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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that most rich people don’t actually care about those struggling?

107 replies

ZippyMintCat · 05/08/2025 11:22

I keep seeing wealthy people make grand statements about philanthropy, “giving back”, and wanting to help but when it comes down to it, most of them don’t actually seem to care. They live in their own bubble, completely disconnected from the struggles of ordinary people.

They might donate to charity for tax breaks, post about “awareness” on social media or make vague comments about how “hard work pays off” but they rarely do anything that actually makes a difference. Meanwhile, the cost of living keeps rising, people are struggling to afford basics, and the ultra-rich just keep hoarding wealth.

Of course there are exceptions but in general, AIBU to think that rich people don’t really give a shit? Or am I just being cynical?

OP posts:
TimetoGetUpNow · 05/08/2025 13:01

Trusts and foundations give around £3.8 Billion to U.K. charities a year. Many of these trusts and foundations come from individual and family wealth or from big companies.

So while many don’t - many do.

socks1107 · 05/08/2025 12:57

You sound very jealous tbh. How do you know what they think or feel?
most people live in bubble, rich or poor and finances are a private thing

whackamole666 · 05/08/2025 12:52

I'm not rich, not by any definition, but I live in my own bubble .....

I think the majority of people do as well. rich or poor.

CinnamonCinnabar · 05/08/2025 12:51

I'm not sure why people automatically blame 'the rich' when most tax evasion is by small businesses.

In 2023-2024 small businesses were responsible for 60% of the tax gap (the gap between what people should pay and what they actually do) - that's over £28 billion of lost tax revenue.

'Wealthy individuals' (defined as those earning over £200K a year) evaded £2.34 billion of tax in comparison, whilst for criminals it was £4.2 billion.

It's the side hustle people and cash in hand workers who don't care about society.

https://www.gov.uk/government/statistics/measuring-tax-gaps

Measuring tax gaps 2025 edition: tax gap estimates for 2023 to 2024

HM Revenue and Customs (HMRC) statistics and methodological annexes relating to measuring tax gaps.

https://www.gov.uk/government/statistics/measuring-tax-gaps

RegularHere · 05/08/2025 12:50

ComtesseDeSpair · 05/08/2025 12:15

They might donate to charity for tax breaks, post about “awareness” on social media or make vague comments about how “hard work pays off” but they rarely do anything that actually makes a difference.

But ultimately, why do you feel people with money are obliged to do more than this? People who choose to work with “poor people” should care and have ideas about how to solve poverty and do things which make a difference; people who choose to go into politics as a career should care and have ideas about how to solve poverty and do things which make a difference. I’m not convinced anyone else is necessarily obliged to “make a difference” beyond making charitable donations if they choose to and using their position to raise awareness of causes they support.

I'm not sure I'd couch it in terms of "obligation", but for me, the reason I should give is luck. I am bloody lucky to have been born when and where I was (mainly), and with the attributes I have (also). By the standards of virtually any other time or place I might have been born, I've won the lottery. That's why I'm still alive into my middle age, literate, free, comfortable. The reason I'm rich (sorry to be crass, but for brevity and because it's the terms this thread was couched in) are down to my attributes and decisions and hard work, but again, that's largely genes and upbringing too when you strip everything back.

The same could be said for almost all (maybe literally all) rich people. That's why I think they/we should give.

I'm an equal-opportunity curmudgeon though. People at the other end of the scale in the UK are also bloody lucky. They haven't won the lottery at all. But in any other time in the UK, and most parts of the world still today, their life would be truly even more horrible, and probably short. I suppose that makes me a sort of old-school patrician type. We are are of equal moral worth and we all owe what we have (whether that is little, subsidised by others, or lots, thanks to things we didn't choose) to fate. I can't quite derive an "obligation" to give from that, but I also see very few moral grounds on which to hoard what we end up with.

BopItWinner · 05/08/2025 12:50

I think in general most people don’t really care about others. Wealth doesn’t really come into it. It’s human nature to just look after your own.

I have also seen a few people moan about rich people not caring, only to get rich themselves and turn into the same sort of people as the rich ones they previously moaned about. Again, it’s human nature.

GasPanic · 05/08/2025 12:45

I mean tbh you have to be pretty much completely non empathic to sit on a billion pounds and not care about the rest of what is going on in the world in terms of disease/poverty.

I mean just think about how much a billion pounds is. 1000 million pounds.

No one personally has the need for that kind of money. Let alone 10s to 100s of billions.

If you aren't doing something useful with it, either benefiting society through investment or using it for charitable causes then there has to be something wrong with your outlook somewhere, as it is just accumulating money for the sake of accumulating money.

ZippyMintCat · 05/08/2025 12:39

HoskinsChoice · 05/08/2025 12:32

How many of these mega-rich types do you know personally? Because you'd have to know someone to know if they care. I presume you wouldn't make this sweeping statement unless you actually had some evidence...

I don’t personally know billionaires but I’ve interacted with and observed people in that truly insulated bracket through work, media, and public life. My view also comes from patterns in how extreme wealth is spent, invested, and protected, and from data on philanthropy vs tax avoidance, lobbying, and wealth hoarding. It’s not about claiming all wealthy people don’t care but about recognising how often the reality doesn't match the image they present.

OP posts:
Dolphinosep0tatoes · 05/08/2025 12:39

I think it's fair to say that not enough rich people care or care enough. Whether this is down to ignorance, politics, a lack of empathy or a combination of both will vary.

Digdongdoo · 05/08/2025 12:37

ZippyMintCat · 05/08/2025 12:34

Not the same influence as a billionaire, of course but even a few million puts you in a position to fund projects, invest in businesses or initiatives you believe in, support causes in a substantial way or open doors for people through connections. It’s not about single-handedly fixing the world but there’s still a lot more capacity to make an impact than most people will ever have.

A net worth of a few million isn't going to go far funding much at all, even if they gave away every £. You seem a bit delusional about what real lasting change costs.

ZippyMintCat · 05/08/2025 12:36

Judiezones · 05/08/2025 12:25

How would you know? Why wouldn't rich people be doing a lot for others without publicity because they don't want to show off what they're doing?
If I were you I'd be more worried about that massive chip on your shoulder.

Some might be doing a lot quietly and I’d be happy to be wrong about this. But from what I’ve seen and read, the scale of the need versus the visible impact from those with extreme wealth doesn’t really match up. It’s less about wanting them to “show off” and more about questioning whether their actions are proportionate to their means.

OP posts:
EarthlyNightshade · 05/08/2025 12:36

I agree OP. If wealthy people really cared, they would use their wealth to create equality. It's not by chance that rulers of the more corrupt countries have wealth, and have historically always had wealth, while their people starve.
The "evidence" is the inequality.

(I am not including MNers on 6/7 figure salaries in this, there is not a lot they can do about inequality and I am sure many of them do care)

GasPanic · 05/08/2025 12:34

Suppose it depends what you mean by "rich".

Take a trip over to the inheritance tax thread.

Most people are into preserving their wealth above everyone else's, even from beyond the grave.

Champagne socialists tend to talk a good game but when the chips are down it's all about me and mine.

ZippyMintCat · 05/08/2025 12:34

Digdongdoo · 05/08/2025 12:24

What kind of influence are you imagining someone with a few million might have?

Not the same influence as a billionaire, of course but even a few million puts you in a position to fund projects, invest in businesses or initiatives you believe in, support causes in a substantial way or open doors for people through connections. It’s not about single-handedly fixing the world but there’s still a lot more capacity to make an impact than most people will ever have.

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MrsBuntyS · 05/08/2025 12:33

The man I work for funds a charity providing therapy to disadvantaged children. The man my husband works for funds an environmental charity focussing on the ocean. Both are British and very focussed on philanthropy in their areas of interest. Most very wealthy people I know, I’m not one of them, give to charity or are very involved in philanthropy in one way or another, giving money or time or both. Not me, I’m just out here trying to make ends meet!

HoskinsChoice · 05/08/2025 12:32

ZippyMintCat · 05/08/2025 11:36

I’m thinking people with serious wealth, not just comfortable but the kind of rich where you have multiple properties, don’t think twice about major purchases and can afford to live entirely off investments. I’m not talking about people earning a decent salary, I mean those who are truly insulated from financial pressure. It’s less about the number and more about the detachment that often seems to come with that level of wealth.

How many of these mega-rich types do you know personally? Because you'd have to know someone to know if they care. I presume you wouldn't make this sweeping statement unless you actually had some evidence...

ZippyMintCat · 05/08/2025 12:30

skippy67 · 05/08/2025 12:24

Like the Royal family, you mean? Yeah, they don't give a shit.

