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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think Kate and William saw Harry and Meghan as a real threat to their image?

491 replies

BluntPinkNewt · 09/08/2025 11:32

From the moment Harry and Meghan got together, the media attention was huge. Meghan was glamorous, charismatic, and had a strong public presence - something the royal family hadn’t seen before from an outsider. For a while, it felt like they were the most exciting and modern part of the monarchy.

Kate and William have always been the “stable” and “traditional” royals but suddenly, Harry and Meghan were drawing attention in a way that might have made them seem more relatable and interesting in comparison. The shift in public perception (and maybe even palace dynamics) must have been unsettling.

Obviously things have played out the way they have but AIBU to think that, at least at the time, William and Kate felt genuinely threatened by how much attention and influence Harry and Meghan were gaining?

OP posts:
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BIossomtoes · 09/08/2025 16:13

thepariscrimefiles · 09/08/2025 16:12

I was simply responding directly to the poster who said that Meghan hadn't been involved with any philanthropic causes prior to meeting Harry. She was wrong.

And so were you when you said the Prince of Wales wasn’t involved in causes.

thepariscrimefiles · 09/08/2025 16:12

BIossomtoes · 09/08/2025 16:08

Amazing you can reel off the Duchess of Sussex’s apparent philanthropy yet can’t name a single example of the Prince of Wales’ - which is way more prolific.

I was simply responding directly to the poster who said that Meghan hadn't been involved with any philanthropic causes prior to meeting Harry. She was wrong.

IdaGlossop · 09/08/2025 16:11

BIossomtoes · 09/08/2025 16:08

Amazing you can reel off the Duchess of Sussex’s apparent philanthropy yet can’t name a single example of the Prince of Wales’ - which is way more prolific.

The post is a direct cut-and-paste from an Meghan-approved biog, IMO.

ToWhitToWhoo · 09/08/2025 16:11

Doubt it. William is heir to the throne, not a political candidate. He and Kate don't need to worry about their 'image'.

KellySeveride · 09/08/2025 16:09

PotolKimchi · 09/08/2025 15:54

What I find so amusing is that H&M have supporters, a whole Squad. Why?! They are mildly talented, hugely entitled (him), not very interesting people who haven’t done anything of note that would actually elicit global admiration. (Neither have W&K but they don’t seem to have a dedicated fan club in quite the same way).
I understand admiring sports stars- I was a Federer fan all the way. I can imagine being a fan of a huge movie star. Someone who writes best selling books. A painter or a musician of extraordinary ability.

Someone whose research has saved lives.
I am baffled by why seemingly intelligent independent women would be falling over themselves for a woman who seems to define herself by a title she got by marrying someone whose principal claim to fame is an accident of birth (aka he’s born royal).

Because I like an underdog, but mostly I fully believe that the media are trying to engineer hatred and I don’t like being told what to think!

I think W and C are boring as fuck and I think H and M have a bit of personality and a bit of spunk and I respect that even if I don’t always agree with everything they’ve said or done.

BIossomtoes · 09/08/2025 16:08

thepariscrimefiles · 09/08/2025 15:57

Meghan was defintely involved in philanthropic causes prior to meeting Harry. She volunteered in a soup kitchen on Skid Row as a teenager.

She became a counsellor for the international network One Young World in 2014, spoke at its 2014 summit in Dublin and attended the 2016 opening ceremony in Ottawa. Also in 2014, she toured Spain, Italy, Turkey, Afghanistan and England with the United Service Organizations.

In 2016, Meghan became a global ambassador for World Vision Canada, traveling to Rwanda for the Clean Water Campaign. After a trip to India focused on raising awareness for women's issues, she penned an op-ed for Time magazine concerning stigmatization of women in regard to menstrual health. She has also worked with the United Nations Entity for Gender Equality and the Empowerment of Women as an advocate.

Amazing you can reel off the Duchess of Sussex’s apparent philanthropy yet can’t name a single example of the Prince of Wales’ - which is way more prolific.

mydogisthebest · 09/08/2025 16:07

Meghan is a million times more glamourous than Kate

thepariscrimefiles · 09/08/2025 16:05

CoffeeCantata · 09/08/2025 15:30

You are showing your ignorance here. A quick google would set you right on most of your misconceptions.

I have googled and even the Tatler has an article about Princee Ann getting annoyed with the number of royal engagements that William is doing.

According to sources close to the princess, the 74-year-old would like to see Prince William ‘do more of the “bread-and-butter” royal engagements.’ For example, despite the fact that many of these Investitures take place at Windsor Castle - minutes from Prince William’s home, Adelaide Cottage - it is Anne who is still doing the lion’s share.

https://www.tatler.com/article/it-annoys-her-princess-anne-is-growing-frustrated-with-prince-william-say-insider-sources

‘It annoys her’: Princess Anne is growing frustrated with Prince William as she would ‘like him to do more bread-and-butter engagements’, say insider sources

As the Princess Royal nears her 75th Birthday, the hardest working royal is said to need help with one of her 474 engagements

https://www.tatler.com/article/it-annoys-her-princess-anne-is-growing-frustrated-with-prince-william-say-insider-sources

BunnyLake · 09/08/2025 16:05

PotolKimchi · 09/08/2025 15:54

What I find so amusing is that H&M have supporters, a whole Squad. Why?! They are mildly talented, hugely entitled (him), not very interesting people who haven’t done anything of note that would actually elicit global admiration. (Neither have W&K but they don’t seem to have a dedicated fan club in quite the same way).
I understand admiring sports stars- I was a Federer fan all the way. I can imagine being a fan of a huge movie star. Someone who writes best selling books. A painter or a musician of extraordinary ability.

Someone whose research has saved lives.
I am baffled by why seemingly intelligent independent women would be falling over themselves for a woman who seems to define herself by a title she got by marrying someone whose principal claim to fame is an accident of birth (aka he’s born royal).

Weren’t they getting paid? I seem to have read that a lot were paid for their devotion. That would make sense to me as their obsessiveness seems disproportionate to H&M’s talents, charm or charisma.

timetochange234 · 09/08/2025 16:05

Can’t stand Harry’s entitled victim stance! He’s as bad as her. At least Kate is down to earth and steering the royal family in the right direction

Boomer55 · 09/08/2025 16:05

BluntPinkNewt · 09/08/2025 11:32

From the moment Harry and Meghan got together, the media attention was huge. Meghan was glamorous, charismatic, and had a strong public presence - something the royal family hadn’t seen before from an outsider. For a while, it felt like they were the most exciting and modern part of the monarchy.

Kate and William have always been the “stable” and “traditional” royals but suddenly, Harry and Meghan were drawing attention in a way that might have made them seem more relatable and interesting in comparison. The shift in public perception (and maybe even palace dynamics) must have been unsettling.

Obviously things have played out the way they have but AIBU to think that, at least at the time, William and Kate felt genuinely threatened by how much attention and influence Harry and Meghan were gaining?

Yeah, Kate makes sure the news is slanted their way with sycophantic reporters.🙄

PotolKimchi · 09/08/2025 16:03

Come on- volunteered in a soup kitchen as a teenager is not something we need to fall over someone for? I have volunteered with charities all my life. DH has mentored since he was in his 20s. We give to some charities (once we had stable incomes). We are very ordinary people. I am not demanding that I have a fan club. I wouldn’t say no to one…

Compared to their global contribution both the hate and the adulation H&M receive is disproportionate.

Ok, let’s say you hate the monarchy. I am no fan. But why latch on to H&M? They clearly want their own piece of the royal pie, have flopped outside the royal fold unless they were dishing royal dirt and most importantly, are not worth fawning over.
They absolutely do not want to bring the monarchy down. They are just pissed they didn’t the share they thought they deserved.

DeLaRuiz · 09/08/2025 15:58

Horserider5678 · 09/08/2025 15:54

What Prince and Princess Doolittle! Even before her illness Catherine was the laziest working royal closely followed by Willie! Even now she’s in remission he’s not stepped up to support his father who is still undergoing treatment! It’s a shame that if anything happens to Charles the crown cannot bypass them and go to Anne, she’s worth 10 of the Wales’s!

Anne is wonderful, I agree. I think it’s easy to beat Meghan and Harry, to be fair I can’t think of a couple that doesn’t win over them. I’d rather have Pat and Frank from east Enders than Meghan and Harry, any day of the week.

Horserider5678 · 09/08/2025 15:57

SammyScrounge · 09/08/2025 15:40

From the earliest days of Meghan's arrival. She made me uneasy. The frequent batting of her eyelashes which accompanied the looking upward into his eyes with adoration were so blatantly false thay I couldn't believe Harry fell for it. It was all Bmovie staged.

