Scolding DS's accident

Increasing my fingers and toe’s for you. I doubt he will change. He showed you who he was the first time he told of your son.

why so many Brit’s value there boyfriends and friends here dogs over there children baffles me…🤔

No I’m not, you weirdo. I have a degree in English, I know exactly what I’m saying. Read it again and try harder.

Well quite. That poster has made herself look rather foolish. But it was just a mistake that she forgot she said that …

He's shown you who he is. The apology etc mean nothing. He'll do it again, unless you remove him from your son's home. The place where he should feel happy and safe.

Well, it sounds like quite a difficult terrain to negotiate - keeping dogs and cats apart. I am sure I would be like your son and occasionally forget to close a gate.

Your partner seems to have forgotten that he has moved into your house with your child - it is not his house and your boy is not his child. This unwarranted scolding suggests this man will make your son's life a misery, even when it isn't that apparent to you - nasty looks, sarcastic comments, etc. If you have ever lived with someone who is constantly critical and looking out for things you have done wrong, you will know that it creates insecurity and anxiety. Do you really want to put up with sulking and silent treatment and do you really want to expose your son to this sort of man?

Are you OP's partner?

Right, I don’t care how much you post but you said you posted 5-6 times when at that point you had posted 28 times, so the person saying you were dominating wasn’t wrong were they?

Forums are for posting on, 28 times in how long this thread it is not much, many others have posted as much or more than me. I am not getting into a silly tit for tat argument about who is allowed to post and who isn’t. The forum isn’t gatekept, hide the post if you don’t wish to see differing opinions.

28 times according to MN

I know some people here say it’s not fair that he scolded him to begin with. But this is a two and a half year relationship and you live together, so yous really need to have a sit down and talk about what discipline (if any) he is allowed to give. Should he relay everything to you, and if so what happens if you’re not there and he is, and your son does something dangerous/wrong albeit more than leaving the door open. Is he allowed to scold him then?

when you all live together and it’s a serious relationship it’s not the same as mums new boyfriend telling off the kids which obviously isn’t right

some of the women on here posting also post in step parent threads about how it’s ok for a stepmother to discipline. But apparantly not a stepfather.

I’ve posted 5-6 times and this thread is pages and pages long so I don’t think so.

Scolding YOUR child, sulking, silent treatment? This would not be a relationship I'd be continuing.

unless partner gives the cats to his aunt/mum (I forget who it was) that’s not really fair. I agree it’s shit on the animals and dog was there first but DP should be moving back if he doesn’t want to give the cat to a loved one, i have no idea why they didn’t speak about the pets before making a decision about moving in together. He would’ve known cat was terrified of the dogs

It’s not quite just leaving a door open. Kid knows that the dog terrifies the cats. It was a mistake but it does warrant a word however silent treatment is wrong.

The future eggs shells I bet your child has to walk on will really shape the relationship you have with him once he is old enough to move out.
I hope this man is worth that.
And after 2 months if the dog cant even go upstairs for 1 minute then the plan is not working.

Either the dog or cats need to go.
Do you have a litter tray upstairs?

That in itself is not nice.

I would consider re homing the cats sooner rather than later.

Ds made a mistake that an adult could have easily made and did not deserve the cruel reaction that he got from your partner. For someone who has apparently known your son for 2.5 YEARS, it’s strange that he seems to know nothing about 8 year old boys.

If you’d made the mistake would he have reacted the same? Why should an 8 year old boy have to tolerate that awful behaviour? Poor ds 😢

Get him out to protect his cats.

Yes quite odd. I'm not convinced that poster has children or knows anything about them.

What does your ds think of your dp @ellie09 ?

No one is agreeing with your toxic parenting beliefs. Just Drop it.

I wouldn't have ever had him move in with 2 cats, without the pets bonding first, so now everyone is uptight and stressed, keeping doors closed, stressing the animals and your child.

No, it's not acceptable. The kid is 8, it was an accident. Do not hold children to impossible standards. Leaving a door cracked, once in two months?! That kid is doing fabulous.

He was oh so worried about the cats being scared but has actively set out to scare your DS.

This will not end well.
Please do not put your son in this horrible situation

God I hate posts like this, why move him in? The worst thing you can do for a child is move a man in and this one sounds awful.

Your poor Ds.

If this was my dd he would be moving straight back out.

I just hope OP is sensible and intelligent enough to have zero tolerance in place for anything remotely touching on this behaviour again.

OP he needs to know there are no more chances, once was enough and you need to mean it!

Two bloody months he’s been there and already throwing his weight around, at least you know early OP. Don’t let your son down!