To think my cleaner shouldn’t bring her own child to work?

I think you're being unreasonable! She's not causing any problems from what you've said. This sounds like you want to be annoyed at it but aren't sure why.

Although the OP has shown no concern about damage or theft…..

Honestly, your need to keep on with the “whataboutery” is odd. The child is there for a total of twelve hours over the six weeks holiday. It’s very unlikely that anything is going to happen really.

You seem overly anxious about unlikely events.

It was probably a Christmas gift, as if that matters.

Those saying that the cleaner isn’t paid enough - how much do you pay your cleaner if you have one (I don’t) and why do you choose to pay what you think is pennies instead of a living wage?

Not to mention the fact that the child has an ipad and they don't come cheap.

Heres some news for you - accidents happen - this means that the breakage wasn’t intentional. Have you broken something unintentionally? Of course you have and the same for your family members and friends.

Those saying that the cleaner isn’t paid enough - how much do you pay your cleaner if you have one (I don’t) and why do you choose to pay what you think is pennies instead of a living wage?

Do you think that the cleaner would want this charity? Probably not as the child is unsupervised and she might be embarrassed to receive this benevolent gift. Donate to those in need instead.

childcare is extortionate, your cleaner probably can’t afford it. Be kind - the child isn’t bothering you. Maybe get some nice snacks next time she’s there

I would feel a lot of compassion for both. If it happened in our house I would put together a box with a few craft items/age appropriate coloring/games/snacks. It sounds like they are both in a difficult situation and it would be horrible for the girl to feel like a burden.

Thank you so much to everyone who’s replied - I didn’t expect this many responses and I’ve read every single one. It’s been really helpful to see things from different angles, even if I still feel a bit conflicted.

Just to clarify a few things that came up - no, she didn’t ask in advance if she could bring her daughter. The first time it happened I thought maybe it was a one-off emergency, so I didn’t say anything. But this has now happened three times in a row and I’m realising it may be the plan for the whole summer. Her daughter isn’t disruptive, but she is there for the full two hours and I do hear the iPad sometimes. It’s not loud, but it’s not silent either. More than anything it just changes the feel of things - it’s different having a child in the house, even if she’s well behaved.

I should also say that I really like my cleaner and trust her completely. She’s been brilliant over the past year and has even picked up on little things around the house that I’ve missed. I don’t want to upset her or make her feel like she’s done something terribly wrong, especially when I know childcare over the summer is expensive and hard to arrange.

At the same time, I think it’s reasonable to feel unsure about the boundaries here. I’m paying for a professional service, and it just feels a bit off having someone’s child sitting in my living room while I’m upstairs on work calls. I don’t have children myself, so maybe that’s part of why it’s feeling intrusive. I also worry about the what ifs - like if she had an accident or touched something fragile.

I’m going to speak to her, gently. I’ll try to keep it kind and non-confrontational - just say I’ve noticed her daughter’s been coming and that I do understand the challenges with childcare, but I wasn’t expecting to have someone else in the house and it’s made things feel a bit awkward. I’m hoping she’ll understand and maybe has an alternative arrangement lined up soon anyway.

Why would a 10yo child break things? She hasn't broken anything yet has she?

Np I have been on mumsnet for 15 years and there absolutely are double standards ,regarding men and women which you are choosing not to see

Not the greatest of arguments
No I don’t expect danger everywhere - I just know what can happen in these kinds of situations . I’m sorry if the difference is too nuanced for you to understand.
My life is not awful -it’s pretty fabulous actually 🤗

Sounds like OP hasnt asked her why she is bringing her either. There's nothing wrong with asking. But wondering about it and saying nothing isnt helpful. She'll get a straight answer without asking on social media. Whether or not she will put up with it depends on how much she values her cleaner

It must be awful to imagine/expect danger everywhere. It's not naivety, it's real life.

If you didn't have the chance, fair enough. I think it's unlikely that the cleaner hasn't had a chance to ask though and I do think it is rude to just turn up with a child if asking in advance is possible.

OP might have still said no but if she didn't get the chance to say yes or no in the first place.

I would feel a lot of compassion for both. If it happened in our house I would put together a box with a few craft items/age appropriate coloring/games/snacks. It sounds like they are both in a difficult situation and it would be horrible for the girl to feel like a burden.

You ARE getting the service that you are paying for.

Child is sitting on the sofa.

My view is YABU. From your account, you are barely aware that the cleaners child is there.

Ive had various trades bring their children. Always well behaved and polite children.

The wee girl will remember doing this. Will remember accommodating her mums need to earn. Might respect her clothes/treats more. She will likely look up to you - someone who can afford regular paid help at home. Id make an effort. Make it memorable. Make her feel welcome. They is obviously no other support around. Dont be cold/hostile. Its a non-issue. She might well enjoy a 5 minute chat with you. You might enjoy it.

Good luck.

I have been so surprised at people’s total naivety about the risks of an employed person bringing a child to the house they are working in. They are all living in la la land and if it all goes tits up ( as things sometimes do) I’m sure there will be much hand wringing and bewilderment .
we are not living in some type of ‘it takes a village’ fairytale. People can be mean and litigious. You accept the child of a person you employ onto your property at your own risk. You are liable!

As I often had no warning, no I didnt have the chance to warn anyone. Summer holidays were problematic. I guess I was just lucky and worked with kind people. OP says she feels uncomfortable about it, so maybe would not have agreed to it.

I dont understand the fuss. It's not unusual where I live fir a parent to bring a kid during the school holidays. We all understand

Did you ask first or just show up with him?

I don't think OP would've had as much of an issue if the cleaner had asked her first. She might've still felt a bit uncomfortable with it but gone along with it if she knew the circumstances such as family childcare had let her down at the last minute and it was just for the summer holidays.

Just rocking up with your child and expecting others to be understanding is going to get some people's backs up.