To ask older lady to wear headphones in cafe

It's not his fault but it is his responsibility.

I agree he knew exactly what you were getting at, and deliberately chose to take your comments as a bit of a joke. That's why he's a wet lettuce.
But you could have said, 'The noise is very antisocial; have you ever spoken to them about it?'
If that's too blunt for you, then on your way out you could have told him you had to leave because of the antisocial noise and, very sorry, but you'd have to look for another cafe from now on.

I thought it was just the youth who conduct calls on speakerphone on trains/in cafes but from your post the phenomenon seems to be catching on!

I was sitting opposite a girl in her 20s on the train recently while she spent the entire journey having a loud conversation on FaceTime with a friend. I don’t understand the selfishness of assuming that a carriage load of people wants to be forced to listen to your inane babble about what you’re going to do at the weekend. Or anything, actually. It’s just inconsiderate.

I once went to a country pub in quite an affluent area and there was a large group who had just finished their meal. One must have been a grandmother who was letting her toddler grandson listen to Peppa Pig really loudly.

I thought about saying something, but felt they would be rude about it. So instead, I put on Blippi at full blast and let my kids watch it. There were no other people around to annoy them. I never allow that so the kids were really happy to get that opportunity and I wasn't constantly entertaining them like I normally would do.

The grandmother had the audacity to start looking over at us like we were the devil himself!!!! I could not believe it. But it shut off Peppa Pig.

Mehehe

He sounds like a wet lettuce.
But also, you had a great opportunity to tell him how much you dislike their noise, and you didn't.

There are some who go out of their way to disrupt people who use cafes as an office to do work in. I think you'll probably meet the cafe crowd if you do at some point.

Ear defenders are pretty efficient.

Is it bad to suggest a google review of cafe saying loud phone use means you wouldn’t go back? Or to tell the cafe they’ve lost a customer because of her? Seems unjust.

In theory they don't allow it in the quiet carriages but you can't really blame the guards for not enforcing it as they will just get a tirade of abuse.

The cafe owners are wet if they don't stop it though. Is Tiktok woman really worth it to them? I'd tell her to desist or not come anymore.

I was on a train recently, and a women got on and sat at the same table as me. She immediately started looking and noisy stuff on her phone, and a guy nearby asked her if she had headphones she could use. She said, "It's only tiktok," like that makes it ok! He had another couple of words (I couldn't hear what) and she stopped. Thank you random man!

I hate noise but it isn't my train, bus, cafe so if the owner/operator allows it I just have a choice to put up with it or go elsewhere. Easier with a cafe than a train.

Most of us are, hence all the complaints about the selfish minority. I wish there were big signs on public transport telling people not to play anything on their devices without headphones. The odd brief phone call is acceptable, but a thirty minute face time in a loud voice really isn’t. We were subjected to one such in the ‘quiet’ coach on the train to Scotland. A chap probably in his fifties.

I don’t care if someone is working quietly in a cafe, if they are a paying customer. Unlike the noisy t*s they don’t disturb anyone.

Worst offenders for this are young people on public transport, customers in TKMaxx who think it’s their lounge and very often people mid 60s plus. If you go in the massive M and S cafe in Manchester, often there’s not a spot to sit where you can avoid device noise because the M and S demographic think it’s absolutely fine to play videos of their grandchild’s nativity or make calls on full volume.
i went to France recently and I only heard a device once - they were English. Why can’t we be civilised here?

Why does somebody sitting with a laptop annoy you? I couldn't care less if someone is sitting there with a friend, their phone, a newspaper, a laptop, a book. It has no impact on me.

Jeez the density of some of the posters on here is incredible. It's a wonder they don't fall through the Earth's crust when walking.

Ha,ha I didn’t notice my sh*t typo ! Quite apt though.

We do learn...oldies I mean...😎

I agree she should not have to shit her self off, lol, I know it's a typo but made me smile. I just meant if all else fails. It's a fine balance isn't it between mitigating for the passive aggression of entitled septo-generian on the one hand and creating space and peace to work and how much time you have for the conflict. Another tack might be to chat to the manager when she's not around (noisy one) and ask if they'd be prepared to put signs up for ear phone use for social media or no social media in quiet work space area perhaps. Have some noise absorbing room dividers? Should be pretty easy to make?

I hate this
I work as a receptionist and people sit watching videos on their phone which is annoying and distracting. I always tell them to switch the sound off or use headphones. Incredibly entitled

It's annoying regardless of someone's age, but equally, I get annoyed with people using cafes and coffee shops as their office. 🤷🏼‍♀️

But the issue is that noise cancelling headphones block out all noise, not just the selfish phone/ipad listener. OP uses ( I am going to stay out of the working in public places discussion as not relevant) uses a cafe because she feels isolated and doesn’t find the other normal cafe noises of people chatting and coffee being made distracting and presumably enjoys it, otherwise she would sit at home and save money on coffee and breakfast.

There is a particular timbre to the iphone/ipad noise that’s different, I suppose a TV would be similarly annoying, but even then it’s not quite so tinny. Why should OP have to shit herself off from the rest of the world because of a selfish idiot.

I was on a bus in the middle of the day the other week and there were three, yes THREE, men in their 30s or 40s watching TikTok vids or sport on phones with no headphones. They didn’t know each other so weren’t sharing videos.

I was astonished. It’s like nobody gives a fuck anymore. As they were blokes and I’m a small, middle-aged woman, I just did the British thing of huffing and rolling my eyes in disgust.

I would ask the staff to put up some sort of polite reminder poster or have a word. However, I do think people have become more entitled and you’re on a hiding to nothing, sadly.

In the country I live in, older people are the worst for this. Young people generally use headphones, but older people just blare out their phones at full volume.

My theory is that they missed the "iPod"/"walkman" era.. most of us grew up when portable music needed headphones, devices didn't have speakers, so we got used to wearing headphones.. add in that it's polite, and it became a norm.

But in my country you now have a generation of 60-80 year olds who never did portable media, but now have to use a smartphone, and some of them discover videos/social media... But they have no "norm" for wearing headphones.

The considerate ones may learn, but most don't.

That would totally do my head in too. I can’t stand being anywhere near anyone whose personal devices are too noisy. Even if they are elderly and so potentially a bit deaf (as most of us get deafer as we get older),

I would speak to the cafe owner and see what she says. Even when that women isnt there to see if there’s anything she’d be prepared to do about it. I bet she wouldnt hesitate to tell a child to turn the sound down. The problem is that this is a woman. Who is liable to kick up a stooshie. As youve already found out.