Husband leaves 3yo son in bath for a few seconds

Our neighbour wasn’t so lucky. I am in team stay in the room.

A few seconds to get a towel/flannel from a nearby cupboard in which you can still hear the child then maybe, but going downstairs to get a glass of water no - it can wait a few minutes till bath time is over. I’d leave a towel/flannel already in the bathroom if it’s a regular occurrence that he forgets.

those aren’t particularly high numbers it is true (relative to other risks), though we don’t know if that is because the risk of a child going under the water is inherently low or because people are usually supervising.- to be fair in threads like these you don’t that often hear people reporting that their child slipped under the water in the bath but they rescued them because they were sat next to the bath.

But it is such an easily avoidable thing (relative to things like choking or other accidents) so I still tend to side with the “not worth taking the risk” POV.

That article proves my point, did you not read it?

I said that not leaving the room in case you fall and knock yourself unconscious isn’t an appropriate assessment of risk because you could slip and knock yourself unconscious in the same room as your child. If you’re unconscious, it’s irrelevant whether your in the same room as your child or not.

You’ve tried to counter with an article about a woman who fell unconscious in the same room as her children and they drowned…

That proves my point. It’s no safer to be unconscious in the same room than in a different room.

Follow your instincts, OP. I think 3 is too young for a child to be left alone in the bath. When ours (now young adults) were little, I think the received wisdom was not to leave children younger than age 5 unattended in the bath. And I agree with PPs, and knowing my own propensity to get distracted, what happens if the adult gets distracted or even has an accident and is unable to return? It’s too risky.

What the hell. That is so suspicious!

I am left alone to parent at bath time usually plus I have spend 7 years as a single parent. At 3 I have never filled the bath high either. Leaving them for 1 minute tops has been needed sometimes like grabbing a towel when bag was empty. Ask dad if he could prep so he doesn’t have to leave 3 year old alone at any point and mention it makes you anxious leaving the 3 year old alone at any point.

My son is 9 nowadays doesn't need me and I've been pottering in and out of the bathroom for a few years. Always only a room away he is a noisy bather so I knew he was fine. He could bath mainly on his own at 6. I used to sit on the bed and tell him to wash his hair and body.😌

Know your child! For some it’s fine for others it’s a no - my eldest has seizures so doesn’t bath alone ever, not even as an adult - showers are safer

Downstairs is completely unacceptable.

Pottering around on the landing to grab a towel etc so they're never out of earshot is different and I think ok at 3.

I wouldn't go downstairs but will go into the next room, leaving the doors open and chatting away to my DC. Shallow bath, and we have a temperature limiter on the mixer tap so there's no chance of scalding. Different houses have different setups too. In our old house, I was physically closer to my DC in the bath when I was across the hall in my bedroom than I am from the other side of the bathroom in the new house.

What does he do when he's taking them out leave them on the drive while he starts running round grabbing a coat and shoes?

I left the room for that amount of time to get things. It was a long time ago but could generally hear them playing.

Surely you're not leaving a 3 yr old for 44 mins

I think in this case the title of the OP doesn't match the contents so if people are voting without reading the whole OP, of course it's fine to leave a child for a few seconds. But the the OP clearly describes a situation (going downstairs to get a glass of water) that is more than a few seconds so that's probably why the votes don't match the comments..

I’d be more worried about them turning on the hot tap or trying to climb out and hitting their head than straight forward drowning, plus at that age I had a 3 and 2yo who I bathed together so just didn’t trust them not to drown each other. I did leave the room to get a towel or pjs but would never have gone downstairs as it was just too far.

I think grabbing a towel is ok going downstairs i dont agree with. I use to get mine to sing why I grabbed things.

This!

Omg how hard is it to have an actual towel in the bathroom and to have a drink from the tap in said bathroom. He's crazy, 3yr olds should not be left unattended in a bath the absolute halfwit.

ridiculous. It is like he has got dementia and cannot prepare few towels and her pj laid out on the bed and the hairdryer , how difficult is this

A lot can happen in a minute.

I think 5 and over.

Having looked it up the figures apparently in the UK, approximately 3-4 babies under the age of one year drown in bathtubs each year. This seem to be due to lack of supervision and / or bath seat malfunction. A total of 13 children under the age of five die from drowning annually in the UK, with one in four of these deaths occurring in the bath.

The figures aren't as high as I expected. However, it's totally preventable and as a parent you would never forgive yourself. It's so tragic for everyone involved.

My friend had a near miss. They don't know if there will be any long term damage. His partner left him. She wouldn't let him have his kids unsupervised for ages. It took him a long time to rebuild the trust again. They coparent okay now.

This doesn’t sound like a one off of I forgot the towel though and sounds like they’re doing it regularly. There’s no reason it can’t be part of preparing the bath routine of running it and grabbing everything you need at the same time before the child goes in. Also, a bath doesn’t exactly take long, he can put his son’s needs before his own and just hang fire for a glass of water. If I was that desperate, I’d use my hand with the sink tap - I’d rather not take that risk

This is pretty much what I do. Doesn’t happen often but if I need to pop out the bathroom I make sure I can hear words coming out his mouth the entire time.

I wouldn’t go downstairs but would be totally fine going into the next room to get a towel while continuing to talk to her so can hear her responding.

I also think layout of the bathroom is relevant. At our old house, you could see the whole bath from any of the bedroom doors, so sticking my head out of the bedroom meant I could always immediately see. So I could get a towel, stick head out of door, go and get pyjamas, stick head out of door. In our current house, you can’t see any of the bath until you’ve gone into the bathroom and round the door. Being further away from my sight line, even if not physically further away, would make me more cautious and I wouldn’t step out of the room for as long.