To think my friend is being ridiculous about her BF’s parents money

The bit that puzzles me is that she thinks that as a mere GF they'd help her in any way. Wife, yes. But they have no obligation to someone who isn't related to them, even if they like her.

Well tbh that would be a bit of karma

People get married for all reasons

Plenty end in divorce

Isn’t marrying for Love just as big a gamble ?

You can be perfectly content and happy in a relationship without the “passion” .. those feelings fade. What’s wrong with building a future with someone you get on with ?

As the perceptive previous poster intimated you are referred to Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice.

Not perceptive enough to realise that Elizabeth wasn't being serious.

As the perceptive previous poster intimated you are referred to Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice.

She sounds smart. I always went for love and now I’m single and broke lol. Next time I’m going for money.

Some people treat marriage like a business contract.
She is one of them.

It would not make me unfriend her though. What difference would it make to your friendship anyway?

My FIL is a multi millionaire. He has about 8 properties, multiple cars, lots of liquid cash, and flies business class, several times a year to take exotic holidays.

In the 17 years that I have been with DH, he has gifted us the princely sum of £0.00

We are okay for money, but DH's brother is on the breadline, and has been broke ever since I've known him. They live on a horrible estate, riddled with drug takers, there's no money for treats or holidays, and they have 2 small kids as well, who are obviously FIL's grandkids. They get no help from him at all.

If FIL lives until the average age that men live, on that side of the family, then DH will be 70 before he inherits and BIL will be 73.

She might be waiting for a veerrrryyyy long time.

Women came with a dowry often too and the matched marriage suited the families, keeping the wealth protected.

I don't blame her one bit.

I can't befriend someone like that. Feels so low class. I know a few multi millionaires. They can smell gold diggers from a mile away and thye are not stupid with money, hence they are wealthy.

Wouldn’t she now be ‘someone who you had thought was a close friend’ , not a close friend op? Now you’ve realised how shallow and deceitful she can be?

It would be an exquisite natural consequence though

Lots do it and couldn’t live without a comfy life, often they end up divorced but it’s up to them, you moaning about it won’t change it.

She’s being foolish banking on this. Families with that level of wealth put measures in place to protect it from opportunists. She may benefit through him during their relationship, but that money won’t be hers, or something she’ll likely ever be entitled to a portion of.

Meh - if she wants to base her long-term relationships on economic prospects then she can do that. What's the guy like? Is he head over hills in love or does he just want a nice girl on his arm and a woman to keep?

Traditionally it was the main reason why people got married. The man provided a sound financial base for the marriage, and the woman provided beauty, charm and grace (and children!) That goes for arranged marriages as well. It doesn't mean they're necessarily going to be unhappy.

All right if both parties understand that's the deal. Not if one thinks they're in a loving relationship and the other is just seeing £££ signs.

It's a pretty big gamble - the parents might live for many years, they might have massive financial setbacks and end up with very little, they might leave the money in trust for grandchildren, they might choose to set up a charitable foundation and only leave a small amount to family...

And have the statistics changed? Last time I looked a majority of marriages survived.

On that logic, we’re all going to die, so why worry about anything?!

What about personal honour, self esteem and morals? Marrying for money is a form of prostitution which is anathema to many of us and certainly deceptive - a lie - unless both parties to the marriage are very clear about the basis of the relationship.

But women had far fewer rights, generally didn't do paid work or had to give it up on marriage if they did, and couldn't own property or directly inherit over a male heir, so that kind of thing made more sense and was accepted.

A majority of marriages end in divorce anyway so what difference does it make if you marry for love or money?

Traditionally it was the main reason why people got married. The man provided a sound financial base for the marriage, and the woman provided beauty, charm and grace (and children!) That goes for arranged marriages as well. It doesn't mean they're necessarily going to be unhappy.

I’d let her crack on with the unhappy life she’s headed for. If he doesn’t see through her first. She’ll learn.

It sounds as though she wants an easy life, financially, has finally met someone she thinks can provide that for her, but doesn't like him enough to be excited about being with him.

Does she really think her boyfriend and his family won't see right through her?

Your mate is a gold-digger