husband has very little in way of educational qualifications and things like the Indeed standard CV format puts these first which is useless.

If that's the case a skills based CV is good. Lead with a relevant descriptor e.g experienced fork lift truck driver with 20 years in manufacturing and then give licence categories, health and safety training etc.

I sift CVs and I see a depressing number where people must have the experience based on their job titles but as they haven't told me this anywhere - and other candidates have - it has to be a no for interview. This is worse in lower paid jobs in some ways where more candidates meet the requirements and you can't possibly interview 100 so you have to reduce the numbers.

But you’re not broke.
you have chosen to spend money every month on what are not necessities and are in some cases luxuries. The sense of entitlement around being able to afford such items is astonishing.
gym- luxury
weight loss drugs not prescribed- luxury
having a pet- lifestyle choice that must be considered if affordable
expensive phones -luxury
multiple tv subscriptions- frivolous at best
expensive food choices- luxury/choice
supporting two additional adults- choice.

all of the above mean you have no money left. But if you cannot see that with all these choices you are living a very enjoyable, not ordinary or scrimping/poor lifestyle then you have a real problem.

I know you don't want help, but look up Dave Ramsay and the baby steps. It might just help you free up cash and get ahead x

There are free VPNs.
You don't need to pay £132 per year for that.
Phone contracts - keep your phone once your contract is over and get a sim only deal...these can be very cheap.
Tbh the issue is your debt and your disinterest in tackling that.
CAP.org and stepchange are good people to talk to.
Lots of people use the Dave Ramsey method to get out of debt.
Good luck.

I don't know how you manage to do anything with that big fucking chip on your shoulder OP

YANBU to be sick of being broke.
YABU to not be able to acknowledge that you are broke because of choices you've made and continue to make

Same as most of us. Where we are is down to the choices we make and the paths we take 🤷‍♀️

Are your kids contributing at all,m My dad wouldn't expect anything if we didn't work but if we had an income he would charge us housekeeping, he wouldn't ask for any more than we could afford but it helped towards the running costs of the house.
Try to get a cheaper phone contract, j just changed mine from £16pm to £8pm. How on earth are you spending £850 pm on groceries, that's over £100 a week, how big is your family? My husband usedctompkay a ganeveith me while teaching me to biget he eoukd naneca meal and send me intonthr shoo to buy the items for this meal as cheaply as possible, I had to think about what we already had at home, how I could buy something for a little less, e.g. short dated reduced stock, loose rather than packaged veg, cheaper cuts of meat etc. Gym membership is a luxury not an essential, buy yourself a cheap yoga mat and exercise at home to youtube videos. Look at comparison sites for cheaper Internet I'm sure you can find a cheaper provider that is still fast enough for what you need.

I think your main struggle relates to your debt. I’d want those bailiffs off my back asap. Can you sell anything on Vinted to generate some extra cash to pay off this debt? Even putting things on for >£5 can be worth it as it all adds up.

Definitely contact your utility companies to enquire about support towards payments for lower income families. I know my water company helps people on NMW a lot.

Also, try to get your food bill down even slightly. Could all the family be on board with this challenge? What swaps could we make? Research cheap but tasty meals and take turns to cook them. At least whilst you’re making debt repayments but by then your spending habits may have changed and you can begin to build sinking funds.

I can understand why you are keeping your WLI and tv packages for what it’s worth. Get the whole family on board and see if you can get that debt cleared so the money can be put towards treats for everyone.

Minimum wage jobs and ridiculous expenses=broke. Don’t understand the post.

Have you had help from CAB or a debt advice charity regards the utility and other debt? Or have you just been dealing with your creditors direct? If it's the latter then now might be the time to get help from an advisor. Not only will they be able to negotiate on your behalf, they may be able to obtain grants and do a benefits check.

Yep.

I lost my job as soon as it became apparent my son would need extra care, constant appointments etc.

Suggest you do the 'Rebel Finance' course on YouTube if you get time. Really useful help about personal finances & it's free...

I do think that:

a) you need a plan for life after the mounjaro - you don't want to be paying for it forever, even now you are on a very cheap deal, staying on it to maintain is just going to be too expensive.
b) ask your DDs to contribute just a bit to the food shop. £20 a week or something - you are spending quite a lot, its actually good for them to learn how much things cost.
c) on the debt is your credit rating fucked? Are you paying a lot of interest or could there be a way to get a lower interest loan or credit card with zero interest period, pay the debt then your repayments will go further as all going on capital

So obviously a big issue is the debt repayments. Have you got an estimate of when you'll be finished paying? Sometimes it helps to know its 3 yrs or whatever then everything will get better.

If you could clear the debt you could have hundreds more a month. Have you got anything at all you could sell to pay a bit extra off & get free of it?

There's a huge demand for childcare at the moment. Have you considered doing an evening qualification to become a childminder working out of your own home? Offering wraparound care before and after school can be really lucrative, you could have (for example) 6 kids paying £25 a day, thats £150 a day. Even knocking off £30 for costs like food, insurance etc, you could make more working fewer hours - £120 a day is £600 a week.

You could also fit in some cleaning work during the school day and make more money that way - where i live cleaners are on £17-20 an hour, even in cheaper areas its £15.

Forgot to say our GP surgery for weight less drug is practically impossible. BMI over 40 and 4 other conditions as well!
Definitely try and speak to Stepchange because it’s the debit repaying that what is dragging you down.
I also don’t blame you for the little luxuries it’s soul destroying otherwise.

I’m sorry that you’ve experienced that, if they have eligible needs - they are entitled to support. They only need to meet two of the criteria under the care act -

     Managing toilet needs. 

• Being appropriately clothed.

• Making use of the adult's home safely.

• Maintaining a habitable home environment.

• Developing and maintaining personal relationships.

• Accessing and engaging in work, training, education or volunteering.

• Making use of local facilities and services.

Obviously if the only support they need is around cleaning or shopping the LA won’t provide that but if they need that level of support that you cannot work then they must be eligible so I’d suggest that you ask for a reassessment and keep raising complaints until you get to the ombudsman.

You could also request that your mums GP do a continuing healthcare checklist for her - as her needs sound like they’re more health related. If she triggers then she may be able to access support through the NHS.

I see why it doesn’t feel like a choice, I personally couldn’t give up work to support my family member, when they were dying of cancer and needed round the clock care, she wouldn’t accept support off anyone other than me and my OH, so we had to move in with her but we both had to do her care around work as we just wouldn’t be able to give up work, it was never an option for us, but I can see there’s a difference as there was an end in sight for us as she was terminal.

I hope you are able to get your parents the support they should be entitled to

I definitely think it would be a good idea to take advice your debt situation from one of the charities recommended by Money Saving Expert if you haven’t already OP.

Sorry, I know you are probably all ‘adviced out’ by now

As a follow up OP, did a quick AI-play around what you need annual salary-wise to be comfortable (all basic needs and a few minimal luxuries) in the UK. It spat out that in 2019 this figure was circa £56k and in 2025 it has risen to £88k. For comparison, a family with two FT minimum wages jobs earns circa £48k.

This was based on the Minimum Income Standard research led by the Joseph Rowntree Foundation and Loughborough University, which is updated regularly by calculating the real-world costs of housing, bills, food, clothing, childcare, transport, and other essentials at the time.

You have every right to want a moan about this. It’s tough out there for so so many people.

Hi Op. this sounds like a really challenging situation, and you are doing well supporting your family. i’ve recently been in this situation. i’ve got savvy shopping on ‘yellow labels’ and making dinner with whatever is reduced. and i try and bulk buy things of amazon because it’s often cheaper - like toilet roll, shampoo, deodorant etc. also, when your DC starts uni they could get a student card, which could make netflix and amazon cheaper maybe. you are doing a good job paying off debts. keep going, you will get there. sending you a hug x

Moan away @PrincessC0nsuelaBananaHammock, it’s really disheartening to have two adults in full time work and still be struggling. I won’t be offering you any ‘advice’!

Sounds like you’ve done an amazing job with your kids inspite of the tough times you’ve had…and hoping their education helps spring board them into the jobs they want.