To think most men wouldn’t survive a year living the life of an average woman?

FWIW, I don’t believe that you never find looking after your own children difficult.

Nobody has perfect angelic children that never present any challenge ever, and nobody is robotic enough to not feel that sometimes.

Your kids, like all others, must occasionally do things that you don’t like and/or frankly can’t be bothered with.

The idyllic “my children are perfect at all times” world doesn’t exist.

Phew for the last time…..

I don’t personally find looking after my own children, cleaning my own house, gardening and everything else I do difficult. That is because I intrinsically enjoy these things and have the time to do them properly at times of day that best suit me and my own energy levels. Time and energy are not infinite resources.

I would find these things more difficult if I added in paid work. I would worry constantly about my babies/toddlers being in someone else’s care (which I have very personal reasons for). I would hate having to call in sick to work when my children are ill, hate missing any school events, hate not being able to work in the same manner I did pre-children, hate interacting with my children when I’m rushed/tired and grumpy, hate wasting my evenings and weekends with squeezing everything else in that is needed to maintain family life and a family home.

I find looking after children and a home emotionally easier when you have the time to just focus on that. I hate multi-tasking. I am a perfectionist with very high standards. I accept that about myself, I’ve always been like that. I would genuinely drive myself insane trying to do everything at such a high level. Different personalities wouldn’t be like that to the same degree.

Phew for the last time…..

I don’t personally find looking after my own children, cleaning my own house, gardening and everything else I do difficult. That is because I intrinsically enjoy these things and have the time to do them properly at times of day that best suit me and my own energy levels. Time and energy are not infinite resources.

I would find these things more difficult if I added in paid work. I would worry constantly about my babies/toddlers being in someone else’s care (which I have very personal reasons for). I would hate having to call in sick to work when my children are ill, hate missing any school events, hate not being able to work in the same manner I did pre-children, hate interacting with my children when I’m rushed/tired and grumpy, hate wasting my evenings and weekends with squeezing everything else in that is needed to maintain family life and a family home.

I find looking after children and a home emotionally easier when you have the time to just focus on that. I hate multi-tasking. I am a perfectionist with very high standards. I accept that about myself, I’ve always been like that. I would genuinely drive myself insane trying to do everything at such a high level. Different personalities wouldn’t be like that to the same degree.

Phew for the last time…..

I don’t personally find looking after my own children, cleaning my own house, gardening and everything else I do difficult. That is because I intrinsically enjoy these things and have the time to do them properly at times of day that best suit me and my own energy levels. Time and energy are not infinite resources.

I would find these things more difficult if I added in paid work. I would worry constantly about my babies/toddlers being in someone else’s care (which I have very personal reasons for). I would hate having to call in sick to work when my children are ill, hate missing any school events, hate not being able to work in the same manner I did pre-children, hate interacting with my children when I’m rushed/tired and grumpy, hate wasting my evenings and weekends with squeezing everything else in that is needed to maintain family life and a family home.

I find looking after children and a home emotionally easier when you have the time to just focus on that. I hate multi-tasking. I am a perfectionist with very high standards. I accept that about myself, I’ve always been like that. I would genuinely drive myself insane trying to do everything at such a high level. Different personalities wouldn’t be like that to the same degree.

"I made the point that I managed to look after 2 under-3s entirely by myself and found it easy. I even took both to my own emergency dental appointment- it’s really not that difficult. I’ve managed multiple serious hospital appointments for 1 DC around their sibling. I wasn’t dependent on anyone for practical support."

You said it was easy. Now it's not easy? Which is it?

You also said it was pathetic mothers need help with their young children and it's disgusting to get grandparents to look after them so they can go and take care of themselves. So it's definitely easily right? Why are you making out it's difficult now in this post?

It's not the first time you can't pick a lane though is it. You've spouted 10 pages of contradictory nonsense at this point.

