To not know how on earth I can go back to work?

The thing is, I live in a remote area, salaries are low, jobs are sparse and I suffer with chronic anxiety so I’m a little bit picky (wouldn’t be able to do bar work/waitressing) ideally I’d like a desk job, don’t mind working with the public I just don’t want to be serving.. don’t ask why, it’s just a me thing.

And you want term time only? Have you got a pet unicorn?

You’ve boxed yourself into a corner there. Which thing can you change to improve your opportunities? Can you study while you work so few hours now?

If you work in a school local to you, there must be a need for childcare for current pupils in the holidays? Could you set up some sort of holiday club targeted at the school you work in?

After school club looks ok though...
Run by external organisation.

A TA job at school I'm at is a very tough number, with stress, poor pay and high expectations.
It is not an easy option...not in my school anyhow!

Does the school have an after school club? Keep eye out for jobs there?

Second job in the evenings - cleaning or caring.

You say you live near family. Can they help out?
Could you do remote working?
Cleaning?

Some local councils offer job clubs and help with CVs. You could drop off your new CV at local businesses. There are lots of small rural units, small businesses. You probably drive past a few.

It might be better doing courses and getting qualifications over the next year.

OP, I’ve only read your posts.

You need to suck it up and move. You’re too far away from your husband’s work, and you’d find better job opportunities in a larger town/city. Start hunting close to where your husband is, and then get looking to move.

I think you do need some flexibility. It’s hard to know how much is ‘I can’t’ and how much is ‘I don’t want to’ (sorry if that sounds harsh.) I do sympathise as I currently work two days a week and the money is rubbish compared to what I’d get if I was three days but it’s just what works at the moment.

I have a couple of friends in this situation, they work it by working nights and weekends, it also means they don’t have a need for childcare at all which saves a lot of money.

I think you either have to deal with the anxiety and take a job you don’t really want, or accept that you’ll be poor until your kids get a little older and don’t need holiday childcare.
If you’re bored when you’re not working could you do CBT or something to try to overcome your anxiety? Or look for other remote jobs?

Jobs vary so much op and you may be able to find one in which you can WFH and not have much to do and look after your children at the same time, and manage to do the school runs too.

3 of my friends are able to do the above fairly easily - 1 in the charity sector, 1 in a creative field and the other in marketing. One of these friends even manages to take her children for whole days out and just checks her emails occasionally and sometimes replies to them.

My job is hybrid and unfortunately due to it being a demanding role, I am not able to look after my children while working, nor can I go offline to pick up my children.

What do you want from this post? You've put a lot of "reasons" why you can't do anything, you admit you're picky, you don't accept paying for childcare (even though obviously you would earn money on those days that would pay for childcare, could take holiday etc)... what answers could be acceptable for you? Do you want to be told you can't work?

This, I was going to suggest cleaning jobs.

I know you said you wouldn’t like serving but what about a kitchen assistant in a school (serving kids is very different than being a waitress.) I live in a rural area but there are lots of jobs currently being advertised in school kitchens. Maybe you could do this in addition to your current role?

Move house closer to DH work and more opportunities for you?

Can you find a second job? Although it might not be term time but you'd only have to cover one during the holidays.

Could you be a PIP assessor?
Seems they have a range or flexible options.

Second job? What about cleaning, dog-walking, cat-feeding?

Sounds like you need to move to be honest.

You say jobs are sparse because of where you live and your husband has to travel far for his work as well. So move.

More job opportunities, your husband not having to travel so far for work meaning he can do more pick ups/drop offs and life will be easier all round.

Are there any care homes near you OP? It may not be your first choice but you could work 2 nights a week as a Carer. I did this when my DC were young & it was more than possible to request permanent Friday & Saturday nights so that DH is home while you sleep the next day.

It doesn’t give you much family time at weekends but it does solve the income & childcare issues.

Could you set up a tiny business? Either see if there’s enough work eg cleaning where you are to see you through all year, 4 hours a day at £20/hr (the rate in my area) would be £400 a week. Ironing, which you could research what local service washes charge and work it out from that? Or something more sporadic that uses what your good at- remote admin, virtual assistant type work; making and selling; tutoring in a skill you have.