To be so sick of being broke?

Why 'should' people be able to have luxuries or 'extras' if they can't afford them? Yes, it's unfair. But if you have the luxuries, there's no point in moaning that you can't afford the basics. 'Extras' are what you buy to treat yourself after you've taken care of the basic essentials .

You can lose weight for free. Yes it’s a lot easier with WLI so they are a luxury. I’m dieting and it would be a lot easier if I didn’t feel hungry. So that’s a luxury to me.

You are getting such a hard time on this thread. Yes, you have a few extras, but why shouldn’t you ? You are working FT and these little luxuries help get you to the end of the week and the beginning of the next.

The bigger picture is that you shouldn’t feel more comfortable on benefits than working, you should be rewarded for working and contributing to the economy. It is unfair that you are in this position.

You keep making comments like this, as if you don't actually understand that you are buying luxuries. You don't perceive them as luxuries but they are.

When you're paying off hundreds of pounds of debt a month other people wouldn't be spending hundreds of pounds on food, TV, the gym and MJ.

As others have said, it's just a brand name and it's (by law) exactly the same as the generic versions. You're just paying for advertising and fancier packaging. You can buy Imodium for a few quid or you can get exactly the same stuff (I think it's loperamide?) for about 59p. But although you've said it's not the point of the thread, it could be one important part of it. Budgeting includes looking closely at what you're buying and seeing if it's necessary.

I read posts like the OP's and it makes me so angry. I saw all those images of the Jeff Bezos wedding and just can't imagine their wealth. I saw that one of the Kardashians had taken a private jet for a 5 min journey. These people are just burning up resources and money while others struggle. The super rich are getting richer, the poor are getting poorer.
I'm sorry, I've nothing to say, but it's just so wrong, all the over consumption and greed while others struggle. Commiserations OP. I hope it gets better soon..

All weight loss jabs are prescribed. They are a prescription medication. If you mean OP is not getting them on the NHS, well hardly anyone is. She had a BMI of over 35, the WLI are a massive benefit to her health. They are not a luxury.

Posting in AIBU if you want a moan isn’t the right place. People are going to comment as you’re spending a lot of money on unnecessary stuff and complaining you’re broke. Your young adults might be on £12 an hour, but probably have a lot of disposable cash as they are living at home for free. I agree in charging them a small amount towards food. That will help. Over £200 a week on food / toiletries is a lot, and you can definitely make savings there, especially as one person is on WLI. But clearly you don’t want advice, despite posting in a group asking if you’re being unreasonable. So crack on. In a couple of years you’ll be debt free.

Without knowing the ins & outs of DH contract, my immediate concern in whether his company are complying with paying NMW. I can’t make the numbers stack up without coming to the conclusion they’re shorting his wages. I’m assuming he’s salaried? Are his pension contributions salary sacrifice? (Many are - they payslip will show this).

So according to your finances you should have £300 spare?
You could cancel subscriptions and have freeview
Dont take out new phone contacts when they runout, go sim free.
your dh could buy some second hand weights and workout at home or go running.
Ask your kids to contribute £100 a month each at least until the debt is cleared.
Your food bill is high, we are 4 adults and 1 child, (2 autistic and 1 adhd) we spend around £700 per month on food/toiletries /cleaning. Also use tesco. We only eat meat 3x a week and found that saved a lot.

Op I’m really sorry that things are tough financially. Some - many - of the responses on this thread are completely out of order.

I hope that things improve for you and absolutely hear what you are saying - life is a bloody grind these days. Well done on supporting your children and on your weight loss. You sound amazing actually. Onwards, my friend 💪🏼💪🏼

PAYG is expensive. Change to a sim only deal.

Once the Pip comes through they can cover their own food costs plus their own expenses. This will help no end.

In addition can the other youngster up her hours at all or wd it compromise her academic grades?

Can you reduce or cancel any direct debits? Change your supermarket of choice? Buy own brand items only? Shop in the reduced aisles regularly? Buy yellow sticker foods?

Yes, certainly things are expensive but - trying to say this as gently as possible - since you're fully adult, why haven't you been able to earn more than minimum wage by now?

Second or weekend job, maybe a cafe/shop/pub both you and dh should do and your kids are grown so can be left alone

I can't even get an appointment with my GP! I have get my HRT from Boots because my GP won't even entertain seeing me for menopause!

I know this isn't an advice thread, but all the same ... 😉 I've been paying for mine (from Oxford Online Pharmacy, cheaper than Boots) for two years. Spoke to my GP on the phone last week. He said "We're more relaxed about HRT now" and put it on prescription. Worth another go, perhaps?