The point of the anecdote is to illustrate that she wanted to be a SAHM and couldn’t afford to. Some women do actually want to do this, and currently can’t. I think that’s wrong.

Okay. A bit unprofessional of her but fine. Being a nanny isn’t the most compatible with having a young family to be honest. Maybe she should look at a different career where she gets maternity pay. I’m not sure what the point of the anecdote is though - is it that the state doesn’t pay enough benefits to someone like the nanny who wants to raise kids without working?

"I made the point that I managed to look after 2 under-3s entirely by myself and found it easy. I even took both to my own emergency dental appointment- it’s really not that difficult. I’ve managed multiple serious hospital appointments for 1 DC around their sibling. I wasn’t dependent on anyone for practical support."

You said it was easy. Now it's not easy? Which is it?

You also said it was pathetic mothers need help with their young children and it's disgusting to get grandparents to look after them so they can go and take care of themselves. So it's definitely easily right? Why are you making out it's difficult now in this post?

It's not the first time you can't pick a lane though is it. You've spouted 10 pages of contradictory nonsense at this point.

Okay. A bit unprofessional of her but fine. Being a nanny isn’t the most compatible with having a young family to be honest. Maybe she should look at a different career where she gets maternity pay. I’m not sure what the point of the anecdote is though - is it that the state doesn’t pay enough benefits to someone like the nanny who wants to raise kids without working?

So that genuinely happened! Sitting in a sandpit whilst my eldest was playing with ones she was looking after. She told me she loves doing what she’s doing but really wanted to be doing it with her own children like I am. She told me I was so lucky and would give anything to be living my life. I wished her well and hoped she got the opportunity.

People went through a phase of over-sharing at the park during and after the worst of Covid for context. It was the only place a lot of us could go. I did also have a Mum who I had never met give me her mobile phone number to meet another day, she was craving company. Saw her giving others her number too. Also had neighbours out dog walking who I’ve known for almost 20 years tell me all sorts! Maybe this level of over-sharing was a time specific one! 😂

I’m not a liar. What’s the point?

I’ve honestly never seen someone avoid answering the actual question as much as this poster. It’s infuriating.

You still can't address actual points raised can you.

Try being a SAHM/homemaker who has looked after 2 close in age for the past 7 years with zero help or outsourcing.

I have been described as workshy, lazy and narcissistic. Apparently I do nothing of any value that nobody would miss or notice. Yet I know I have worked more hours directly caring for my children, my home and garden than when I had an actual FT paid job. I refuse to be gaslighted.

Yet I see threads on here right now about how hard juggling everything is. People being honest, people saying how upset they are that their house and garden are in chaos, they barely get any time with their toddler, their own health and well being is right at the bottom of the list. Wow, things have really moved on positively for women!

If you dare to say that you don’t have to live like this is you can afford not to, you get nothing but negativity. Well I absolutely refuse to live like these poor people I am reading about and run myself into the ground, and I am unapologetic about that.

Again, that’s twisting the nuance.

To be clear- I would find it extremely distressing as a mother to have been separated from my baby before I was ready. If I lived in day America, who have appalling maternity rights and many mothers are completely priced out of having barely a few weeks off, then yes, I would feel that society was an emotionally abusive place to be a mother. Causing stress to a mother is not great for their children. Mothers obviously feel different if it is their choice over the timing to start to reincorporate paid work again.

When mine were younger I had an experienced nanny telling me at the park that she would give anything to have my life. She was desperate to start her own family but was not yet able to financially. She was very upset and I don’t think it’s right that women who really want to be mothers are effectively being priced out of that option. To me that’s wrong as a society, and is harming women’s rights.

I respect any parent who prioritises spending time with their own children.

Who do you think I spend my time sitting next to and chatting with at baby and toddler groups, the park, soft play, local community centres? Plenty of nannies and childminders. They tell me all sorts, and I’m not impressed by a lot of it, no. One was planning her exit with us all because the final straw for her was the lovely child she worked with being absolutely distraught his own mother wasn’t at his weekend birthday party. The nanny couldn’t in good faith continue working for that family, she said the parents were both largely absent, disinterested and just threw money and stuff at their children. That’s not the type of mother I would ever aspire to be, no.

