Family wedding with obligatory religion. What's an atheist to do?

Totally OPs place to decide whether she wants to do something or not. She decided not.

And she has two options. Go or don't go .

I don't think I like your brand of .... Christianity is it? Or something more sinister....?

Sorry I see you got it sorted

Did they specify which god they want you to pray too...there are 100's

Not your place to make any sort of stand, disagree publicly, make any kind of fuss at all. Just not your place.

As you feel so strongly, you have only one option. Don't go.

He's a strange kind of a Christian if he wants someone to say a prayer when they don't believe in it. If someone were praying for me, I'd like it to be sincere.

Problem solved! Glad to hear that.

I would just find a lovely poem or something and read that out.

No one is going to notice that you aren't singing or praying. I just stand and maintain a dignified silence at these events whilst thinking good wishes for the people celebrating.

@Littledogball close family have each been asked to read a prayer out, it’s not just the normal congregation prayers which you can avoid saying

If he knows you are not religious he isn’t going to expect you to pray out loud!! And nobody is going to check if you are singing. Just stand up and sit down with everyone else and you’ll be fine.

You obviously shouldn't be saying a prayer though!

Attend and be respectful but no need to join in surely.

You're an actor so your very job is saying a load of words out loud in public that aren't actually true.
Plus you're an atheist so you don't believe that saying or singing any particular set of magic words makes them true.
On the other hand those particular words are much more meaningful to the groom. Why not just tell the groom you'd be happy to read the words and join in the songs but remind him you'll be acting when you do it because you don't believe in it yourself?
If he's happy to go along with that compromise then why wouldn't you be? It doesn't mean anything, after all.

There are relatives in my family that are religious and when a huge life event happens I get an invite and I sit quietly listening. Not only because I'm an atheist but I am quite shy and introverted, and there would be a lot of people there I don't know.

If I was asked to read a prayer in front of a congregation I would be more worried about stage fright than if my beliefs align with the text! Thankfully I doubt if any of my relatives would propose such a thing.

Can you say you are happy to sing but are not able to offer prayers. Can offer hopes for their future if desired or not take part in that bit.

My children and I don’t sing religious songs at Christmas. Not our holiday. I gave them the choice about the nativity and they participated but not as the religious characters - one was a sheep and one a tree I think? They politely listened to the songs that aren’t for us as it’s always fun to experience new things, but no - we wouldn’t sing along.

It would be super uncomfortable for me if my husband joined in on our Shabbat prayers or sang along in synagogue. He doesn’t believe it, he doesn’t have a connection to it and it’s not his thing.

Plenty of people can attend a religious event without participating in it. I respect everyone’s traditions and love seeing them, and am always happy to learn more, but I think it’s disrespectful to lie.

Are you religious?

There's nothing fake about meaning the sentiment of a prayer, just because you mean it direct from you to them, rather than via god?

There's zero difference between praying for someone to get better and
a hearfelt wishing for them to get well soon.

At no point did I suggest not meaning it, I just suggested maybe the OP doesn't in fact mean the sentiment and that's the real problem.

This is what confuses me to be honest. I wouldn’t lead a prayer in a church as a non religious person, it just seems… rude.

Are you religious? I assume you are because you seem invested in this thread but your attitude to religious practices seems odd to be honest. Is feigning religion like making polite conversation about someone’s dress? I thought it was more significant than that, for those who believe in the existence of God.

Im Catholic. I would do psalm reading for a couple. I wouldnt be offering my spoken aloud prayer for them

And im not sure why the bride and groom wouldnt just give reflection time and ask people to include them in their prayers and/or thoughts

Hi OP, I’m surprised they’ve asked you to do a religious reading when you’re not religious. That feels odd to me and not positive for anyone (believers on non). I am not religious but I respect religious practices (where they don’t infringe on other people’s liberties) and I’d gladly participate in a religious ceremony but I wouldn’t lead a prayer, that would be inappropriate in my view because it would be making a mockery of people who genuinely believe.

OP, I’m surprised, if your family member knows your views that they have asked you to read an obviously Christian prayer. I don't think you are being unreasonable and I think I would find something as close as possible in sentiment but non-religious and offer to read it. If they can’t agree to that then I would respectfully decline to do a reading. Respect must go both ways. There was an analogy earlier about vegetarianism, surely if you were a vegetarian they wouldn’t ask you to eat meat for them ?

Yeah, that would be a hard pass from me. Other people being religious is fine, wanting to shove that down your throat however, they can do one.

Why indeed.

Why join the couple in celebrating at all???

Because there is usually a piss-up after the ceremony guff is out of the way. Probably a free meal into the bargain.