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Original poster

On holiday and I don’t know if I’m unreasonable!

642 replies

SunnyBlueSeal · 07/08/2025 15:01

I’m really hoping for some perspective here. We are currently in Spain with my friends for a holiday. It’s us ( myself, DH and DC 14,16 ) and my friends ( Kate, Neil, DC 14,17) obviously names are changed. Kate was my friend for a few years through the activities. They invited us for a holiday with them. We booked two different villas about 5min walk from each other and right on the beach. Since we got here, Kate and my DH are spending more and more time together. This is our full third day here, and so far today, they met running at 7am and booked a spontaneous paddle boarding for themselves at 10am. We were all on the beach later and went for a lunch. I went back to the villa to get some plasters and they both turned up. My DH said he is changing his top as he and Kate will walk to the town to get a few bits. All of the DC are spending their time on the beach learning windsurfing with the local club so I don’t need DH to help with childcare. Kate’s husband Neil has a work project to do so he spends about 5 hours a day working in their villa. I’m starting to feel like a 3rd wheel to my friend and my DH. I’m getting grumpy when I’m around them and I don’t want to push him away but I don’t know how to get out of this mood. And another thing which got me thinking is at the dinner, Kate asked for a sparkling water and my DH said he wants some too. He never drank fucking sparkling water but when I pulled him on it, he said it’s because I only drink a still water so he did too. So for years you were drinking still water because of me? Have a sparkling water if you want! Something is feeling odd and I can’t put my finger on it

OP posts:
Alicehatter · 07/08/2025 23:33

RedRec · 07/08/2025 23:31

Love the sparkling water detail 🤣🤣🤣

Show quote history

Perfectly pass agg! 🤣👏

RedRec · 07/08/2025 23:31

Moveoverdarlin · 07/08/2025 23:15

Bit odd that he didn’t mention the boat trip no?

I’d reply to Kate. ‘Oh he didn’t mention the boat trip, like I said though, we’ve got family plans so will catch-up with you tomorrow night. Have fun on the boat trip if you guys still go. Night night. Xx

I’ll be fucked if I’ve got some woman telling me when and what I’m doing on my family holiday.

If your husband kicks off about that here is your chance…I’d say ‘I’m not one of the kids, this is my holiday too, why the fuck are you and Kate booking fucking boat trips without asking me and it takes her to tell me! I’m not some 12 year old drip that’s just tagging along here! What’s the problem? Do the boat trip another day, I want it to be just us tomorrow, that’s ok isn’t it? Of course if you’d rather go for some sparkling water with Kate followed by one of your runs, and an intimate paddleboard, I’ll understand and I’ll get back in my box and just stay in the apartment and carry on SHITTING MYSELF!!

Love the sparkling water detail 🤣🤣🤣

thebraveryofbeingoutofrange · 07/08/2025 23:30

AzureCats · 07/08/2025 23:18

Dang I was hooked until I realised that between shitting your holiday bed and posting on mumsnet would usually take more than 20 minutes to sort out. Then the boat murder is straight out of Ripley.

Great film!

DorothyStorm · 07/08/2025 23:28

Why would she book a joat trip for when her husband was working? Surely if he is only doing 5 jours a day, he can start at 7 when they go running and be done for lunch.

BunnyVV · 07/08/2025 23:26

Neil and Kate have marriage problems. His working is not acceptable on a holiday. Is he spending quality time with his kids?
Instead of addressing her marriage problems Kate is being realiy immature and trying to get your husbands attention. She wants to make your life on holiday a misery because it sounds like her life at home isn’t great.
your husband is being a massive bellend to both you and his kids. (And Kate’s kids). Kate is doing this to see when her husband is going to pay attention.
your husband needs to get some self respect and put his family and your dignity first. Where in earth is your husbands integrity??? Why is he giving Kate attention? The teenagers aren’t stupid and they will be picking up on this

thebraveryofbeingoutofrange · 07/08/2025 23:25

ColumboOnTheCase · 07/08/2025 23:13

Ooh it's been a pretty good plot so far I might watch/read it now so I'll know how this ends... Does it end badly for Kate?

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I feel sorry for Kate, she sounds lonely and unloved and now she’s going to die? 😨

AzureCats · 07/08/2025 23:18

Dang I was hooked until I realised that between shitting your holiday bed and posting on mumsnet would usually take more than 20 minutes to sort out. Then the boat murder is straight out of Ripley.

thebraveryofbeingoutofrange · 07/08/2025 23:16

I’m still at the shit the bed bit. Is the mattress clean?

Moveoverdarlin · 07/08/2025 23:15

Bit odd that he didn’t mention the boat trip no?

I’d reply to Kate. ‘Oh he didn’t mention the boat trip, like I said though, we’ve got family plans so will catch-up with you tomorrow night. Have fun on the boat trip if you guys still go. Night night. Xx

I’ll be fucked if I’ve got some woman telling me when and what I’m doing on my family holiday.

If your husband kicks off about that here is your chance…I’d say ‘I’m not one of the kids, this is my holiday too, why the fuck are you and Kate booking fucking boat trips without asking me and it takes her to tell me! I’m not some 12 year old drip that’s just tagging along here! What’s the problem? Do the boat trip another day, I want it to be just us tomorrow, that’s ok isn’t it? Of course if you’d rather go for some sparkling water with Kate followed by one of your runs, and an intimate paddleboard, I’ll understand and I’ll get back in my box and just stay in the apartment and carry on SHITTING MYSELF!!

ColumboOnTheCase · 07/08/2025 23:13

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Ooh it's been a pretty good plot so far I might watch/read it now so I'll know how this ends... Does it end badly for Kate?

AMurderofMurderingCrows · 07/08/2025 23:11

Well, shit the bed... literally.