Yep, they’d definitely fall into that category. Extreme wealth, total insulation from everyday realities, and a level of detachment that makes it hard to genuinely understand what most people are dealing with. And I’d agree, their actions don’t exactly scream deep concern for the struggles of ordinary people.

OP posts:
Ddakji · 05/08/2025 12:28

ZippyMintCat · 05/08/2025 11:47

I’m aware that by global standards I’m fortunate but my post was about the extreme wealth held by the ultra-rich, and the power they have to make systemic change on a scale ordinary people can’t. I do my bit where I can but I’m not in a position to shift policy, fund infrastructure, or redistribute billions. It’s not about pretending I’m not privileged, it’s about questioning why those with vastly more aren’t doing far more.

Of course you can shift policy. It’s called voting.

Judiezones · 05/08/2025 12:25

How would you know? Why wouldn't rich people be doing a lot for others without publicity because they don't want to show off what they're doing?
If I were you I'd be more worried about that massive chip on your shoulder.

Davros · 05/08/2025 12:25

My observation from having a disabled child who is now 30, is that many of the charities, services, special provision is set up and supported by the “rich” or better off

ZippyMintCat · 05/08/2025 12:25

ComtesseDeSpair · 05/08/2025 12:15

They might donate to charity for tax breaks, post about “awareness” on social media or make vague comments about how “hard work pays off” but they rarely do anything that actually makes a difference.

But ultimately, why do you feel people with money are obliged to do more than this? People who choose to work with “poor people” should care and have ideas about how to solve poverty and do things which make a difference; people who choose to go into politics as a career should care and have ideas about how to solve poverty and do things which make a difference. I’m not convinced anyone else is necessarily obliged to “make a difference” beyond making charitable donations if they choose to and using their position to raise awareness of causes they support.

I get where you’re coming from, not everyone with money has chosen a role where tackling poverty is their main job. But when someone has extreme wealth, they also have resources, influence and access that go way beyond what most people can offer. I’m not saying they should all dedicate their lives to activism but the ability to fund meaningful change or shift policy conversations is a privilege that comes with responsibility. For me, raising awareness and donating small amounts feels like the bare minimum when you have that kind of reach.

OP posts:
Digdongdoo · 05/08/2025 12:24

ZippyMintCat · 05/08/2025 12:22

True, ‘rich’ is definitely relative and I agree that what counts as wealthy depends on your perspective and life experience. For me, I’m talking about the level of wealth where you’re totally insulated from everyday financial concerns, where even a major unexpected expense wouldn’t make a dent. Whether that’s a few millions or billions, once you’re at that level, you have options and influence that most people will never have and I think that comes with a responsibility to use it well.

What kind of influence are you imagining someone with a few million might have?

skippy67 · 05/08/2025 12:24

ZippyMintCat · 05/08/2025 11:36

I’m thinking people with serious wealth, not just comfortable but the kind of rich where you have multiple properties, don’t think twice about major purchases and can afford to live entirely off investments. I’m not talking about people earning a decent salary, I mean those who are truly insulated from financial pressure. It’s less about the number and more about the detachment that often seems to come with that level of wealth.

Like the Royal family, you mean? Yeah, they don't give a shit.

VintageDiamondGirl · 05/08/2025 12:23

Like most things, some do and some don’t. And some keep it quiet.

I was on a scout camp once and a man in a horse appeared on the neighbouring field. He spoke briefly to the scout club leader. I asked her who he was and she said that we were camping on his land and that he was the clubs main sponsor. Nothing was ever mentioned or written anywhere about this. I thought that was nice.

ZippyMintCat · 05/08/2025 12:22

the80sweregreat · 05/08/2025 12:15

When I was a child anyone whose parents owned a car I saw as rich because we didn’t have one.
These days I see people with over a million as rich , but maybe they don’t think they are ? They certainly are not compared to someone like Elon Musk. It’s all relative isn’t it ?

True, ‘rich’ is definitely relative and I agree that what counts as wealthy depends on your perspective and life experience. For me, I’m talking about the level of wealth where you’re totally insulated from everyday financial concerns, where even a major unexpected expense wouldn’t make a dent. Whether that’s a few millions or billions, once you’re at that level, you have options and influence that most people will never have and I think that comes with a responsibility to use it well.

OP posts: