social media is convincing all our kids they are nd?

And just being utterly fucking exhausted all the time because you are completely overwhelmed all of the time with trying to juggle everything without a brain that naturally prioritises so your brain is constantly holding everything in the same place and a brain that can’t filter so everything around you, every lane, sign, car on the road, bird, pedestrian, dog whether in your line of travel is being focussed on. All the time.

and then trying not to snap at people and trying to look normal because you are one step away from having a meltdown in the supermarket.

It’s because perimenopause causes changes that cause us to be less able to apply the strategies and coping mechanisms we have used all our lives.

it’s not some theory. It’s a fact.

Exactly - of course it exists! But too many people have absolutely no idea about the realities of ADHD and autism and just like to spout a load of nonsense.

100% @tumblingdowntherabbithole

And to the posters questioning the idea ADHD masking exists - the clue is in the name.

There is one theory that ADHD was an evolved biological advantage in hunter gatherer societies.

https://www.theguardian.com/science/2024/feb/21/adhd-may-have-been-an-evolutionary-advantage-research-suggests

If this is the case it would make sense that a huge number of people have it. Life has simply moved in a direction where many of the traits which were advantageous previously, are hugely disadvantageous when trying to navigate modern life.

I'm wondering as per the thread title if over diagnosis is a thing re ADHD and if it seems to be a thing on social media

Social media isn't representative of real life - you also have to remember that algorithms come into play, so if you watch or interact with several videos about ADHD, you'll see more and more of them in your feed.

In real life, you can't just rock up to a clinic and get a diagnosis. You need pages and pages of evidence. Doctors reports, school reports, SENCO reports. I was diagnosed in adulthood (autism, not ADHD) and they spent several hours interviewing my parents, looking at school reports, exam results, my job history, my mental health - it's endless.

No mentally healthy, neurotypical person thinks "you know what would make my/my child's life better? A diagnosis that comes with stereotypes, criticisms, nasty comments and ignorance!".

I can't possibly answer that. I'm not commenting on individual cases. I'm not saying every diagnosis is wrong. Diagnosis is obviously very helpful and appropriate. I'm wondering as per the thread title if over diagnosis is a thing re ADHD and if it seems to be a thing on social media. It doesn't bother me as such, I think it's an interesting question and have an opinion.

What are you talking about. Young people want their diagnoses to get a life and for them to navigate life better. ADHD diagnose is enabling my children to finish their education and go to uni. It gives answers,has helped hugely with their MH and illness alongside enabled access to treatment( medication, strategies and therapy).

No everything is not fixed by medication and many don’t take it. It’s one of several tools
for some.

My DS @Bellsbeachwaves has a neurological condition diagnosed by a consultant neurologist in NHS as well as ASD and one other condition. I won't say what the neurological condition is as it's a bit outing but am curious if you think that is over pathologising?

Exactly. When you've never had to mask, you have no idea what it entails and how utterly exhausting it can be.

Above post as response to posts by

SteakBakesAndHotTakes

1diamondearing

“Buying clean socks and underwear every week because you keep forgetting to wash them on time. Same with using paper plates and cutlery.
Showing up an hour early for an appointment to make sure you get there on time, and not being able to do or think about anything else all day other than getting to that appointment.
Spending 100% of your time focused on work, and working until midnight every night, to make sure you don't make any mistakes or get everything done, because you can't concentrate hard enough to finish it during work hours, then burning out and leaving the job six months later. Rinse and repeat.
HTH.”

all of this and for me add:

Drinking too much on social occasions since teenage years to try to quell brain wildfire and appear ‘normal’.

5 paid for todo/diarising/notetaking apps costing almost £1k a year. All essential to to sustain my career.

internally repeating/revoicing what someone is saying to me in real time, trying to take-in and remember what they are saying

stimming in socially acceptable ways - big gesticulations, lots of movement even when standing ‘still’, breaking so many pens through fidgeting in meetings.

sleeping every single night with a podcast.

internally counting steps when walking anywhere as can’t handle the boredom of simple walking

Hiding anxiety is easy to do if you’ve been doing it since you were a child.

Lists of things to do, including ‘get dressed’, ‘brush teeth’, ‘go to toilet’, ‘have breakfast’ required just to get out of house.

As a child masking obsessive behaviour - eg pretending to ‘play hide and seek with no one’ whilst actually checking behind all the furniture and doors.

Buying repeats of the same clothes to stop decision paralysis.

there are so many more.

Weighted blankets. Hot water bottles in bed even in heatwaves.

The fact that some people are denying that ADHD masking could be real really exposes how the other half live 😢

@Bellsbeachwaves yeah, but why does that bother you?

Because diagnosis itself is rooted in a model/paradigm/philosophy that is a) medical and b) positivist - that reality is objective and can be quantified through science and observation. This poses problems when applied to something as complex as human experience. It fixes a cluster of difficulties into something treatable through medicine and explains away something infinitely more diverse in its nature into one concrete label. It reifies a condition as essentially biological rather than taking into account the psychosocial experience of a person. Placing human behaviour and experience into this concrete box is limiting, and leaves less room for change and development, and also perpetuates a worrying trend of medicating subjective experience, which, to take it back to the topic of this thread, is an understandable concern for children in particular. Pathologising the child means nothing in society, family, relationships and so on has to change and everything can be fixed through taking medication, which is expensive but also comes with risks.

No but if they see TikTok telling them because they can’t be bothered to do any laundry that indicates they are ADHD - official diagnosis or not - the power of persuasion - oh it’s not you you don’t have to change it’s modern society your brain is different so other people have to understand that otherwise they are horrible ableist people

humans are lazy - they don’t seek out social media that says - yep life is hard and boring - they seek out - oh poor misunderstood you

ok so you have ADHD? Now what are you going to do? The world isn’t suddenly going to change. Do you expect other people to carry you through life and effectively become a passenger? Not going to happen it’s hard enough for youngsters right now carrying someone else is unreasonable.

That doesn't mean they will get one though .

Yes this is true
Teens call it “the isms”
“oh yes they have an ism”
and then they shrug and carry on - it has become so frequent, and impossible to accommodate that it feels like they have compassion fatigue - which I can totally understand

Social media is affecting our teens and young adults in so many ways

It’s part of parenting to guide them through this nonsense nowadays.

Diagnosis or not life isn’t suddenly going to be easy. It isn’t is it? If someone is ND an understanding of that can be beneficial. But if you aren’t ND and get persuaded you probably are it’s more of a detriment.

Some of this can come down to the “you are perfect as you are you don’t have to change or pretend” and that’s bollocks, we all have to do stuff that’s hard, boring, difficult, more so when you are a young adult.

So we have to counter this as parents and explain “suck it up buttercup you are not that special”. Like bear hunt said “you have to go through it” - yes you will have to do your own domestic chores at uni, yes you have to get to classes on time with what you need, yes you have to do the boring jobs when you start work, no no one thinks you are special, you are a bang average human out there, get on with it.

So yes social media is a poison in our society, or can be, Might be worth trying to figure out who benefits from trying to persuade large numbers of young adults they are ND, I mean if you can persuade a fair number of people they can’t cope in the big bad world, that means there is less competition out there doesn’t it.

Almost everyone i know is seeking a diagnosis. So many have it now or are self diagnosing that it is starting to not be taken seriously. I know 2 young adults who are seeking a diagnosis as they are too anxious to get a job.

I didn't say diagnoses did I?

Yes, it does minimise cases a lot of times, you get eye rolling when you state you're ND as people are used to a lot of people saying so with no basis.

That's my experience, which may not be true for you.

I suspect those that like to gatekeep aren't even the ones seeking diagnosis which makes it even weirder.

No genuine cases are not minimised by this, what minimises genuine diagnoses is ignorance and abelism and a lack of knowledge re those surrounding undiagnosed children and young adults struggling with ND.

All of which costs the country big time in harder to treat mental illness, prison overpopulation, poorer education outcomes etc

It's used by people who want to place blame on something/someone/anything to convince themselves there's a reason for their behaviour.

Genuine cases are unfortunately then minimised by this.