To be so sick of being broke?

OP to me the £850 per month on food and household essentials seems really high. We are a family of 5 and I set food budget at £110 per week. I will occasionally visit Costco and bulk buy but I don't have pets so I'm not sure if how much of that is for your pets. Maybe spend a month with a daily spend diary and review to see if you can identify any obvious areas for cutback. Good luck, everything is so expensive at the moment

Does your eldest pay anything towards food OP? I think they should in your case. You sound like things are very tight.

But what has he done to progress? Applied for promotions? Upskilled? Gained qualifications?

Moan away OP, the CoL is bonkers and you work long hours..

Although £850 a month on groceries and pet food is pretty generous - I know because I spend that much and shop at Ocado and Waitrose (family of 4) and whilst I don’t go mad, I am not scrimping either. My shops also include toiletries / household stuff etc, although I don’t have pets as I don’t want the additional responsibility or effort😅

Anyway, the groceries bill seems like the only potential moveable cost, but that’s only possible if you batch cook / meal plan, blah blah..

we have Netflix only. no Amazon, no TV licence (i.e. no live TV at all), no Disney etc. I don't see the issue with only having Netflix. you clearly haven't got the priorities right if you can't afford to live and prioritize weight loss drugs and Amazon over affording in essentials

Moan away OP, but MN can be quite quick to jump on partly self-inflicted moaning. Do what you choose with your money, but I would still try to reduce food a bit and/or get a contribution from adult kids, as those are doable without too much sacrifice. There's also the cheaper Netflix, with ads, which is actually OK.

Just RTFT. Here’s a breakdown on your outgoings:

Rent - £600 - Probably as cheap as you can get unless you’re living in a house much bigger than you need. Also much cheaper than the majority of mortgages.

Gas/Electric - £450 (paying off debt) - Continue to pay this down then look to switch to a cheaper energy supplier.
Water - £100 (paying off debt) - Not much you can do.
Council Tax - £165 - Check your house is in the correct band, read MSE for this.
Council Tax debt - £230 (paying off bailiffs) - Not much you can do.
Mobiles - £100 (2 on contract, paying off devices, 2 PAYG) - Don’t upgrade at the end of contracts, buy outright, if you can’t afford the latest model, you don’t get it.
Car Insurance - £45 - Decent price.
Diesel/car maintenance - £100 (DH needs the car to get to work as does permanent nights) - Avoid using the car unless essential, drive as efficiently as you can to save diesel, no heavy acceleration or breaking, drive the car in eco mode if it has one.
Internet - £65 (need top speed as WFH FT). - See if you can find a cheaper one.
Subscriptions/VPN - £66 - Cut these down, that’s a lot of money going out for someone who is in debt and struggling financially.
Gym - £25 - See if there is a cheaper gym in your area and if so, switch.
Mounjaro - £99 - Not an essential, cut it out whilst you pay down your debt and get a better paid job, continue to eat healthily and exercise more.
Debt - £112 - Continue paying this down, with the most expensive debt taking priority (Highest interest rate).

Groceries (including toiletries etc) - £850 (ish). - This is a ridiculous amount for 4 adults. Have a look at meal planning and cut it down. Also look into intermittent fasting, you’ll eat less, lose weight and be generally healthier.

I usually have sympathy for people who say they're broke but you lost my sympathy when you said weight loss injections, Prime and Netflix were no negotiable. May be less binging on crap American tv and get off your arse you may not need weight loss injections.

You're in debt. They should be the first things to go. Seriously have a word with yourself.

P.S I work from home full time and don't need a vpn.

Sorry things are tough, I hope the PIP application is successful this time.

My gas and electric bills are horrific, no debt just high usage. But it transpires a faulty fridge freezer was costing us about £200! Of course having the money to replace items is another problem when things are already really tight.

As you're locked into contracts there's not much you can do about that. I signed up to do telephone surveys and I've made a whacking £10 in the last month😅 but it might be worth you all looking into something like that? Appreciate it feels a bit pointless, but when there's nothing to cut back on it would at least pay for the Benadryl.

If you have a child so disabled that they need a SAHM then you've got a responsibility to earn a bit more to support them.

If you can't afford allergy medication, you don’t Netflix ot Amazon or a VPN. Surely that's not hard to work out.

Once the shitload of debt is paid off, reconsider.

Some people are too busy working and surviving. Also, milkmen are actually contributing to a community, perhaps he enjoys it?

@PrincessC0nsuelaBananaHammock I buy 360 cetitirizine tablets on amazon for £12.

Why had your husband not bothered to improve his career over the years? I get that yours has been restricted by caring.

Where is most of the money going, your rent/mortgage?

Yes you won’t be eligible for UC, and why should you be? All you can do is continue applying for better paid jobs and trying to cut expenses where you can. For example, Benadryl is just diphenhydramine; you can buy a cheaper variant in the pharmacy or the supermarket.

Is there any way you could cut your food expenses for a few months, just so you can get a few pennies behind you? Any naughty treats that could go, just for a little while? I know that'd be hard. If you reduced it by even £100 or £50?

The weekly shop cost is increasing every week😤. I see people with their trollies piled high and I really feel for them when the cashier says £150, £200, etc😩

£850 on groceries? WTF?!?!?!

and Mounjaro is not essential - it really isn’t. You say you don’t want a heart attack - if you were that unhealthy you’d have it on nhs prescrpition

gym membership? What’s wrong with walking or running?

i pay half what you do for broadband plus it includes tv and netflix

You should live within your means with zero extra until debts are paid. No Amazon No Netflix No Gym No WLD. Nothing zilch for 10-12 months whatever till debts paid THEN reassess.
For most, who are interested in a balanced budget, the sacrifice and resulting peace is worthwhile.
But your defensive tone says it all.
Question without WLD did you equally feel you “deserved” the extra foods you consumed? or are your weight issues and high food cost issues linked to poor cooking skills?

You probably need to consider ways to reduce the food budget - that's a lot for 4, especially on a limited budget.
Maybe post a shopping list/meal plan?
Do you eat a lot of meat? Chocolate? Brands?

Loads of people live like this..
You need to focus on whatever you have got.
Somebody out will be jealous of you and will have less than you.

@PrincessC0nsuelaBananaHammock . I completely understand the joyless existence of having to cut back to the bone but like you we ( many years ago) acquired debt, due to unexpected circumstances rather than splurging, and at the time our joint income, like yours were very modest .
We had to consider , regardless of what we wanted , or felt we deserved, what we could actually afford and had to cut out everything that wasn't essential unless debt was repaid .
The quicker you can clear the debt the quicker a great weight will be lifted from your shoulders .

I think you said you just wanted a moan and that's fair enough-we all need to be able to moan from time to time!

But although you don't seem to believe it possible, I work in this field and think you could get more disposable income by getting decent debt advice and checking all outgoings - can you make them cheaper?. It's worth a shot, isn't it?

Eg Could the food budget be reduced with meal planning, cutting down meat, cheap meals, eating from the freezer etc etc