If you're going to fart tomorrow, make sure you do it in a headwind and that Kate is behind you. SPLAT. Kate covered in shite.

Tealpins · 07/08/2025 23:07

But what does DH say about the boat trip? He booked it, so what did he say to the whatsapp from you saying there's a family day? I also don't understand the 4 people on a boat when there's 8 of you?

Praying4Peace · 07/08/2025 23:04

Red flags

Beesandhoney123 · 07/08/2025 23:03

Well, Kate isn't your friend. And I'm surprised your dc haven't pointed out to their dad he seems to hanging round their friends mum.

Ref the boat, I would say on what's app ' oh no! Well we can't go , as already made plans. I can't see it on our group whats app so had no idea! Have a lovely time'

If your dh insists on going, let him and speak to her husband about his wife and how lonely she is. Ie turning up at yours

Wantosleep39 · 07/08/2025 23:03

Why don’t you tell them both to their face that you are extremely uncomfortable that they are spending so much time together. And it needs to stop. No matter if there is something or not. You are not questioning that at the minute you are just asking it should stop. It’s inappropriate for so many levels. That’s it just say that to both at the same time. That’s what I would do

Mumofnarnia · 07/08/2025 23:01

SunnyBlueSeal · 07/08/2025 22:41

So after changing the sheets, I thought we are going to be ok. We can laugh about the unfortunate events but we are ok. In the mean time while all of this was happening, Kate texted back saying that her and my DH booked the boat for tomorrow ( for all of us ). I felt so stupid that my DH forgot to tell me about that! Anyway, the boat is ‘drive yourself’ as it’s only for four people. Neil is working and DCs are windsurfing. If I end up on that fucking boat with Kate and my DH tomorrow, only one person is coming back🤣

And why did you feel stupid that your DH did not tell you about it? It’s almost as if you’re worried about what this Kate thinks of you and I get the feeling she senses this. No she should be worried about what you think of her.

Beach11 · 07/08/2025 23:00

What is your OH saying about boat trip?

Plantaineater · 07/08/2025 22:58

I'm only here for the next episode in this gripping story...the boat trip

Wadadli · 07/08/2025 22:58

SunnyBlueSeal · 07/08/2025 15:01

I’m really hoping for some perspective here. We are currently in Spain with my friends for a holiday. It’s us ( myself, DH and DC 14,16 ) and my friends ( Kate, Neil, DC 14,17) obviously names are changed. Kate was my friend for a few years through the activities. They invited us for a holiday with them. We booked two different villas about 5min walk from each other and right on the beach. Since we got here, Kate and my DH are spending more and more time together. This is our full third day here, and so far today, they met running at 7am and booked a spontaneous paddle boarding for themselves at 10am. We were all on the beach later and went for a lunch. I went back to the villa to get some plasters and they both turned up. My DH said he is changing his top as he and Kate will walk to the town to get a few bits. All of the DC are spending their time on the beach learning windsurfing with the local club so I don’t need DH to help with childcare. Kate’s husband Neil has a work project to do so he spends about 5 hours a day working in their villa. I’m starting to feel like a 3rd wheel to my friend and my DH. I’m getting grumpy when I’m around them and I don’t want to push him away but I don’t know how to get out of this mood. And another thing which got me thinking is at the dinner, Kate asked for a sparkling water and my DH said he wants some too. He never drank fucking sparkling water but when I pulled him on it, he said it’s because I only drink a still water so he did too. So for years you were drinking still water because of me? Have a sparkling water if you want! Something is feeling odd and I can’t put my finger on it

FFS OP, woman up! I just read this scenario to my husband and told him HE is no 1 man in my life and I am no 1 woman in his. He has three female uni friends he’s known for decades but as his wife, no matter what, I’m numero uno. I’ve jokingly told him I’d have his knackers for earrings if he pulled a stunt like your twat of a husband did today

First thing tomorrow, in front of both of them, smilingly, and passive aggressively, tell Kate you’re taking your husband back and if she wants male attention, to have a word with Neil. I’m shocked you’ve let it go this long, so put your granny pants on and stop putting up with this pisstaking shit

Good luck 💐

Lotsofsnacks · 07/08/2025 22:57

HAL200 · 07/08/2025 22:56

Why are you letting her and your H decide how you spend the day? 🤔

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This! It’s you holiday too… why is she the boss?

jumpintheline · 07/08/2025 22:56

I need to know what happens on this boat 🍿

HAL200 · 07/08/2025 22:56

SunnyBlueSeal · 07/08/2025 22:41

So after changing the sheets, I thought we are going to be ok. We can laugh about the unfortunate events but we are ok. In the mean time while all of this was happening, Kate texted back saying that her and my DH booked the boat for tomorrow ( for all of us ). I felt so stupid that my DH forgot to tell me about that! Anyway, the boat is ‘drive yourself’ as it’s only for four people. Neil is working and DCs are windsurfing. If I end up on that fucking boat with Kate and my DH tomorrow, only one person is coming back🤣

Why are you letting her and your H decide how you spend the day? 🤔

murasaki · 07/08/2025 22:55

Just tell her you are having a family day. Again.

Seasonofthesticks · 07/08/2025 22:51

Mumofnarnia · 07/08/2025 22:50

I would tell Kate that your DH won’t be coming as you’ve already told her that you’d like to spend time with your DH and dc as a family and that her and your DH have had ample time together and you are not having your whole holiday being taken over by plans that were made without consulting you first.

Yeah, this

Mumofnarnia · 07/08/2025 22:50

I would tell Kate that your DH won’t be coming as you’ve already told her that you’d like to spend time with your DH and dc as a family and that her and your DH have had ample time together and you are not having your whole holiday being taken over by plans that were made without consulting you first.