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Original poster

Double booked feel guilty

181 replies

TheOpalFox · 03/08/2025 20:58

I have double booked myself . I said I’d have my friends kids for her, but now I have booked a
holiday. I feel so guilty
i cant change the holiday :( but didn’t want to let my friend down
any tips please ? Am I a terrible friend?

OP posts:
Thickasabrick89 · 04/08/2025 06:37

itsgettingweird · 04/08/2025 06:30

Mn is weird sometimes.

usually it’s all “they’re your kids - you need to sort something. No one owes you childcare”.

Now everyone thinks someone should t take a holiday to have someone else’s kids for 2 days.

OP it’s not great timing but I would never expect a friend to give up their annual holiday to look after my child. I’d be annoyed if they didn’t tell me straight away.

The issue here was it was already promised and put in the diary.

If they had said no from the offset, MN posters would say 'oh yes, well you can't expect others to look after your children' but that wasn't the case here.

itsgettingweird · 04/08/2025 06:30

Mn is weird sometimes.

usually it’s all “they’re your kids - you need to sort something. No one owes you childcare”.

Now everyone thinks someone should t take a holiday to have someone else’s kids for 2 days.

OP it’s not great timing but I would never expect a friend to give up their annual holiday to look after my child. I’d be annoyed if they didn’t tell me straight away.

autienotnaughty · 04/08/2025 05:58

It’s poor but you just have to apologise and own it. It will depend on how much she values your friendship and how much the cancellation affects her as to how this will impact on your relationship going forward.

HappiestSleeping · 03/08/2025 22:50

fthisfthatfeverything · 03/08/2025 21:11

Wise up!!

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I know, I know. Some people are flakey, I get it.

AvidJadeShaker · 03/08/2025 21:39

SomeOfTheTrouble · 03/08/2025 21:38

Would be a struggle to book any childcare at this short notice though I’d have thought!

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I was thinking maybe a holiday club, obviously it depends on where they live.

SomeOfTheTrouble · 03/08/2025 21:38

AvidJadeShaker · 03/08/2025 21:34

Apologise and offer to pay for 2 days childcare.

Would be a struggle to book any childcare at this short notice though I’d have thought!

AvidJadeShaker · 03/08/2025 21:34

Apologise and offer to pay for 2 days childcare.

Spies · 03/08/2025 21:30

TheOpalFox · 03/08/2025 21:26

Have done

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I hope you at least rang her rather than just sent a text.

I still can't understand how you booked the holiday without checking your diary though.

Original poster
TheOpalFox · 03/08/2025 21:26

londongirl12 · 03/08/2025 21:22

Yes if you were my friend I would be pissed off with you. But you need to tell her NOW!!!

Have done

OP posts:
Notmyreality · 03/08/2025 21:25

Jesus what a lot of drama from everyone. Apologise, say you made a mistake and enjoy your holiday.

londongirl12 · 03/08/2025 21:22

Yes if you were my friend I would be pissed off with you. But you need to tell her NOW!!!

SomeOfTheTrouble · 03/08/2025 21:20

TheOpalFox · 03/08/2025 21:15

the 20th of August . Meant to be having them for 2 days

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Did you not check your calendar at the time of deciding which dates you were going to book a holiday for?

ScrambledEggs12 · 03/08/2025 21:18

Don't you check your calendar when booking a holiday?

Whaleandsnail6 · 03/08/2025 21:18

TheOpalFox · 03/08/2025 21:15

the 20th of August . Meant to be having them for 2 days

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Well given you are not going to cancel your holiday, you're just going to have to tell her asap since its very short notice to give her time to sort something else.

Don't keep putting it off cos you are scared of her reaction. Thats unfair.

Original poster
TheOpalFox · 03/08/2025 21:15

Whaleandsnail6 · 03/08/2025 21:14

How long till the holiday/babysittimg duties?

If its tomorrow then you are massively unreasonable since you are likely leaving her in the lurch. If its 6 months from now, then it's not too bad.

You have to tell her as soon as you can.. it's likely that she will be annoyed as you are letting her down but thats the situation

the 20th of August . Meant to be having them for 2 days

OP posts:
Whaleandsnail6 · 03/08/2025 21:14

How long till the holiday/babysittimg duties?

If its tomorrow then you are massively unreasonable since you are likely leaving her in the lurch. If its 6 months from now, then it's not too bad.

You have to tell her as soon as you can.. it's likely that she will be annoyed as you are letting her down but thats the situation

Original poster
TheOpalFox · 03/08/2025 21:13

TheNightingalesStarling · 03/08/2025 21:10

How long were you supposed to be having the kids for?

2 days

OP posts:
fthisfthatfeverything · 03/08/2025 21:11

HappiestSleeping · 03/08/2025 21:08

The priority is the one you committed to first. Looks like you won't be going on holiday. Either that, or take friend's child / children with you.

Wise up!!

fthisfthatfeverything · 03/08/2025 21:10

Tell her your hubby booked it and didn’t know you’d arranged to look after her little one

TheNightingalesStarling · 03/08/2025 21:10

How long were you supposed to be having the kids for?

HappiestSleeping · 03/08/2025 21:08

The priority is the one you committed to first. Looks like you won't be going on holiday. Either that, or take friend's child / children with you.

FlipFlopShopInHawaii · 03/08/2025 21:08

When is this happening?
You need to tell her ASAP so she has time to find someone else to take her kids.

Spies · 03/08/2025 21:07

TheOpalFox · 03/08/2025 21:06

My battery went and my calendar is on my phone . Will it affect my friendship ?

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Of course it will affect your friendship. To be honest it sounds like a crap excuse. Surely you wouldn't book if you hadn't checked your availability...

Original poster
TheOpalFox · 03/08/2025 21:06

SomeOfTheTrouble · 03/08/2025 21:05

Had you forgotten you had agreed to have her kids on those dates or did you book the holiday knowing it was going to mean letting her down?

I had forgot about having her kids

OP posts:
Original poster
TheOpalFox · 03/08/2025 21:06

Spies · 03/08/2025 21:01

How on earth do you just randomly book a holiday without checking your prior plans. If there's no way of cancelling the holiday which would be the best option given you made plans to your friend first then you need to let your friend know asap although I can't see how it won't impact your friendship going forward.

My battery went and my calendar is on my phone . Will it affect my friendship ?

OP posts: