do people think this is normal behaviour

I think this is a bit unusual. It’s just easier to start a new conversation if you don’t have to search the person again.

Same but I just delete when it gets to the end of a conversation or the end of the day or whatever. I don’t think people are wrong not to delete or anything, it’s just what I do.

I don’t do Facebook or anything though, just WhatsApp really.

It’s perfectly normal for people to not go through and delete their chat histories

There isn’t a soecific topic in most of mine. There might be a patch where it’s ’what time shall we do coffee tomorrow’ but that’s incidental to the rest of the chat which is just…chat. Not about anything much. It doesn’t end.
Edit: with fb it isn’t even really on your phone. It’s on fb.

Well I suppose just at the end of a specific topic. My chats ramble too but I don’t feel the need to keep them forever and it’s probably not a good idea to have years worth of info on your phone like that, although maybe that’s a bit paranoid! It’s not like I’m going to scroll through years of random chats, so I delete them whenever it feels appropriate.

What do you mean by done? My chats are with close friends and they’re never really done. We just ramble 9n some more the next day.

This. It never occurred to me to delete them.

Gamer didn't twist it though.
You have said a few times on this thread that you thought they should have come round and watched films with you because you supported them previously. Almost as if it were 'owed'.
People are trying to help you understand that a) friendships don't work like that b) you help people because you want to, not to store up credit and c) people you have met at a group for people seeking mental health support, are probably not best placed to be the support you are looking for.

Oh, and MN isn't there supposedly for people to help each other. It is an internet forum which people use for all sorts of different reasons in all sorts of different ways. It has different areas for different purposes. There is loads of support in all sorts of areas of MN - including Relationships and Mental Health boards, but you chose to as if you were being unreasonable. This board is known for being a bit more robust and will give you honest opinions. Which actually do help some people, but the board isn't there 'for people to help each other'.
Despite that, many people have been very supportive on this particular thread.

I’ve never deleted a chat on anything aside from exes. I don’t save them but never occurred to me to delete them

I seem to be an outlier in that I always delete chats once they're done!

Kindly, OP, this is you. You seem to have misunderstood the point of groups for anxiety sufferers and the purpose of Mn, which is just a chat forum. You also posted in AIBU which is famously the most combative board on Mn. Maybe in future post on MH.

But in answer to your question, it's your behaviour that isn't 'normal'. Most people don't delete chats. And you sound paranoid and aggressive.

It's not clear whether there's any basis for you considering people from your anxiety group as friends, either. Suffering from the same MH problems is not necessarily a sound basis for any kind of friendship. Do you even like these people? Have you known one another a long time? Do you meet socially outside the group? Defending someone's boyfriend from 'verbal abuse' at a bus stop doesn't constitute a friendship. Neither does visiting someone in hospital. Both were arguably kind things to do, but friendship isn't that transactional.

You asked if you were being unreasonable OP, the vast majority of people including myself have said yes you are. If you don’t think you were and aren’t prepared to accept otherwise, why post here? If you only want to hear your own opinions you would be better off not asking the internet.

‘Am I being unreasonable’ really isn’t here to provide support. An overwhelming number of posters think you’re being unreasonable. You can either choose to take that on board or ignore it and carry on.

This thread is horrendous......

The OP is clearly vulnerable. It's quite obvious wouldn't you say if she's explaining these scenarios. And she's called paranoid a few times?

No, this isn't being paranoid ffs. This is her realising after the fact that people can't really be trusted and maybe her senses tell her things about this person she doesn't know well enough that are a bit of a red flag.

And then weird snotty replies come in here - to someone in this clearly vulnerable position - because she's not replying as you would all like.

It's fish wifery on steroids. Horrible.

Friendships are not transactional. You don't add up 'you owe me points' when you do someone a kindness off your own back OP.

The kind of friendship you're looking for takes time to get that deeper connection. It's not gained by sticking up for someone or visiting them in hospital.

It doesn't seem like those groups are meeting your needs. You're trying to force something that needs to happen naturally.

Kindly @ReapersSideKick you can’t judge everyone on the behaviour of shitty people from your past.

Not everyone is going to do you wrong however maybe just use this as a lesson and don’t talk about deep stuff over messages. Save it for a coffee meet up :)

I think you have to do as you would be done by, not as you have been done (to channel Charles Kingsley.) This does mean you probably give out more than you get back, but life is not always balanced, and if you know how it feels to be treated poorly - well, I couldn't live with myself if I knew I was the deliberate cause of that feeling in others. It doesn't mean saying yes all the time, but it's possible to say no kindly.

Chats are automatically saved on Facebook. People don’t go out of their way to save them.

You sound a little paranoid and you’re thinking too much into this.