And you’re clearly pissed because they are happy! Why would you be uneasy about someone you don’t know? Catherine’s mother totally engineered her relationship with Willie! And when Willie dumped her she mooned over him until he came back, something MNers would be highly critical of should be a poster on her 😂

thepariscrimefiles · 09/08/2025 15:57

Lavenderandbrown · 09/08/2025 15:38

Things I have noticed about MM ….
not a single friend at the wedding. Not a sorority sister or childhood friend or fellow industry friend. Jessica M was a recent friend and she conveniently supplied her son for the wedding party
MM expression or the way her head is turned is often out of sync with other royals at events. She’s got a content expression they look to be grieving she’s facing directly at a camera thus creating a cameo picture opportunity while everyone else is facing forward. She looks to be always performing or seeking solo attention.

Royal fashion did not suit her. Not the dusty pink not the white while pregnant not the green with kidney bean beret not the white collared dress with large hat.

when she and H are exiting the garden party (where supposedly she uttered “I’m bored” and Hand M were asked to leave ) her exit walk showcasing her back screams to me “I have to walk out of here with head held high” as does the solo M and H walk down the steps and then down the aisle in the white dress right before finding out they have no seats

she was an actress of some sorts but she really has some salacious footage out there

of course she knew about the royal family… she was photographed in front of BP as a young teen and if she didn’t she certainly wasn’t curious about the world

she does talk way too much about herself as if she is soooooo interesting but shes not in every podcast every episode of everything

she was not a philanthropist/ activist of any type prior to Harry

the estrangement from all her family is so very counter to life in the royal family

Edited

Meghan was defintely involved in philanthropic causes prior to meeting Harry. She volunteered in a soup kitchen on Skid Row as a teenager.

She became a counsellor for the international network One Young World in 2014, spoke at its 2014 summit in Dublin and attended the 2016 opening ceremony in Ottawa. Also in 2014, she toured Spain, Italy, Turkey, Afghanistan and England with the United Service Organizations.

In 2016, Meghan became a global ambassador for World Vision Canada, traveling to Rwanda for the Clean Water Campaign. After a trip to India focused on raising awareness for women's issues, she penned an op-ed for Time magazine concerning stigmatization of women in regard to menstrual health. She has also worked with the United Nations Entity for Gender Equality and the Empowerment of Women as an advocate.

PotolKimchi · 09/08/2025 15:54

What I find so amusing is that H&M have supporters, a whole Squad. Why?! They are mildly talented, hugely entitled (him), not very interesting people who haven’t done anything of note that would actually elicit global admiration. (Neither have W&K but they don’t seem to have a dedicated fan club in quite the same way).
I understand admiring sports stars- I was a Federer fan all the way. I can imagine being a fan of a huge movie star. Someone who writes best selling books. A painter or a musician of extraordinary ability.

Someone whose research has saved lives.
I am baffled by why seemingly intelligent independent women would be falling over themselves for a woman who seems to define herself by a title she got by marrying someone whose principal claim to fame is an accident of birth (aka he’s born royal).

Horserider5678 · 09/08/2025 15:54

DeLaRuiz · 09/08/2025 11:37

Much lolz. No contest, Kate and William win all day, everyday.

What Prince and Princess Doolittle! Even before her illness Catherine was the laziest working royal closely followed by Willie! Even now she’s in remission he’s not stepped up to support his father who is still undergoing treatment! It’s a shame that if anything happens to Charles the crown cannot bypass them and go to Anne, she’s worth 10 of the Wales’s!

jeffgoldblum · 09/08/2025 15:50

KellySeveride · 09/08/2025 15:43

I am a H and M supporter. My user name is a nod to a rather handsome character in Chicago Fire….so your theory is a bit bolloxed

Theory? 🤣
i asked a question because in the rf topic there are four posters all with similar names!
did I imply that only posters with that format were the only supporters? No .
my question was answered.
you seem to have taken something that has nothing to do with you very personally!
why?