It is but she just wants to feel sorry for herself, have a rant and be rude to others on here who offer help. No wonder she's in the situation she's in - in debt yet has weight loss injections, won't think about children paying towards own food or phones (even a token amount), has a gym membership, has Amazon prime, Disney, netflix and a VPN and pays a stupid amount on food - but poor her let her rant about being skint.

Yeah she's allowed to have a moan but at the same time people are allowed to comment on her being ridiculous to not think actually she has a decent household income to be getting on more comfortably.

Id be embarrassed to post this and then to say I'm wasting money on these areas.

Flipping hell at least have one subscription at a time. Have Netflix, take a break and then pay for Disney or prime. You not asking your kids to chip in, even if just £10 for their PAYG Phones could set them up to be like you, not financially aware and being in debt and still not prioritising spending. Hopefully they don't get into that situation and also become angry/rude.

I know it seems like a long time at the moment, but the next eighteen months will whizz by. Who knows - you might both be in better jobs in six months and can over pay a bit more and that might mean that the debt is nearly gone in just over a year….. it could happen.

It Feels like an uphill struggle because it is and you’re at the part where there seems to be no end - but it’s not too far away.

And keep the tv subscriptions and gym membership etc because if you strip away all the extras you’d be utterly miserable, and that’s when things get even worse (because at some point you’d pop and potentially spend what you don’t have having a blow out to improve your mood which is short lived - been there and done that myself in the past). So those little extras can just keep you going.

You’re nearly there.

Yes exactly but op says she does not get PIP and has not been through the work capability process so I'm a bit baffled how she gets UC but I imagine it will stop when she starts college.

Don’t know why you’re getting such a hard time from some posters op. The cost of living is higher than it’s been in decades and wages have largely stagnated. Two people working full time should be entitled to some fuckin small luxuries in life! Since when does having a paid-for TV package, a pet and a pass to go swimming become a luxury. What have we become in the UK?! it’s not a race to the bottom where we all live ultra frugal lives with nothing but the very basics of food, water, heating and shelter. We are the 6TH largest economy in the world yet we have far too many people living in poverty or just scraping by and barely getting to pay day. Yes maybe op could cut back on her swimming or give up her dog or kick her kids out (joking on that one obviously) but what a sad sad reality that would be in our mega rich country.

I'm sorry.
It's shit.

I think you're doing quite well, but I understand your frustration.
Of course you're not going to take money from your kids at this point as you don't want them to feel like you do.
If it helps, these were the worst years for me too. Mine are 24 and 21 now, both suddenly work full time at just above nmw in jobs with a clear progression, so your sacrifices will be worth it.

I don't think there's much more you can do currently. Keep on with the pip for your daughter. Google 'local support worker charity' and see if you can get her one for free for a few months. This will be invaluable in helping her access what she's entitled to and helping with the paperwork.

Always pay council tax first. They escalate quickly. But obviously you know this now!

It might be worth emailing your housing officer and explaining your situation. They may have suggestions. This is obviously dependent on how decent they are! But even if you get no response, it's good to have done this now if things become even more tight in the future. They're likely to be more sympathetic if youve told them in advance about budgeting issues.

The only thing you can really save on is food, I'm happy to give you suggestions if you want them, but I'm reluctant to push that if you're happy with it currently. (This was my work voice, I'm a benefits advisor!)

And I understand about the benadryl. It's the only name brand medication I use too!

You raised two amazing kids. You are doing bloody well. You've managed to lose weight while navigating everything life has thrown at you. You are nearly there.

Sometimes we just need a bitching moan, because it feels completely neverending. Let it out on Mumsnet. I do!

The banding was done decades ago which is why it seems so random now though basically the lower the value of the house the lower the council tax band is with A being the lowest. I'm in a Band A in a shit area in a fairly deprived city and pay £133 and that is with the single person 25% discount . Second-highest rate of council tax in the country and the council is technically bankrupt too so fun times all round. Don't blame you for having a moan, I was trawling though my bank statements looking for something I paid for ages ago and was shocked at the difference between my outgoings four years ago and now. Gas and Elec up 61%, water up 59%, council tax up 20%. Couldn't face looking at my old food shopping amounts. It is horrible being skint

But it’s all relative isn’t it. Maybe I’m considering poor to be people who have no income, can’t afford to buy cheap food, can’t clothe themselves, can’t house themselves. Your life in comparison seems pretty comfortable.