People talk, make no mistake about it.

This is such a joke. You’re just dumping on working mums for some reason, probably jealousy because literally nobody, even your own family, gives you the recognition you want for your extreme housework routine that you’ve convinced yourself is essential because it fills the time when your kids are at school. You’ve openly said that you don’t judge people for outsourcing domestic work, as long as they don’t work. You’ve said you respect parents who openly neglect their children and that the men who do this are good men, as long as their wife doesn’t work. You hold up huge families who are on benefits and likely to produce a next generation of benefits claimants as some sort of role model, again because they don’t work and just produce children. So embarrassing.

Latest in Things that Never Happened. What sort of nanny cries in the park to a stranger saying they want their life?

Try being a SAHM/homemaker who has looked after 2 close in age for the past 7 years with zero help or outsourcing.

I have been described as workshy, lazy and narcissistic. Apparently I do nothing of any value that nobody would miss or notice. Yet I know I have worked more hours directly caring for my children, my home and garden than when I had an actual FT paid job. I refuse to be gaslighted.

Yet I see threads on here right now about how hard juggling everything is. People being honest, people saying how upset they are that their house and garden are in chaos, they barely get any time with their toddler, their own health and well being is right at the bottom of the list. Wow, things have really moved on positively for women!

If you dare to say that you don’t have to live like this is you can afford not to, you get nothing but negativity. Well I absolutely refuse to live like these poor people I am reading about and run myself into the ground, and I am unapologetic about that.

Again, that’s twisting the nuance.

To be clear- I would find it extremely distressing as a mother to have been separated from my baby before I was ready. If I lived in day America, who have appalling maternity rights and many mothers are completely priced out of having barely a few weeks off, then yes, I would feel that society was an emotionally abusive place to be a mother. Causing stress to a mother is not great for their children. Mothers obviously feel different if it is their choice over the timing to start to reincorporate paid work again.

When mine were younger I had an experienced nanny telling me at the park that she would give anything to have my life. She was desperate to start her own family but was not yet able to financially. She was very upset and I don’t think it’s right that women who really want to be mothers are effectively being priced out of that option. To me that’s wrong as a society, and is harming women’s rights.

Try being a SAHM/homemaker who has looked after 2 close in age for the past 7 years with zero help or outsourcing.

I have been described as workshy, lazy and narcissistic. Apparently I do nothing of any value that nobody would miss or notice. Yet I know I have worked more hours directly caring for my children, my home and garden than when I had an actual FT paid job. I refuse to be gaslighted.

Yet I see threads on here right now about how hard juggling everything is. People being honest, people saying how upset they are that their house and garden are in chaos, they barely get any time with their toddler, their own health and well being is right at the bottom of the list. Wow, things have really moved on positively for women!

If you dare to say that you don’t have to live like this is you can afford not to, you get nothing but negativity. Well I absolutely refuse to live like these poor people I am reading about and run myself into the ground, and I am unapologetic about that.

Looking after kids is not easy. Fact.

Again, that’s twisting the nuance.

To be clear- I would find it extremely distressing as a mother to have been separated from my baby before I was ready. If I lived in day America, who have appalling maternity rights and many mothers are completely priced out of having barely a few weeks off, then yes, I would feel that society was an emotionally abusive place to be a mother. Causing stress to a mother is not great for their children. Mothers obviously feel different if it is their choice over the timing to start to reincorporate paid work again.

When mine were younger I had an experienced nanny telling me at the park that she would give anything to have my life. She was desperate to start her own family but was not yet able to financially. She was very upset and I don’t think it’s right that women who really want to be mothers are effectively being priced out of that option. To me that’s wrong as a society, and is harming women’s rights.