KellySeveride · 09/08/2025 15:43

jeffgoldblum · 09/08/2025 13:15

Op , I have a question that I would love your help with?
why do m and h supporters always have three word user names?
and the same format too ?
discripter , colour , animal?
@BluntPinkNewtthanks

I am a H and M supporter. My user name is a nod to a rather handsome character in Chicago Fire….so your theory is a bit bolloxed

SammyScrounge · 09/08/2025 15:40

BluntPinkNewt · 09/08/2025 11:44

From her first public appearances - Invictus Games, the engagement interview, and her early royal engagements, she brought a different energy and style that got a lot of media attention. Whether people liked her or not, she clearly made an impact.

From the earliest days of Meghan's arrival. She made me uneasy. The frequent batting of her eyelashes which accompanied the looking upward into his eyes with adoration were so blatantly false thay I couldn't believe Harry fell for it. It was all Bmovie staged.

SL2924 · 09/08/2025 15:40

I think that K and W were threatened. Kate, while she seems nice, is very much an alpha female and I don’t think there was room for more than 1. I genuinely think people underestimate her.

I don’t particularly mind M&H and I feel sorry for them given the family situation they are in- whether they caused it or not. Having said that, anyone who would release a video of themselves twerking in the labour suite like M did wasn’t realistically going to last in the RF. What they think is ok is just too at odds with the Monarchy.

Lavenderandbrown · 09/08/2025 15:38

Things I have noticed about MM ….
not a single friend at the wedding. Not a sorority sister or childhood friend or fellow industry friend. Jessica M was a recent friend and she conveniently supplied her son for the wedding party
MM expression or the way her head is turned is often out of sync with other royals at events. She’s got a content expression they look to be grieving she’s facing directly at a camera thus creating a cameo picture opportunity while everyone else is facing forward. She looks to be always performing or seeking solo attention.

Royal fashion did not suit her. Not the dusty pink not the white while pregnant not the green with kidney bean beret not the white collared dress with large hat.

when she and H are exiting the garden party (where supposedly she uttered “I’m bored” and Hand M were asked to leave ) her exit walk showcasing her back screams to me “I have to walk out of here with head held high” as does the solo M and H walk down the steps and then down the aisle in the white dress right before finding out they have no seats

she was an actress of some sorts but she really has some salacious footage out there

of course she knew about the royal family… she was photographed in front of BP as a young teen and if she didn’t she certainly wasn’t curious about the world

she does talk way too much about herself as if she is soooooo interesting but shes not in every podcast every episode of everything

she was not a philanthropist/ activist of any type prior to Harry

the estrangement from all her family is so very counter to life in the royal family

ARichtGoodDram · 09/08/2025 15:36

What’s astonishing is that Harry didn’t understand that or didn’t explain it to Meghan before they got married. There will be ups and downs and ups and downs.

I think Harry's neglect (for want of a better word) in preparing Meghan for what his family and life were actually like is something often overlooked.

When you think of some of the things that obviously surprised her and every single one is because he didn't explain it to her, and/or didn't make sure he himself knew enough to explain it to her.

She didn't know that they curtseyed to the Queen even in private, until she was on her way to meet her. Same with the thing about being barefoot and in jeans when meeting William and Kate and then being formal.
Thinking that your partners famous family behaved very formally in public and then informally like any other family in private isn't a ridiculous thing on her part. It's ridiculous that he didn't prepare her for the fact that the Queen is the Queen who gets a curtsey when she's in Westminster abbey, but she's also the same Queen who gets a curtsey at a private family lunch.

In the Oprah interview Meghan clearly believed that Archie should have been titled as a prince when he was born and that was changed. That's just incorrect. He would never have been titled that until his Grandfather was King. The changes made for William's children were about the potential sexism row if he had a girl first due to the primogeniture changes, not because they were favoured over Harry's children specifically.

She said she didn't need help from anyone else because she had Harry to teach her, and that should have been correct. He should have been savvy enough to teach her the ins and outs of the family business. He either wasn't, or he chose not to.

Personally I think it's quite telling that the one person that seemed to not understand the detail of how the family worked and what the press would be like is the one that he actually got down the aisle.

CoffeeCantata · 09/08/2025 15:30

thepariscrimefiles · 09/08/2025 15:21

William is famously work-shy. His elderly aunt does more engagements than he does. What causes does William highlight? I haven't heard of any so I don't think he is doing it very well. I think that the Queen's life could probably be described as a life of service but certainly not William's.

You are showing your ignorance here. A quick google would set you right on most of your misconceptions.

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